


Trickster

by Angelfish00



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempt at Humor, Dry Humping, Eating Disorders, F/F, F/M, Felix Hugo Fraldarius Being an Asshole, Fluff and Angst, Gay Panic, Hand Jobs, He is most the time, Homophobic Language, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, No Beta, Oral Sex, Panic Attacks, Praise Kink, Sexual Content, Slow To Update, Soft Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Suicide scene, Sylvain is a good boy, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, mention of suicide, only briefly mentioned
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-11
Updated: 2020-10-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:33:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 12
Words: 86,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23103283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angelfish00/pseuds/Angelfish00
Summary: His voice was oddly even and not the explosion Rodrigue was expecting. His son is getting more like this.With each passing year since the accident, Felix became more and more closed off to the people around him. And with Glenn's passing the year after... It didn't help."I'm going now." He opened the door to get out but Rodrigue grabbed his wrist firmly."Let me finish Felix." He was desperate at this point. He needs to communicate with more people than Sylvain and Sylvain needed to as well."You two have to let others in. If you don't-"Felix ripped his hand away and got out of the car, gathering the bags he brought with him into his free hand that wasn't holding onto the door."Just. Shut. Up. Maybe you should've thought about it back then when we tried to tell you all what was going on but you just turned the other way." His hand on the door tightened, knuckles Turning white. "And now when we've gotten used to relying on just each other, you try to ask us to let you in? Ridiculous."
Relationships: Dorothea Arnault/Ingrid Brandl Galatea, Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Comments: 31
Kudos: 103





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> I want to be able to update sooner but going through some overtime at work and other personal life business won't give me enough time to update frequently. I apologize.

The car pulled up and was put into park at the side. The building it was next to was fairly small but well maintained. The clock on the screen read 3:36.

'Four minutes.' The dark haired, middle aged man thought. 

"Are you certain about this Felix?" He turned to the teenager looking straight ahead but his eyes looked to his when he asked.

"Yes? I come here every Friday and weekends."

"Not that. Are you sure you want to quit fencing? You're so good at it. Don't you enjoy it?" He gave his son a somber smile.

"This is my last year in school. Most of my matches will be on Friday and Saturday. I wouldn't be able to come here if I did it this year." His eyes squinted "If I have to choose between the two, my answer is obvious. Enjoyment has nothing to do with it."

"I'm sure Sylvain won't mind you missing a day or two. If he found out, he wouldn't want you to quit for him."

His son turned to look straight ahead with a pensive expression and after a few moments he then said "I can't. If I start missing, no one will be with him those days."

"Doesn't his head nurse spend time with him? You said he likes her. She could be with him on the days of your matches."

Felix's face changed from passive to mild irritation. His scowl was showing that Rodrigue was failing at what he was trying to get across to him. At least he hasn't stormed out of the car yet. He has time to turn this around.

"Mercedes is one of the few he likes since she's one of the only people that actually listens to him, instead of writing him off as deranged. And while he does, she is exactly what you said. A nurse. She can't give him the support that people he's close to can."

He sighed through his nose and closed his eyes.

"Not everyone thinks he's deranged. It's just.... Hard to see him after the accident." He opened his eyes back up and also looked ahead out of the windshield. "What happened wasn't exactly the most.. practical way to handle it."

"Considering what was happening, he did what he could."

"It was a rough spot for you both to be in. He didn't have much time and when it got difficult he responded the way he believed was best at the time."

"That was the only way."

"No it wasn't Felix. He didn't have to go through with what he did."

"If it wasn't for him, we'd both be dead." His voice was starting to raise. But Rodrigue had to get him to understand. Hopefully he could convince him.

"And I am grateful that he did what he thought he needed to. I'm just trying to explain that he did not need to act so brashly or so-" He cut himself off before saying what he believed about the situation. Saying it will only upset Feix more.

"So what? Are you going to say the same thing Dimitri or Ingrid does? What everyone says when I ask them why they haven't come to see him at all anymore? Why they don't even call him?"

This is moving downhill fast.

"What? No. I'm not. He was a child then. It only put everyone off because, instead of calling for help or disarming him, he took things into his own hands and it turned very unpleasant. And that's putting it lightly." He looked back over to Felix to see his lips in a thin line, eyebrows down. "The reason no one sees or talks to him is because he doesn't want them to. He only lets you in."

"That's a load of shit. He asks about everyone every week when I come in. I don't know why you all feel like lying to me. And with handling it, how else would you expect a fifteen year old to take on someone that's almost twenty?"

"What he did was absolutely inhumane, barbaric even, and he shouldn't have done it." Rodrigue let his tongue slip.

That was the wrong thing to say. Felix's head went down, staring at the floorboard.

"Shouldn't have done it." Felix spoke so quietly that Rodrigue didn't know if he was supposed to hear it or not.

The air was tense in the vehicle and Rodrigue just waited for the inevitable.

"I'm not speaking about this anymore. Just drop it." 

His voice was oddly even and not the explosion Rodrigue was expecting. His son is getting more like this.With each passing year since the accident, Felix became more and more closed off to the people around him. And with Glenn's passing the year after... It didn't help.

"..... What if after the game, I bring Dimitri back and you three can-"

"I'm going now." He opened the door to get out but Rodrigue grabbed his wrist firmly. 

"Let me finish Felix." He was desperate at this point. He needs to communicate with more people than Sylvain and Sylvain needed to as well. 

"You two have to let others in. If you don't-"

Felix ripped his hand away and got out of the car, gathering the bags he brought with him into his free hand that wasn't holding onto the door.

"Just. Shut. Up. Maybe you should've thought about it back then when we tried to tell you all what was going on but you just turned the other way." His hand on the door tightened, knuckles Turning white. "And now when we've gotten used to relying on just each other, you try to ask us to let you in? Ridiculous."

"Felix-"

He slammed the door, turned and made his way to the doors. He was going through his pockets when he heard footsteps. He glanced behind him and saw his father coming up. He searched faster until he finally managed to find what he was looking for.

He put the card up to the sensor on the door and when it unlocked, he hurried inside. Rodrigue was standing at the door now.

"Let me come in son. Please. We have to talk about this." His voice was muffled from the door between them.

"Come pick me up at seven." He left the door, his father's voice getting lower until he no longer heard it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Walking closer to the desk, Felix looked at the clock overhead. It was 3:47 p.m. He was a little late.

Walking up to the desk, he saw two regulars that worked at the clinic. 

The woman with light blue hair spoke first due to the dark green haired man looking through the computer in front of him with a lazy posture, free hand on the desk and hand under his chin.

"Felix. You're here. Mercedes is waiting for you in the Office to speak with you."

"Thanks Marianne." What happened?

Linhart, not looking up from the computer, spoke "It's nothing too serious but it is important. I would tell you my opinion on it but, I'm not Sylvain's main caretaker, so it won't matter."

Felix walked to the Office where she was waiting after giving Linhart a small glare.

Opening the door, he seen that Mercedes had her not quite shoulder length hair pushed back by her headband. She must've been with one of the patients right before he came.

Hearing the door close, her purple eyes looked up and her normal expression turned gently into her nurturing smile. 

"There you are. I have news for this week."

"The usual I guess? No problems other than moments of forgetfulness and his OCD problem?"

"That but there's also some other things I have to mention." She motioned fot him to sit in one of the two seats in front of her desk.

He sat down, confused, sitting the bags down in the seat next to him.

Once he looked her way she waited a moment to get her words then spoke "He had a visitor yesterday. As you know, visitation is only on weekends. But they insisted that I had them speak to Sylvain."

"I see..... How is this bad exactly?" 

"It was Mr. Gautier. His father."

He froze up. That wasn't good. That man always came to stir up trouble and make things difficult. Mercedes couldn't say no. He paid for all the expenses for Sylvain to be here and Margrave knew it.

"What happened?"

"He gave Sylvain a envelope and when he read it, he just shut off for the rest of the day." She looked down, saddened "No matter what I said he barely responded at best. He wouldn't tell me anything. And I thought that I was making good progress with him too."

"Maybe after I talk to him, he'll open up and tell you."

Her expression tightened "That's the thing Felix. People shouldn't have to go to you everytime he shuts down. You won't be with him 24/7."

His face matched hers "Maybe not, but there's things he shouldn't have to tell everyone. He's allowed to some secrets."

"With his condition, he needs to tell me everything concerning why he behaves like this. His personal matters? I don't have to know. But when he closes himself off to this degree, he needs to tell me. Just in case there might be a repeat of four years ago."

He promptly stood up "I would think that after you've been here with him that you would know that what happened wasn't his fault."

"No. His condition is what made him react the way he did. Sylvain himself wouldn't do that. However, due to the way he was treated by said person-"

"Just say his name. It's not like I can't stand to hear it. I hate talking about him but if I have to I can." He spat out.

She looked to him to confirm he meant it, then cleared her throat before she started again. "Okay then. Due to the way his brother treated him, he already had a rocky relationship. He winded up doing to Miklan what he did to Sylvain, only..." She looked to the side "He actually succeeded in what his brother attempted."

"He let that ass get away with everything he did to him. It was only when others got involved that Sylvain acted against him." He seethed "No one took up for him when he would have bruises, cuts or injuries that didn't match his stories. And him "falling" into the well that he was stuck in for days. Yet the ONE time he fights back, and he's crazy?"

"I'm not agreeing with everyone else. I'm trying to tell you it's hard to release him when he doesn't tell me things. Felix I wanted to tell you without just dropping it on you but." She paused looking over him. "We have to keep him another month."

He looked at her in question. "Why? You said the end of this month would be his last."

"He had a accident this morning. I know what happened but if he doesn't tell me in his own words, I can't write it off as happenstance."

"Did he hurt himself?"

"He did. Not intentionally but where he wouldn't say, that's what I have to put down."

"I see. And I guess that even if he told you now it wouldn't change the outcome?"

With a tired look she responded "I'm afraid not. We sent in the statement and that's what they told us to do."

"Alright fine. I'll see if maybe I can get him to tell you. Not making any promises." He picked up his things and made his way back to the door. "We done here? I would like to get to him before time is up."

"Oh! Yes of course. I'm sorry to take up your time. Thank you Felix." He didn't notice the defeated look in her eyes as he was leaving, too concerned for Sylvain worrying over him still not there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He found room number 24 and before sliding his card into the slot to unlock the door, he peered into the room from the window next to the door. Sylvain had his arms bound by straps to the side of the bed, a small gauze on his forehead (must have got hurt from falling off the bed from his nightmare) and had his head turned to the TV. While he was watching, he had a distant look in his eyes.

He had a rough time and Felix wished they would have called him after Margrave came here. Now he had to slowly work on him until he said what was needed or it wouldn't be hard at at and he would tell him as soon as he asked. Sylvain is one way or another, nothing in between.

He slid the card and slid his way in slowly, to not alert him. Reaching over, he closed the curtain viewing into the room.He leisurely moved over to the bed and spoke "Sylvain."

Honey eyes immediately locked with his. The blank look was still there but, the flicker of recognition told Felix it wouldn't be difficult to pull him from his mind this time.

He pulled the chair closer to the bed to sit right next to the counter and sat his things down on it, then plopped down on the seat.

He put one of his hands up and touched the tips of his fingers to Sylvain's hand, watching for a flinch. When there wasn't, he put his hand on top of his and carefully closed his fingers and waited. 

Sylvain watched him, surveying his every move. When Felix closed his fingers around his, his eyes focused on them and the emptiness drifted away. He turned his arm within the restraints and held onto the smaller hand. "You're here."

"I am. I'm sorry I'm late. Talk with Mercedes lasted longer and I got held up with the old man outside again." He replied lightly. He took his opposite hand and carefully moved crimson hair from the gauze to look closer at it. "Does it hurt?"

"A little. Dull."

"Did you fall off the bed?"

He nodded. 

"Nightmare?" Another nod. "Which one?"

Sylvain, after a hesitant moment responded, head down, looking at the sheets "The one at the cabin. Around the time where you.. Started calling for help... The one where I don't make it in time.. I. I." His eyes were clear and teary. "I wasn't fast enough."

"Felix squeezed his hand a bit. "But you were. I'm right here." He turned the older boys head to face him. "You did make it in time. I'm safe now."

"You're safe now?"

He smiled "That's right. I'm safe. You didn't fail."

"Felix." He was fully aware now, his grip was firm but not uncomfortable. "How long was I away?"

"A few minutes but I was more than an hour later than most days so it's okay."

"You and Rodrigue fought again, didn't you?"

"Just a small disagreement. It's nothing."

"Why?"

"I didn't sign onto any of my teams this year." He seen Sylvain's eyes widen.

"What? Why did you quit?" He didn't answer. "You quit for me." He sighed. "Felix, don't quit for a loser like me. I'm not worth you throwing your life away."

"I quit because I wanted to. I'm not going to do those things when I graduate anyway." He responded "Besides, I already have a good job that pays decent and I'm going to be working there after school except the days I come see you."

He didn't look convinced but dropped the topic and spoke "Speaking of jobs, I actually might have one too once I'm out. Nothing great but the pays good for what it is."

With a rose eyebrow "What?"

"Just a third shift job at a convenience store/ restaurant. Me being a wack job, it's probably the best I'll ever get." He joked.

"You're not crazy."

"True. Psycho is the word I'm looking for."

"Would you stop? You have a disorder. Plenty of people have them."

"Haha. Not many have the one where you murder a family member in cold blood."

"That's enough." He said under his breath. 

"What?"

In a clear, firmer tone he repeated "I said that's enough." He let go of the others hand "You might have killed Miklan, but if you wouldn't have he would've killed us. You were defending yourself and protecting me. Everytime I convince you it's fine, some jackass comes along and makes you doubt me."

"That's not what I-"

"Do you not trust me? You take others words above mine. You always prattle on about how much of a monster you are but don't you think that maybe I could be just as bad for allowing you to do what you did? I was there too."

"None of what happened was you're fault Felix."

"You sure about that? You made excuses for him when he beat and berated you, but as soon as he put his hands on me you reacted. By that logic, it is my fault."

"That's a stupid way to think."

"Well that's how you sound, using your past as a way to call yourself crazy. Others have your diagnosis too, you know?"

"Alright. Alright Felix. I get it. I'm sorry." He finally smiled at him for real instead of the fake one he'd been using. "I should just be happy you're here. And here I am working you up. If I don't stop being an idiot I'll lose you too."

"Stop. Don't talk like that."

"When I fell off the bed, I hit my head on the corner of the counter. That's what the gauze is. I didn't tell Mercedes the dream because, well, I don't like talking into detail over seeing you like that."

'He's talking about the dream now? I guess to wind us both down.' 

"She does prefer the details doesn't she?" He put their hands together again. "I know you don't like to. But she's here to help. Sometimes talking about it will help you. You can stop if it doesn't but you should still try."

"Okay. I'll tell her about it the next time I speak to her at our session."

With a tender smile Felix said "Good. Now that that's out of the way..." He dug through one of the bags he brought, pulling out a board game. "You said Linhart was telling you about this right? We can't play it today but tomorrow once you're not restrained. Honestly, why do they do that?"

"It's protocol. It's seen as self-destructive, self-harm. They don't have a choice really."

"If you told her, you wouldn't be bound right now." He put the board game in the cupboard that had the slip of paper that had games wrote on it.

"Maybe, maybe not. I bled so I might have been either way." Felix grabbed the other bag with all the fruit he brought with him. "What do you have?"

"Apples." He took his pocket knife and started peeling the skin. "It's been awhile since you had perfectly ripe ones. One of the only things that's bad about this place is they can't keep their fruits and vegetables ripe worth shit."

"And I appreciate you bringing these to me but.... Are you allowed to have that" he gestured to the knife with a flick of his head "in here with you?"

Felix glanced up at him, pausing his cutting of the apple, then went back to it. "I am. As long as I don't give it to you."

"Oh... Right! Of course." He let out a dry laugh. 

He looked up again to see Sylvain had the empty look in his eyes again. He closed his eyes for a beat before wiping the knife off and sitting everything on the plate he left on the bedside counter. He stood up and pushed Sylvain's legs together before sitting on top of him, knees beside his hips and sat his weight on his thighs. He reached over and grabbed the plate with the apple and knife and started peeling and cutting it again. 

Eyes shocked, Sylvain started "Felix? What are you-" A piece of an apple was placed on his lips.

"Eat." He put little pressure on his lips before he opened up a bit more and took the fruit in his mouth and started to chew. "Quit spacing out like that when I'm here. It irritates me."

He didn't let Sylvain respond. Everytime he tried, he would just put another cut piece on his mouth. And being the pleaser that he is, he stopped trying and just ate the apple. After they got halfway through Felix asked "Better now?"

He nodded before backtracking and shook his head. The amber eyed teen's eyebrow twiched. "Yes or no idiot?"

He had a teasing grin on his face. "It's good, but I thought with your position you would feed it to me differently."

He wasn't in the mood for this today. "What are you talking about you insatiable halfwit? Isn't this enough for you?"

"You make it sound like I'm greedy. This is plenty but where I can't touch you, it's not quite enough."

"Then what do you want?" He huffed. "Only one more thing and that's it." Sylvain opened his mouth but Felix cut him off. "And no take backs."

"Aww. You make this so difficult." He looked up. His thumb would be under his chin right now, with his hand in a loose fist if it wasn't for the restraints around his arms. He hummed for a few seconds before he nodded his head once to agree with himself. Felix prepared for what the perv wanted. "I want you to....." He tried to keep a neutral expression to show Sylvain he won't fall for his antics but his heart was starting to flutter and he felt the tips of his ears get hot. "Feed me."

He stopped being flustered to give the nineteen year old a look that screamed dumbass. "I'm already feeding-"

"Without using your hands." His face exploded in embarrassment as soon as the words left Sylvain's lips.

"In other words, you want a kiss?"

"Yes. I'll still get my fruit too. It's a win win." He answered with a closed eye smile.

"You sound so sure of yourself. And that's it? Nothing else? You're not going to beg me for something else afterwards?"

"Nope. After this whatever we do for the rest of the time is up to you." Felix still didn't fully trust his intentions. He was up to something but, maybe he didn't want to do much today where he was restrained to the bed.

"Fine." He heard the older teen make a closed mouth shriek of excitement. He felt his cheeks flush a bit. "Don't be disappointed when it's not what you expect."

"I'm never disappointed with you."

With those words said like that, Felix would do whatever he wanted, even though he'd never say that to him. Anyone for that matter. 

He cut the last bit left of the apple before sitting the knife down on the counter and placing a quarter of the apple slice into his own mouth. He gingerly leaned closer to the other and when Sylvain opened up the slightest bit, he hesitantly paused before continuing.

He stopped when some of the fruit was touching the others lips. He felt honey eyes on him but he couldn't look up, he never could hold eye contact well. As soon as the apple moved from the other biting down, he pulled away. And without looking just grabbed another bite and waited. The legs under him moved him. He put the next one in. This time though, before he could move back, Sylvain moved faster and connected with him.

He made a sound of shock from the quick movement but kept still. The fruit was taken from him and after swallowed, they repeated the scene over and over until Felix was no longer nervous about being so close, until eventually they made it to the last peice.

After that, he didn't pull back and was only a breath away from Sylvain and after he seen his throat move from swallowing, he looked up and seen that he was waiting. He was only gonna go further if Felix wanted to. It's how it's always been after they started whatever "this" was.

He raised his hands and put both on either cheek, letting them drift slowly back and stopped when the tips of his fingers were touching his hair and tilted his head and let his eyelids fall. 

Moving their mouths together sweetly and carefully. He felt Sylvain twich his arms trying to move his arms to hold onto him. He dragged his hands down the white shirt and held onto his forearms to steady himself. He pulled away long enough to say "This is what you were planning wasn't it?" Then went back to locking lips, his arms finding their way back up and around Sylvain's shoulders.

"I was mostly doing it to tease you and see how far you would have let me take it." Saying while their mouths still touching. 

"How far were you hoping?" He asked genuinely curious. 

"Just some nice making out. That's enough for me." A smile coming from each of them.

"Of course you're that much of a sap."

"Hey now, you don't have to be rude. I appreciate the little things."

"Sylvain." The black haired coarsely replied.

"Yes?"

"Shut up." He silenced the other by kissing him again and they didn't pull away for anything other than to catch their breath.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The kiss was getting more heated. Felix didn't know when he started moving his hips and making such noises. He didn't know he could get so worked up over such a simple thing as this. He had his hands clutching Sylvain's shirt so tightly to keep them close. Sylvain was moving his hips up, matching when his would roll down.

"Haaah.... Felix." The moans leaving Sylvain was starting to get him worked up, leading him to have his hands make their way down Sylvain's torso to the front of his pants. 

When Felix started to unbutton and unzip his pants, Sylvain pulled from the kiss and started giving small bites to Felix's neck. Nothing hard enough to leave marks, but just enough for the other to think he might.

When he finished with pulling his clothes away from what he was wanting, Felix went to pull his own member out of it's confinement. Both were already hard from the kissing and grinding.

He reached over to the private bed drawer, grabbing the lotion to make the slide of his hands easier. Once he rubbed it on both hands he moved even closer to the hot body under him and started moving his hands up and down.

Both sighed in pleasure, Felix moving his head slightly to the side when Sylvain dropped his onto his shoulder, Turning his head to face his neck to drown out his voice.(They don't want to get caught after all.) 

His hands that were holding them together while his movement was giving them friction felt wonderful but it wasn't enough for them to get off. Felix moved his thumb over the heads and on the slits, going back and forth over them until he felt the body under him tense and a gasp at his neck.

"Shit.. I'm not gonna last long Fe." He whispered into Felix's ear.

"Go ahead whenever you want." The panting on his neck was getting him close too but it still wasn't enough. He needed-

Little pecks to the bend of his neck interrupted his thoughts, then, as if knowing, Sylvain began talking into his ear after kissing him. "You're doing so good. No one else can make me feel like this. "He stopped his moving from the jolt that went down his spine. Sylvain smiled. 

"Only you. You're the only one that can do this to me. Feels amazing. You're perfect and so-"

"Aahh. Syl."

"Gorgeous on top of me. Do you want to know what you look like when we do this?"

"No. Stop." He was shivering now and his hands had stopped. The only movement they were getting was Sylvain lifting his hips.

"How your eyes get wet, tears almost falling. The cute blush that starts at your ears and moves down all the way to your chest from how much pleasure you feel." Felix was starting to let out whimpers and small moans. One of his hands moved up to block the sounds coming from him.

"I wish my arms weren't bound." He gave kisses, moving from Felix's neck to jaw, to cheek, until he was right at the hand covering the others mouth, still letting out sweet sounds. "The things I would do to you." 

The gasp that came from him told Sylvain he was close. Just a little more. "Pull you closer by your hips. The way you love to be held. Treat you so well. Give you everything you want and then even more. Keep giving it to you till you're-"

"AHhhmmmm." Felix came loudly but was cut off by Sylvain putting his mouth back on his. With a few more hip moments of his own, he finished himself. 

After catching their breath Sylvain broke the silence. "Why do you always choose the third week?" Felix was rest his weight on his chest, with his face turned to him.

"What?"

"You always wait until the third weekend to do this stuff. I'm just wondering." The only answer he got was a huff. "Is it the cleaning schedule of the workers here?" From Felix smushing his cheek more into him, he knee he was right. "I see... Let me guess. I think this week laundry is.... Linhart?"

"Asshole needs to mind his damn business.." Was the pouty reply he got in return. 

"So you don't like him huh? Odd. I think you two would get along well if you would actually speak to one another." He heard a snort.

"Yeah fucking right. He's way too lazy and laid back. If he knew he was able to get away with it, he'd let you clean during his weeks."

Sylvain hummed a laugh. "You're right. He probably would."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"How much do you wanna bet they're doing the dirty again?" Linhart said to the blue haired nurse beside him on her own computer. 

"Hmm? I'm sorry Linhart?" Her voice barely reaching him.

"Dirtying the bedsheets. They do it everytime. It's disgusting. I have to always wash the sheets from that room twice because I want to make sure I get all their cum off of it."

She was flustered by how blunt he was being about this. "I don't know what you mean. Sylvain's sheets are usually still pretty clean during my weeks of laundry. I don't have that issue."

He looked a little surprised from her answer. "You mean it's just me?" He thought while fixing his bun in his half up updo. He then made a aggravated, lazy sigh. "Off course it is. Probably Felix's doing too."

She started fidgeting with her hands in her lap. "I don't know for sure.Felix isn't like that. He may be a little harsh at times but he's very well mannered."

"Right. I doubt that highly. I'm going to go in there later when Sylvain is gone, bathing while I switch sheets and then I'll see it. They always do it early enough for it to dr-" His rant was cut short by a sneeze. "Huh? Hope I'm not catching a cold."

"Yes. Please take care of yourself and keep warm."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


	2. Not what it seems

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who needs shoes? Am I right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh these 12 hour shifts are killer. Can't get anything done. Hope everyone is okay with all the madness going on currently. When you see the exclamation points in the story it is to show something serious is happening.It might not but if you feel uncomfortable reading about abuse please skip it. I put more exclamations down when they're done. I'll try to keep it where it isn't confusing in the story if you skip it. I don't think it's anything too bad since it's just being talked about but take caution.

Felix was adjusting and putting their clothes back in order. Sylvain looked over and saw the other bag sitting next to the one with the fruit. Curiosity overtook him and he asked "Hey Felix? What's in the other bag?"

Felix gathered the sheet and pushed it into the chair he was once sitting in and answered "Bernadetta asked me to bring it. It's her new-"

"Her new chapter!? Nice! Can't wait to see what happens next. The last one was pretty good so I don't know how she'll top it." He spouted excitedly. "Too bad I won't be able to read it until tomorrow."

"It's why I didn't tell you right away. I knew you would be down about it." Felix said, getting comfortable still sitting on the others lap.

"I'm actually more bummed out she didn't come herself. She okay?" 

"She's fine. Lysithia and Annette wanted her to go with them to try out this new sweets place." He pulled the phone from his back pocket and went through his messages and hit Annette in his contacts, pulling up the picture she sent during their "activity". He turned the screen so Sylvain could see. "She wanted to come but those two dragged her."

Sylvain looked at the picture with a proud smile. While Bernadetta did look a little nervous, she was smiling with the other two, happy. "It's fine. She's getting out and making friends. I'd rather she do that then come back here." He shook his head "Hell, I'll probably try to avoid this place too once I'm released."

Felix took the folder with her story and put it into the private cabinet beside the bed. "Just when you read it, make sure you don't have something else to do first. You always lose track of time with her stories."

"I can't help it. She's really good. You should read one of them when you get the chance. She won't listen to me whenever I tell her that she should get them published. Others telling her might give her the confidence she needs and-"

Felix just watched him carry on, content in listening to Sylvain ramble on about one of the things that got him to relax and smile the way he is now. In just two more months he won't be here anymore. They've waited for four years. Sylvain has been wanting to meet the people Felix calls his friends.

"Hey Felix.... Felix."

"Hmm?"

"You spaced out a sec there. Did I bore you with my fanning over the books?" He was worried that he was boring Felix by the wary smile he was showing. 

"No." He wrapped his arms around the other, arms under Sylvain's. "Just listening to you. I prefer hearing you happy about something, instead of closing off and be distant."

"Was I really that bad when I first got here?"

"Not exactly. The second year was the worst. You got to where you would barely speak to me and you told the nurses you didn't want visitors. You even refused me a few times." He was just explaining but remembering that time when Sylvain's mind was in it's worst possible state, reminded Felix how close he was to losing someone else that means so much.

"I'm sorry. I put you through a difficult time." His voice suddenly changed optimistic "but I'm going to make it up to you once I'm out there."

"You have nothing to make up for. That's the past. We're here now. We got through it. That's all that matters."

"......."

With no response coming from the older teen, he rose his head from Sylvain's chest. "What's wrong?"

"Oh nothing." Shit, that smile. He's about to say something to tease him. "It's just that you're super cute when you speak like that." He sighed dramatically "You don't ever do it when there's someone else around."

"N-no one needs to know how I talk to you in private."

His grin got bigger. "Ah? Was that a stutter I just heard? I can only take so much of you being cute before I feel the flutters in my stomach."

"You didn't hear anything. And if you keeping insisting on being an idiot, you're going to feel more than flutters in your stomach."

"No need to get violent." 

He went back to the conversation about Bernadetta. "I thought she was working on a game?"

"She is. What she brought you was probably what I asked her for to help with the score I'm going to make for her."

"Score?" Felix looked over to the keyboard and guitar over in the corner. "You're writing the music for it?"

"Yeah but not all of it. Just a song or two. I asked if I could. It keeps me busy."

"Don't you have to work here? You're "chores" or what not?"

"I get finished way early anymore with that stuff."

"You have quite a bit to do on your list. If you finish that early you must not be taking breaks or eating." He eyed him curiously.

"Uhh... Well." The curiosity was Turning into frustration.

"Sylvain." The lecturing tone made him tense a bit. Felix huffed afterwards. "You do know that them releasing you doesn't just mean you're not hurting yourself or others physically right?" He rose up from the comfortable position he was in to see if the redhead was listening. "If you exhaust yourself and collapse it counts too."

Sylvain was frowning and facing away from Felix, trying to ignore the guilt he felt. He just can't keep still when everything wasn't in the right place and he wasn't-

A knock on the door made them both jump, Felix huried back into the chair just in time for Mercedes to walk in.

"Sorry for intruding but it's time for you to go Felix. It's also time for you to take a bath. Or shower. Whatever you prefer." She walked to the bed and started undoing the restraints on the bed. "I can't understand why you just won't tell me what it was that bothered you so much. Do you feel like you can tell me now?" She put one hand on his shoulder and gave him the reassuring smile she does to all the patients here when trying to get them to do what they needed to do.

Sylvain, lips straight, emotion in his eyes unsure. "I think so."

He didn't mean to, but Felix felt himself get impatient and he didn't want to admit it but also.... Angry?Disappointed? He didn't know the word. But this is what he wanted Sylvain to do right...? "... Um. I'll just head out then." He hastily rose from the seat and took his things, moving his way out of the room.

Shutting the door and walking to the front, he seen Linhart waiting, leaning on the desk, hair in a low ponytail and not theHe inwardly stiffened up. "What?"

"It's honestly what you've already heard from me." He closed his eyes. "But I don't think you should continue the relationship you have with him. At least wait until you're eighteen."

Felix rolled his eyes as an answer and made back to walking out.

"I know that you're old enough to decide. If the wrong person finds out however, Sylvain could get into trouble."

"We're keeping it secret enough. We know what could happen. My Birthday is in a few months. Don't need you nagging me." He crossed his arms over each other. "He's only a little two years older than me. It's not a big deal.

The green haired nurse frowned at him. "Perhaps not. I'm just saying how some could react unexpectedly due to it. I'm not telling you to stop completely, just until your eighteen at least."

"Hmph. Thanks for the concern but we know what we're doing." He gave a snide response. "You should stay out of things that aren't your business."

Instead of waiting for Linhart's reply, he started to the exit doors. But hearing Mercedes's voice calling out to Sylvain stopped him.

"Sylvain, you should put your shoes on first! The floors are cold. Please don't run either, you could fall."

He barely turned his body before he felt arms wrapping around his shoulders. He dropped his bag to return the embrace he was in.

"What are you doing? You're going to get sick running around barefoot in this cold ass building." He muffled through the shirt in a low volume. 

"Just wanted to get a proper goodbye is all. It'll be a while before you get back."

He couldn't help the tiny laugh of amusement that left him. "I'll be back tomorrow."

"It's still time apart also..." he moved even closer into the hug that almost seemed impossible. "I didn't like that look you had before you left."

"What look?" 

"You looked so dejected and heartbroken. You should tell me what's bothering you, instead of letting things get so bad you make such a face."

That's what he was feeling? Sylvain DID know how to read emotions way more than Felix but for him to know the younger better than Felix himself was relieving but also a bit offputting. He answered before Sylvain got too questioning. "I'm fine. I'll tell you about it tomorrow okay?"

The redhead was quiet just long enough to make it get a little uncomfortable before he pulled away and his hands were resting on Felix's shoulders. He took a few moments to look over Felix, then said "don't take what others say or do to you if you don't like it. You might have to bite your tongue with everyone else, but you can tell me anything." His gaze was so intense that amber eyes had to look to the side a moment before Turning back.

He worked up the nerve to look at the others eyes and when he did, Sylvain lowered and gave him a peck on his cheek. He moved his head to meet his lips instead. When they started to get closer to one another, they heard a throat clearing behind Sylvain. 

Linhart was giving them a less than impressed expression. Sylvain started to back away but Felix, already provoked from the conversation before, put one hand on the back of the taller ones nape and pulled him back in. He fixed a glare in Linhart direction and when he knew he was paying attention, he pulled away, he gently touched his tongue to Sylvain's lips and slipped into the others mouth. He increased his mean look before he lowered his hand and looked back to the one in front of him.

"I'll tell you tomorrow. Focus on yourself for now. Mercedes will ask you questions in the morning. And once you're done, I'll be here to help."

The tension the older tried to hide went away by Felix assuring him. "I'll tell her what's needed. That's all." 

They held each other once more before Felix pulled away. Flustered from all the PDA."Go on and get clean moron and put some shoes on before you get sick."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He got into the backseat of the car, knowing that the front passenger seat was taken. Nothing was said as the car drove away, on the way to the next destination.Rodrigue spoke up when they were close to the house.

"Reason you didn't get in the front?"

Felix was about to lash until he seen the seat was indeed empty next to his father. His eyebrows furrowed.

"Where is he?"

"He was tired. Coach pushed him like a madman tonight so I dropped him off first at home. I can see why the coach did of course, considering the one that switches with him most times is no longer on the team." Rodrigue was trying to hint that he was still disappointed by Felix not playing this year with the emphasis increasing closer to the end.

He lowered into the seat and crossed his arms "Not my fault the rest of the team is a hindrance to him more than help."

"Felix." The stern voice was coming out. 

"I made up my mind and I'm not changing it. No matter what you say." He looked out the window after he was done.

The long, heavy sigh he heard let him know it was over and the rest of their ride was in silence.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He tried to get to his room before he ran into Dimitri. He might've been asleep but Felix highly doubted so. Dimitri hardly ever slept anymore. Rodrigue took him in after his father died while on the job. Not long after his mother took off one night without saying anything.

CPS got involved and after fighting tooth and nail, his father somehow managed to take him in. That was just the start of Dimitri's downward spiral. What broke him was when he found Glenn. Everyone was messed up from it but.. They all eventually went back to what you would say normal yet something with him was different. He never recovered and even when Felix insisted Dimitri get help, both him and his father agreed that he didn't. 

Rodrigue couldn't see it or chose to remain naive. Dimitri was a good actor but there were times he'd let the mask crack however, it was almost like Felix was the only one to see those moments. 

Lost in his thoughts, he didn't hear or see the door to the bathroom open and he collided with the person coming out.

Seeing the recognizable pajama pants and tank top in front of him, he knew that he just bumped into the one he wanted to avoid. 

"Felix. Are you alright?" Dimitri had a small towel around his shoulders to keep the drops of water dripping from his damp hair from getting on anything. 

Felix stepped back a little to make some distance. "I'm fine." He looked down at an angle. 

"Good... Um.. How was Sylvain? Better I hope." He was being awkward, finger rubbing his cheek around his jaw.

"Doing fine also."

"Right. I- well-"

Assuming that their conversation was going nowhere, Felix walked around him and headed back to his room.

"Wait!" 

He felt a hand at the bend of his elbow. He looked seeing that Dimitri grabbed him but as soon as they both realized so, the blonde jerked his hand back as if the touch burned him.

"I was wondering if maybe... If I could go with you tomorrow... To see him.. Sylvain."

Felix was taken aback by that. It took him a few moments to process. "Wait. You want to see Sylvain?"

"Yes." He nodded along with saying. "I actually have been wanting to for quite a bit now.

Sceptical, Felix asked "Why?"

"Do I need a reason?" He gripped the towel around his shoulders. "Sylvain is my friend as well. I know I haven't went to see him that much but I have also had a busy schedule."

"Well, don't clear out your busy schedule for his account. He's done just fine with me being the only person from childhood to continue seeing him." He shot back getting aggravated.

"No! I didn't mean it that way I swear." Dimitri stopped and composed himself. "I want to see him. I've went this long trying to recover from my own problems and I just recently realized that, even with the help I've had, it was hard for me. So with him, who has only had you and no one else. It must have been very hard for him. And you as well." He explained with knowing understanding. "I simply wish to start helping from this day forward.. If you'll allow me."

If Dimitri had not been looking down, he would've seen Felix at a loss of what to say instead of believing that he was still angry with him until Felix finally said "Very well. You can come with me tomorrow."

Dimitri's head shot back up to lock eyes with Felix. "Truly!? Thank you Felix." He bowed and within doing so, water droplets from his hair hit the other with the speed he used. "Ah!? Forgive me. I didn't know my hair was still so-"

"Are you that incompetent that you can't dry your hair right?" He sounded less irritated than what he was trying to seem. He walked up and grabbed the towel around his shoulders and started to scrub his hair (rather roughly) to dry it. "Honestly. You're like a child not even drying it correctly. You're going to get sick idiot."

"Thank you. I appreciate it." His voice was going from clear to muffled with the rough yet not painful treatment with the towel over his head. "When will we be going?"

"Later in the evening. I work tomorrow until six. Bernadetta will be there in the morning and she prefers no one else but them two when she's there. Annette will be there when she leaves and Lysithia might go with her if she's feeling up to it."

"Should I just wait for you at your work place for you around the time you get off?" He lowered his head a bit for Felix to reach a bit better. And from doing so, the pressure lessened a bit on his head.

"I don't care either way. Do what you want." 

"Very well. I will do that then." He chuckled. The towel stopped and was removed from his hair. He looked at Felix and before he was able to determine the expression he seen, the towel, which was now fairly damp hit him in his face.

"There. Done. Do it right from now on. I won't do it anymore and I'm only gonna tell you this once so pay attention." He waited for Dimitri to move the towel. "After work I'll take a shower and change, then head to the clinic. I'll get there around seven thirty. I'll be staying there that night since I'm allowed. So make sure you have a way back here when you leave."

"Right. Of course. I'll tell Rodrigue." He responded a little excitedly. 

Felix went into his room and shut the door by leaning back against it. He thought about what just happened and then sighed heavily. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Okay Sylvain. Lets do this before Bernadetta arrives." Mercedes shut the curtains all the way in her office.

He tried to make himself comfortable on the chaise lounge. He couldn't and settled with how he was.

She walked back over to him and crouched down next to his face. She then put her palm on his forehead. "It'll be okay. I promise. We won't get into the worst of it today." She pet his hair a little before getting back up and walked over to her chair. 

Picking up her clipboard she then wrote down a few things, then looked back up to Sylvain. "I want you to talk to me about how your relationship was with your brother. Can you?"

"Not exactly my preference of conversation topics but I'm willing to make an exception for you Mercedes." He teased lightly.

With a smile she said "Good. Now if you should want to stop at anytime, please tell me. Don't try to push it if you don't want to."

"I'll be fine." He chuckled at her. "We talk about this all the time, surely you've got all the notes you can from this."

She kept her smile while writing but the first sentence was always very similar in her notes.

'Trying to trivialize the situation with jokes and lighthearted conversation.'

"Now was your relationship always bad with him?"

"No. It wasn't until sometime after I started my lessons. So... I was about six or seven."

"How was he with you before? Nice, doting?"

He actually laughed. "No. Never that protective big brother stuff. But he did always help me when I asked or needed it."

She hummed to let him know to continue. 

"He liked his space but when I wanted to play with him, he almost always dropped what he was doing to do what I wanted."

"So you starting school and lessons is what made it start?"

"Yeah."

!!!!!~~~~~~!!!!!

"Did it start all at once or did it slowly evolve overtime?"

"The first time I noticed something off was after my first piano recital. I won by a margin to say the least. Dad, mom, and my tutor were proud. But Miklan.... He looked at me so strangely."

"Can you tell what the look was now?"

"Empty. At least, that's what I keep telling myself."

"And after that is when he started acting different?"

"Uh huh. First it was just little things like a mean joke. Then it started escalating into derogatory comments ,then little pushes and shoves, until eventually, next thing I know I'm being beaten, almost on a daily basis and then pushed into a well and wasn't found until three days later." 

This was more than what he ever told her. She would be happy but... With the way he was talking about it.. Was disturbing. It was like everything that happened to him was just a joke, almost funny. How terrible. 

"How old were you when he pushed you into the well?"

"Uhh. Nine. Maybe ten."

"It must have been terrifying."

He shrugged and put his arms behind his head. "I guess I was at the time. It was pretty cold. I tried to climb out a few times. Kept slipping from my fingers locking up from the cold. The last time I tried I almost made it but when I fell I ended up breaking my leg from the fall and couldn't try anymore."

!!!!!!~~~~~~!!!!!!

How heartbreaking. She's heard so many stories of abuse but she can never get used to them. For someone to do such things at all, especially to a child. She assured herself so her words wouldn't be shaky. "Who found you?"

"Felix and Glenn did. Felix took Glenn with him. He knew where I would be since Miklan told him but he didn't tell anyone."

"Why? Wouldn't the abuse have ceased?"

"No. He had already tried to tell people. They didn't believe him or Miklan would come up with a story that he wasn't near me. My parents believed I was doing it to get more attention. So I told Felix to stop saying anything as well."

"Then what was the difference from the last time you were with him? When you-"

"I'm not talking about that today." He cut through her words. "You said only the other thing."

His voice was firm. When she looked up from her clipboard, she felt a chill run down her spine. His expression was so threatening. But how? He was only looking at her with a straight face- no it was his eyes. He was looking right through her.

"I- I only-"

His laugh cut in. "I mean, if I do talk about that, I'll be too upset to talk to Bernadetta. I enjoy our Saturday morning shows. If I miss it, it'll be such a downer."

She unsurely decided to let him have his way, putting down the sudden mood change to tell the others later. 

"I understand. We'll stop here for today and try again Monday. That way you won't have anyone coming to see you. You'll have plenty of time to calm down."

"Thanks Mercedes."

~~~~~~~~~~

It had been an hour since Sylvain went back to his room but her heart was still not back to normal. He's never been that way before. Then again, he's told her more today then he ever has. She is already aware of his story however, hearing it from him is what is required for him to improve. 

"Maybe if I ask Felix to come on Monday, he'll calm Sylvain enough to get the full story." She said to herself looking at the clipboard. She shook her head. No. She couldn't go back on what she told Felix before. She has to somehow get it from him without Felix's help.

The door knocked to her office and she put her work away before saying come in to the one on the other side.

~~~~~~~~~~~

"Morning Felix. You're up early for the weekend." 

"Shut up. I may be up but I still don't have the capacity to deal with your voice yet." The cheerful tone Dimitri was using was pissing him off. How can people be so awake in this early in the morning and be happy. 

"Still not much of a morning person then?" He asked.

"Shh. Tea first."

Dimitri tried but unsuccessfully hid the laugh coming out. Watching The raven haired teenager get his hot water ready to make his tea. His eyes were ironically less harsh when he was sleepy. His tension was replaced by a slight slouch and his bun while a bit messy anyway, was hanging on the side. 

Felix turned and went back to the table and that's when he noticed his buttons on his shirt. They were crooked. "You know Felix, if you're that tired you should go back to sleep for a bit."

"I told you to stop talking. Your voice is annoying and grating my ears." 

Empty insults where he was slurring his words in his drowsiness. When the sun started hitting him through the window pane, he leaned unconsciously toward it, yawning and closing his eyes. When he did this Dimitri couldn't help but watch. It was like seeing the Felix of long ago.

He seemed gentle like this, if he had to compare him to anything it would be that- "Like a cat."

"What? What was that?" He asked still tired. 

"Nothing. Just talking to myself."

"Can you be more quiet then. Can't relax with you talking every minute."

"Of course."

Until Rodrigue came into the kitchen with them, they spent the rest of the time with Felix eventually dozing off with his head on the table, his tea going cold only able to take a few sips and Dimitri with one elbow on the table watching him, content.

~~~~~~~~~~

Bernadetta came up to Sylvain's room and entered swiftly after running past Manuela, Hanneman and Flayn. She gently slammed the door.

"Bernadetta? You're here. I was wondering if something was up. You're twenty minutes later than usual." He was at his table reading her manuscript.

"Bernie had other things to finish up first- I mean I had other things to do first." She pat her bag to check if her laptop was still there. It was half her size due to her small figure. 

Sylvain put a bookmark on the page and closed it. "Hey no problem. As long as you're safe yeah?" He stood up and went to her. "Want me to get everything set up or get us snacks and you do the other?"

"I'll set it up. You get us the goodies." Sylvain chuckled and ruffled her already crazy hair. She grasped his long sleeve. He looked back confused. "S-shoes first."

"Ugh. Right, gotcha." He said rolling his eyes playfully. He left after putting his shoes on.

She crouched down and got everything out on the counter with the TV. She was setting the laptop up and started talking when she was lost in her mind. "Not putting his shoes on. It wasn't a concern till he got a cold and Felix got upset at Bernie for letting Sylvain walk barefoot. It's not my fault." She pouted. 

She stopped when she noticed the TV. "The television is bigger.."

"Yeah. When I told Felix we had to snuggle up to watch your laptop on the bed or couch, he went out and got a smart widescreen for us." She let out an squeaky squeal when his voice came from nowhere. 

"Sylvain! Stop sneaking up on me! You're gonna make my heart explode." She said clutching her chest. "Wait. He did?"

"Sure did. It's pretty cool. It has-" He went into detail what all it does while she just had one thought going through her head over and over.

He looked to her after she didn't answer to her name. And seen her with both her hands in her hair. "Uhh... Are you o-"

"He doesn't trust Bernie!" She looked to the ceiling. "But why? Sylvain isn't my type! I'm not his type. We just have similar interests. That's all Felix!" She was running her hands wildly through her hair, flailing around and frankly talking nonsense in Sylvain's opinion. 

"Bernadetta. That isn't the reason. He got it because he knows you're uncomfortable with close proximity to people for extended periods of time."

She stopped her wiggling. "Huh? He did it for my sake?" She teared up. "And I thought so mean. You're a disgrace Bernie!"

"No you're not. Why don't we watch the show? What are we watching today?" He made himself comfortable on his bed at the foot.

She went and pushed the keys and sat at the couch in an Indian sitting position and they started the show.

~~~~~~~~~~~

When the credits started rolling to the fifth episode, she spoke to Sylvain. "Hey. There's something I have to ask."

"Ask away."

"The cosplay con is coming up and I wanted to ask if you wanted to come. It's in a month." He smiled at her.

"Let me get permission and I'll come." He got up and started helping her put her things away. She scooted a little more to him.

"I want to ask something else. Will you also cosplay with me?"

"Sure thing. We'll get the measurements once we're done here." 

"Great!"

~~~~~~~~~~~

He was in his underwear, Bernadetta taking the measurements on his legs now already done with the top.

He heard her gulp then speak to him. "I want to ask you to get Felix to come too."

"I'm sure he will since-"

"I want Sylvain to ask Felix to cosplay with us." She said it so fast he had to go over it a few time in his head.

"Hahaha. Good one. He's not gonna do that. I better get ready to get my chores done." He started to make his way back to his clothes. 

"No! Please listen. Felix is the best one for my idea this year. If he doesn't do it with us it'll throw the whole thing off." She grabbed his leg.

He tugged a little. "I'm not asking him. You should've picked something in case he said no."

She gripped tighter. "I can't. Only you have a chance of him saying yes."

They started bickering back and forth.

~~~~~~~~~~~

A red headed girl went into the entrance, going to the front desk letting them know she was here. She sang to herself on her way back to her destination. She was about to slide her card when she heard muffled voices and stopped. She leaned her ear against the door.

"Bernie begs! Pleads! Please do this for her!"

"No. I'm not- you know what fine. If you can get permission from Mercedes, for me to go and not just that, I want no nurses or doctors right at my back. If you can't do that then you have to ask him yourself" His voice sounded smug.

"....... That's all?"

"Yes."

"Then..." Paper was ruffling on the other side. "This?" It was silent for a beat then-

"How did you get permission already!?" He sounded so shocked. Then the girl listening in flinched when she heard a thud.

She had enough she had to open the door. She seen Sylvain on the floor, head down, Bernadetta on his back and he was only in his underwear?

"Am I interrupting something?" She was snickering at them both wore out from their "match".

"Ehh? Oh. Hi Annette."

"AHHH!!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going to go somewhere I promise just stick around. The girls and Dimitri are all around the same Age as Felix except Lysithia. She's a year younger and skipped a year due to her smarts.


	3. Circulation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spending time with friends you always have a good time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to make a fic that's super fluff but also angsty. The pacing might be a bit everywhere but I think I might have a good balance working itself out. Also, there's not enough flustered Felix. Why? There's another part here that could be triggering to some. Once again it's just talking but tread carefully.

Felix was stirred awake by his father chuckling over him. He lazily rose his head and Rodrigue put the breakfast he made on the table. 

"Morning you two. Felix, you could have slept in if you were going to pass out on the table."

Felix took his cup and took a sip of his tea. It wasn't cold but lukewarm. "I don't want to be late."

Dimitri looked to the clock. "You go in at ten on weekends." His eyebrows went in curiously. "It's only eight."

"Have to get my bag ready for the night." His words weren't as slurred as before but still had the low tone to show his sleepiness. 

Hearing that, Rodrigue hid his feelings behind his own cup with black coffee. Getting into it with Felix this early would ruin everyone's day and possibly their whole weekend. 

"If that's the case, you two should dig in to get the day started." He put his cup down and started grabbing food from the plates. "Dimitri." The ice blue eyes turned to him. "You have to go with me today for your assessment. I'll bring you home and you can get ready for later."

To be honest, Rodrigue didn't want Dimitri to go. Sylvain was a good kid however, he did do something drastic. And although he's thankful he was there for Felix, his emotions are unstable, unpredictable. Margrave said that he almost attacked him when he visited the other day. Dimitri had a habit of insulting others without realizing. If he spoke to Sylvain and made him mad unknowingly, he could get seriously injured. 

Of course, Dimitri can fend for himself but, he wouldn't hurt anyone, especially people he cared for and that's why he wanted to refuse. What changed his mind was Felix. They have their disagreements yes, but he trusts him and knows for a fact Felix won't allow either to injure the other.

And maybe. Just maybe, this will help Felix to move on from this nonsense.

"This was delicious. As always Rodrigue." Dimitri said politely. "Don't you agree Felix?"

Felix finished chewing his omelet before responding, "It's too salty. Why do you always put too much?"

"Well, I didn't realize the meat I used today would get salty after it cooked."

"Don't use that excuse. It's always salty. You even salt bacon. Who does that?"

Dimitri entered the conversation again. "I'm sure there is some that do. It's all according to preference."

"Can it. You just don't want to tell him he sucks at cooking, you kiss ass."

"...."

"......"

They were starting at each other. Felix, daring Dimitri to say anything in argument and the other, wide eyes at Felix's blunt words. Rodrigue couldn't help the snort that came out, then bursting with laughter afterwards. Both broke their eye contact to look over at him and after, Dimitri soon joined him.

"Stop laughing idiots. It's not funny." Trying hard not to smile, hiding his flush behind his hand.

Rodrigue calmed his laughter long enough to ask, "So you think you can cook better than me?"

"Tch. Obviously. Annette is better than you and she forgets and burns it half the time."

"Well, how about you cook breakfast from now on in the morning? Since I'm so bad." He said jokingly. 

"Whatever. Only on the nights I stay here." He accepted.

Now he'll come down on the mornings he's here, at least long enough to eat with them. Before he would just leave and not say anything. Rodrigue doesn't know what made Felix come in here today but he wasn't going to ask and ruin this moment. 

~~~~~~~~~~

"You know... You really didn't have to scream Sylvain." Annette said with a giggle. 

"Yeah. You almost burst my eardrums." Bernadetta added.

"I had every right to scream." He argued with his clothes on now small flush across his cheeks. "The first of Felix's best friends that I meet in person... And she sees me with a girl on top of me while i'm in nothing but my underwear!" 

Annette stopped giggling but her bright smile remained. "Oh, come on! It wasn't that bad." Bernadetta nodded, agreeing with her.

"If you weren't as understanding, it would be. What kind of boyfriend am I even getting into a situation like this?"

They didn't respond to him. He turned around from his freak out to see them sharing a look to each other. "What did I say?"

Annette spoke to him first, saying "It's nothing. It's just... We didn't know you two were dating. Felix never exactly specified that you were."

"Felix doesn't like talking about romance at all. I guess that's why he didn't tell you." He stood up from his seat. 'Did I not ask him if we were? Have I ever said that I was his boyfriend?' He started pacing a bit. 'I just assumed from what we were doing that it was pretty obvious.' He raised his head, eyes shut, eyebrows creasing. 'Then again, this IS Felix we're talking about.'

With the pacing around, Annette and Bernadetta were watching him. "Wait." Annette made him stop. "Have you two even talked about it?" He wasn't looking at her. Head turned up.  
She let out a long sigh from the clear no.

"I have to go now. Bernie is needed at the inn. Raphael wants help with making lunch and dinner. It's more busy than normal." Bernadetta added hastily and got her things together. When she got to the door, hand on the knob she spoke, "You should talk to him. To Felix." They said their goodbyes and she went out the door.

Sylvain needs to do his chores now. He's so behind and he can feel his skin beginning to itch thinking about it. He began to get to it before he was stopped in front of the door by the petite girl. She wouldn't move even after he asked her to or said he had duties to get to. 

"Hey. I'm happy I got to meet you but i REALLY have to start soon. I have cooking duty and I also have to-"

"Oh I know and that's why i'm going to help you." She said matter of factly. 

"Thanks but no. Guests aren't allowed in certain areas unless they have permission. And sorry to say, the kitchen is one of those said areas." Maybe that'll get her out of his hair. Felix said she was the most reasonable of his group of school friends (If you include all of his friends it would be Ashe).

She had a sneaky grin form on her face and she pulled out a small card. "Already got permission from Mercie."

"You got your way with her too?" He went to grab the card, shocked that Mercedes allowed two things concerning him so close together. 

She moved the card away from him, preventing him from grabbing it. "Mercie is very giving as long as you compromise. You should take notes."

He flinched. "So i'm guessing you're good friends?"

She crossed her arms and nodded, hip cocking to the side. "She was actually my tutor when I was in middle school and she high school. We have a lot in common."

"That doesn't explain the card. Being good friends with her won't guarantee you getting that."

"Felix got this for me. He called earlier and had her make it for me."

"Felix? How? Why?"

Her smile went to a straight line. She motioned for him to bend down like she was going to tell him a secret. He looked to her confused a moment, then bent down.

"Ow." Only for her hand to chop his head. He jerked back. "What was-"

"He's concerned for you dumb dingus. He called me last night, worried that you're going to collapse from pushing yourself too hard." She scolded him.

He stopped rubbing the place on his head. "He told you that?"

"Please. This is Felix. He said and I quote," She cleared her throat, "He's such a fool he's going to collapse at the worst time and get himself into a bad situation. He can't sit still for... Shoot. When you go, keep him company. And make sure the... Basssket takes a break here and there." 

Her impression was impressive, all things considering. "That sounds more like him." 

"Yeah but," She paused. "I'm pretty sure I heard a sniffle or two in there." She had her forefinger relaxed on her bottom lip, a sudden sad look in her eyes. "I agreed because that's what it sounded like. He always does so much for me, so I wanted to do this."

His eyes widened. "You heard him?" He was hit with guilt again. "Alright. You can stick with me today." He went to go past her still blocking the door when her hand stopped him, landing on his chest. "What now?"

Sad expression gone, fist on the hip that was leaning in, other pointed to the ground. She smiled sweetly "Shoes first."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Felix was dropped off and went inside he seen that they were already preparing for the lunch rush.

Caspar and Ingrid was cleaning the dining area. Caspar gave him a nod as he was walking by. Ingrid, too preoccupied with her cleaning, didn't notice him yet. 

In the back, he set his bag down in the break room. He took his hair down and tied it back up, his bang fringes pulled back as well now in his more, less messy bun. Unzipping his jacket, leaving him in his t-shirt and fitting jeans. Pulling down his personal apron, he then pulled it around his waist after tying the string sitting on his neck.

Going into the kitchen to see Leonie sitting everything in place. He walked up to her, taking one of the boxes she was carrying in from the storage shed. "Ashe out there?" 

She nodded, her side ponytail starting to fall out from the constant back and forth from the building. "Maya's inn is packed. He's expecting us to get hit hard soon. Harder than usual around this time." Felix sat down the crate full of vegetables next to the sink. "He wants you on cutting and prepping today since you're the quickest. I disagree of course but, what the boss wants, the boss gets."

"You disagree?" He questioned. "So the competition we had back here a few weeks ago, which I won by the way and YOU lost, you still disagree?" Going more smug with each word.

"Watch it. You might be a kid, but i'll still teach you manners the hard way if I have to." Speaking as she fixed her ponytail. "Rinse those off while I help him get the rest of the stuff in here."

He didn't speak and started filling the water up in the sink. She smiled and headed back out. He wasn't afraid of her but if he messed with her too much, she'd get him back and with a vengeance too. Not to say they don't get along, on the contrary, she's one person he could get along with a majority of the time.

He was moving the vegetables one at time in the water than pulling them out, drying them and checking if he missed anything. He felt a hand on his shoulder move him over and the person slid in beside him, taking over for the drying. 

"You're a bit more flushed than usual. What's the reason?" Ingrid asked.

"Nothing. Getting ready for rush like always."

"Right, right." She reached up to his shirt and tugged it down a bit.

"What are you doing?" He side eyed her, leaning away.

"Oh nothing. Just thought I seen something on your shirt."

He stopped rinsing and turned to her. "Thought you seen a mark, you mean?" He stopped her by grabbing the towel from her to get her attention. "What were you going to do if you found one? Tell father?"

"Wha- what do you mean?"

"You wanna know what happened the last time you told him?" He squeezed his fists at his sides.

She looked away.

He scoffed out "You already know. Then why are you still going off and telling him my business?"

"Because he is your father Felix!" She snapped. She jumped from her outburst. "Please.. All of us are worried." She said quietly. "I didn't mean for that to happen. I didn't think he'd react that way."

"What? You didn't think he'd compare the two? Like he does with Glenn and me?"

She flinched again. "I-" She turned her head up. "I just wanted to help. You're so distant anymore. The only thing you want to talk about is Sylvain but we can't talk to you about him because it upsets you and you just end up storming away."

"Did you think that maybe I don't want to where you guys always say nasty things. It's disgusting the words about him that come out of your mouths."

"But Margrave says-" She stopped her words at his expression full of hatred. 

"That's the thing now isn't it? You would rather believe a man that let what happened to him happen. A man that goes to see him just to screw up Sylvains progress and put him back at square one. The asshole that doesn't even care enough about him to help Sylvain once he gets out!"

She was shook up with mixed emotions but recovered to say "That may be, but your relationship it's.." She trailed off and looked the other way. 

"Seriously Ingrid? You're going to go there?"

She looked at him questioningly.

"My relationship with him is nothing compared to you." Venom in his tone.

"Don't you dare." She let out shakily.

"The one you want to be with, he's got a bigger age gap with you than Sylvain does with me, you hypocrite. And what's worse.." Her whole body was shaking now. "That man is nothing but a corpse now." He left the kitchen and went out to the shed to help Ashe and Leonie, not seeing the tears begin to form in pools of green.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sylvain was nervous for nothing it seems. Annette turned out to be a decent help with the cleaning and getting things ready for lunch. She almost tripped a few times carrying what they needed but other than that, he doesn't mind if she helps more often.

Currently checking the food in the oven and soup overhead, he heard her singing a song which tune sounded awfully familiar as she was decorating the sugar cookies for the sweet dessert for after. He paused to listen to the lyrics. 

"~Gift that's still yet to be. I don't mind~"

They were very.. Cutesy. Not exactly what he was expecting. Especially since on the nights Felix stays, he sometimes would hum the songs that Annette has made up due to him being drowsy. Sylvain has asked for him to sing but Felix always refused. He can understand why now.

"That's a very cute song Annette. You ever thought of talking to a record company? The lyrics and tune are pretty good."

"Eeeep! What!? No. No way! I couldn't possibly. They're just for fun." She flailed around and at the end, her very red cheeks were resting in her hands. "Besides, you're just trying to flatter me."

"I'm really not. I've heard Felix hum the tune to a few of your songs before to himself when he's about to fall asleep. It's precious." He stirred the contents of the pot to draw less attention to her embarrassment. "The cute songs aren't even his thing but if he likes yours enough to do that, they're good enough. Trust me, he's picky when it comes to music."

He turned after he heard her laugh airily. She shook her head a little. "Of course you say the same thing he does." She then said something under he breath but he didn't catch it. He was about to get back to the comfortable atmosphere before she asked a question,"It's a bit odd but, can I ask something?"

"Shoot."

"Has he told you what's been bothering him lately?" She asked apprehensively.

"He's supposed to tell me something today but I don't know what it's about. Why?" He replied normally. 

"It's just- it's been a while since he said he'd tell you is all..." her face fell.

"Something has been bothering him that long?" Sylvain felt uneasy. "What is it about?"

She lowered her head. "I don't think it's my place to say. I shouldn't know about it myself if i'm being honest." She then looked at him determinedly. "I do know however that you should do what you're supposed to. Tell Mercie about your problems." She finished the sugar cookies and put the used dishes in the sink. "I'll be right back. I have to make a call." Sylvain watched her leave before turning back to his own food, lost in his thoughts. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They were all recovering from the rush. Leonie was cleaning up in the back, Caspar and Ashe were in the dining area straightening up and Felix was taking over for any stragglers that came in after. Ingrid though, he wasn't sure. After the rush she cleaned her side rather swiftly and went to the break room.

Felix knew why. He went too far and he felt regret bubbling up in his stomach. He always threw Glenn in her face when they started arguing about Sylvain. She was most definitely crying right now. Felix wanted to apologize before she left. He motioned for Ashe to come over.

Ashe was rubbing his hands down with a towel after washing his hands. "What's wrong Felix?" He had a pin pushing back his side bangs.

"Nothing. I just have to say something to Ingrid before she leaves for the day."

"Oh. Yes of course. Go ahead." He took over and Felix went to the back.

When he walked in, Ingrid was already getting ready to leave, shutting her own locker. They made eye contact and she broke it almost immediately, walking past him.

"Ingrid." He heard her footsteps pause behind him. "I um.. I wanted to say s-sorry. I shouldn't have.." He got quiet as he went. He wanted to hurt himself for not being able to say it properly. He thought she was going to keep walking until he felt the familiar pressure on his shoulder. 

He went to look towards her but she put her other hand on his opposite shoulder to keep him facing her way. "I-it-" She cleared her throat to get rid of the knot. "It's okay Felix. I overstepped my boundaries. I shouldn't get involved. I'm just concerned is all."

"I don't think you shouldn't be involved. I think you should make your own choices in whether or not Sylvain is unstable. Margrave.. He's lying. I don't want Sylvain to lose the ones he cares about because they want to believe something an abusive ass says." He kept a calm, steady voice somehow.

"Maybe you're right. If he was as bad as Margrave is saying, then Dimitri wouldn't be going today."

"Wait. You know he's going?"

"Yes. He called this morning. He seemed excited." She chuckled. "I wanted to tell you I was going to tag along but then the fight happened." She said sadly.

"I see." He said, matching her tone. She finally let him turn to face her.

"I'm going to meet you guys there. I'll see with my own eyes. Besides, if you haven't given up on him, I believe we'll be okay and he'll get through this. We're going to be there this time, I promise." She said assuredly. She dropped her arms and waved back to him before leaving. 

He got back to relieve Ashe from his job when Ashe told him to go ahead and take lunch since it's going to pick up again in about 2 hours.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Once Annette got out of earshot from the kitchen she asked Mercie if she could let her borrow her office. Once inside she called Lysithia. 

*"Hello?"*

"Hey! How's it going Lysithia? Feeling better?"

*"You know as well as I do that I was fine. I just didn't want to go."*

"Yes, yes. Because you'll tell Sylvain what's going on. You have to hear this." She blabbed on happily.

*"What?"*

"Sylvain called himself Felix's boyfriend."

Her bored voice picked up in sneaky interest. *"Did he now?"* Annette heard her villainous laugh even though she tried to hide it.*"I'll have to call him then. Also.."* There was rummaging on the other line. *"I guess i'll stop by too. I seen your text."* she went serious again. *"Felix told me last month he was going to tell Sylvain what was going on. Time to get involved. It's only getting worse."*

Annette slumped unhappily, almost teary she responded. "Yeah. It's that bad now isn't it?"

*"Not quite, but if nothing changes it's going to be."*

"Do you thin-" Her phone started ringing. "I have to take this. See you later?"

*"Yes. Bye."*

"Bye... Hey Felix! How's work?" She asked with a chipper voice. 

*"Not as good as your day is by that sound. Is everything okay?"*

"Of course. Sylvain is entertaining." She chuckled out.

*"I bet he is. Don't hold his immaturity against him."*

"Eh? No way. He was actually rather polite."She heard him click his tongue, showing he didn't believe her. She closed her eyes thinking a fraction of a second. Should she? Or should she wait and let Lysithia?

....... Nah. She's going to do it now. Teasing Felix and him reacting is always a treat. She'd ask Ashe to send some pictures later. She put the phone on speaker and texted him to let him know to get his phone ready.

"What are you doing right now Felix?"

*"Getting lunch ready for my break."* She heard the sound of a knife cutting through something and the clack of it being stopped from hitting the cutting board. PERFECT.

"Anyone around?" At the quick no she responded, "Great! Haha. That means I can tell you what Sylvain said." He hmm'd to let her know he was still listening. She grinned "He called himself your boyfriend."

The cutting abruptly stopped. And she had to check if they were still on call from the length of silence that stretched on. She took the speaker off and put it back to her ear. "Felix?" She whispered.

*"....."*

"Did I break you?" The cutting started up again but slightly faster pace than before.

*"He was just joking."* He forced out.

"No. He said it a few times. Sounded pretty serious to me." Putting her hand to her mouth to hide her laugh. "So that's one less thing you have to fret over at least."

She heard him choke up a bit. *"I wasn't fretting over it."*

"Yeah. Sure, sure. I just wanted to tell you everything is fine and i'll leave after I make us some tea."

*"Are you sure you- no nevermind."* Best not to go there.*" Thanks for telling me."* He said the last sentence quietly.

"It's no worries. Bye Felix!" She got off the phone and went back to the kitchen to see that Sylvain wasn't there. She did see a note on the counter though. It was Mercedes's handwriting, saying that she took Sylvain to his room to treat the place on his forehead from the other morning.

"Well then, i'll just go ahead and get the tea and snacks ready and go to his room so we can chat more." She pumped her hands determinedly.

!!!~~~~~~~~~~~~~!!!

Mercedes was standing over Sylvain while he was sitting down on his bed for her to reach easier. She pat his head clean and disinfected the area. "It's healing nicely. Soon it'll be all better."

As she was cleaning up, Sylvain watched her and without thinking spoke out, "Mercedes?" She looked back to him when she was walking to the trash bin. "Does Felix ever talk about what happened?"

Her eyes widen a little from the unexpected question. "A little. He doesn't talk about it in detail. He just talks about it when he's tense. It makes him feel better I believe."

He looked down at his hands in his lap, looking over them. "How can he talk about it so easily? I- he- he's the one who suffered the most that day." He felt a knot in his throat. "And yet, here I am getting the help he should be."

Mercedes dropped the items inside thr bin and threw her gloves away before going back to him and after sitting next to him, put a comforting hand on his back. "Oh Sylvain. You mustn't speak that way. You can't compare what you went through. You'll never fully recover that way. You have to quit blaming yourself."

"You don't understand." He stood up. "He was- what happened to him- oh god.." He put his face in his hand covering his face. "I wasn't fast enough to stop it and now he has to live with that for the rest of his life. He almost died and there was so much blood." He looked up to her, she was smiling sadly. "Why are you looking at me like that. Don't pity me."

Her smile dropped into a irritated frown that was gone in an instant. "I'm not. What you said is true. He does have to live with it but.... Let me tell you what he said when I asked him how he deals with it." He raised his head. "He doesn't focus on the bad things. He thinks of what he seen after he woke up."

Sylvain froze. "When he woke up, I was-"

"No. Let me finish. " She said firmly. "He doesn't think of you covered in THAT Sylvain. All he remembers is how happy he was that you were both alive." She stood up and took his hands away from his face hiding his eyes. "He doesn't just block it away like you've been trying to do, instead he talks to someone on his bad days. Trust me. Talking about it will help."

"You're doing this on purpose. Making the waterworks start to lower my guard."

"You don't have to be on guard anymore. You're safe. Felix is safe."

The only reaction she received was him enveloping her in a almost bone crushing hug. He started to lower, losing strength in his legs and she followed him down, patting and rubbing his back. She felt her clothes on her shoulder get wet but let it be until she no longer felt him shaking. 

"Come now. Let's get off the floor." She made her way to stand up, lowering her hand to help him up.

!!!!~~~~~~~~~~~!!!!

"This kettle is taking forever to heat the tea. Maybe it's one of those that don't heat on the outside. Well, it's possible considering the place." Annette shrugged and put the kettle on the pan beside the snacks and made her way to Sylvain's room.

"This thing is heavier than it looks." She huffed out getting to his door. She slid the card to his room somehow without dropping it.

"HEY! I made some te- WoAAHH!!" She slipped, losing her balance, falling on the floor and just watched in horror as the kettle went in the direction of the other two.

~~~~~~~~~~

"What do you think has him all worked up?" Caspar asked standing next to Ashe.

"What?" Ashe was looking at his phone, viewing the text that Annette just sent him saying that he needed to send her a picture of Felix and to be sure to get a good shot of his expression. 

"He's just killing it with that knife." He looked where Caspar was and seen Felix cutting at speed that reminded him of- "Like on master chef right?" Caspar saying out what he was thinking. "Wonder if he'll teach me?" He began copying the motions but albeit, a lot slower than what the black haired boy was.

"What did Annette say to him?" He said to himself as he got closer enough to see the side profile of the others face and seen flushed cheeks that reached his ears. Ashe turned back around to the other teen. "Caspar. Stop before you hit someone!"

~~~~~~~~~~

"I am SO sorry Mercie!" Annette was sitting on the couch in Sylvain's room, watching the blonde woman mop the spilt tea.

"It's alright Annie. We're lucky the tea never heated up. Good thing you forgot to turn the eye on or it's hard to say how bad the burns would've been." She said lightheartedly.

"Yeah. I'm actually happy I was a klutz this time. I would've felt awful if it was hot. But... Did you see how fast he moved!? It was like.... ZOOM!" She acted out by shooting her arm in front of her as fast she could.

"I didn't even notice until after he pulled me down." She agreed. 

When the kettle went flying, Sylvain reacted immediately by pulling Mercedes back down and turned his back toward the object, which in effect led to all the liquid falling onto his head and back. Only leaving very little of it to fall on her. They only thing "bad" that happened was when he started fidgeting from how sticky and dirty he felt after a few minutes of her looking over him to check if he was okay. He raced to take a shower right after.

Said man walked out of his bathroom a few minutes after Mercedes finished picking up all the glass pieces that shattered and sweeped up every spec that she had seen to calm Sylvain down more.

"Uuaahh!! Sylvain really!?" Annette turned away from him still sitting hands blocking her eyes from him walking around just in his underpants. 

"Uh. Annette. You've already seen me in nothing but this already. Why are you acting like that?" He commented while getting a shirt and pants out of his closet.

"Can't I at least act like I still have my eye virginity?" She asked putting her hand daintily on her chest.

He chuckled a little from that. "By all means." He bowed to her dramatically. "If that makes my lady feel better then we shall act as if it never happened." She giggled at him. 

He put his pants on. He got his shirt and put it on. He smoothed the front down, then paused. Rubbed it down again. And again, and again before he took his hands off and took the shirt off. Then called to Mercedes outside that he needed an iron. She took her phone out acting like she was scrolling through it, looking up at him with her head down.

He was pacing the room. Holding the shirt and speaking under his breath the same thing over and over again. She gave him what he asked for and once he ironed the shirt, he put it back on, smoothed it down and sighed in relief. 

He seen that she was staring at him. He smiled with a little embarrassment with a wink following. "Wrinkles. They suck right?"

She sat straight. "Totally. Hate when I see them." 'Don't draw attention to it. Act like it's normal. He'll get nervous if you comment on his behavior.' She found herself thinking what Felix told her when they spoke about her coming. It didn't seem that bad until the pacing started. There was actually a set of "rules that Felix gave her as well that she had to do or not do with Sylvain. Which was, well, weird for a better word.

1\. If he asks you to do something a certain way, follow it perfectly.

2\. When you come, make sure your clothes are in perfect order. No Wrinkles, smudges or buttons/zippers out of place.

3\. When (Not if but when) he talks to himself and/or paces back and forth, don't comment on it.

4\. If you see him doing something a few times that you normally wouldn't, DON'T say anything. 

And those are the rules for inside. He's worse when he goes out, which is why they've been allowing Sylvain to go out out a bit more before he was released to calm the symptoms down. She's managed well today so far. When they cooked, she did everything the way he said to. The only setback was the tea incident.

"So um.." She was pulled from her thoughts from him. "Want to watch something? Unless you're taking off soon?" He asked unsurely, rubbing his hand back and forth through his hair.

"Oh! Yes! I would love to watch something." He gave her the remote.

"Awesome. You find something and i'll go and make some more tea." Walked to the door and asked "Any particular flavor you fancy?"

Lysithia was coming soon so, "Sweet-apple please."

"Coming right up." He went to open the door and suddenly he bumped into another person, both letting out a "oomph." He took the other person by the wrist so the smaller figure wouldn't fall. "Woah. You alright there?"

The white haired girl recovered from bumping into the larger before saying "I'm fine. Thanks, Sylvain."

~~~~~~~~~~

Felix sat down with the lunch he made in the break room, face finally cooling down. Ashe came to check on him after he was done cutting his food, saying he was going so fast he thought Felix was going to hurt himself. 

'Damn you Annette.' Thinking while biting into his food. His phone rang again and he sat it on the table, putting it on speaker "What?"

"Wow. Hello to you too grump." The girl's voice said. "And here I thought you'd be in a better mood with the news you just heard." Her attitude melting away to teasing near the end.

"Lysithia. I just now settled down from Annette. Don't need you to get me going again." He sighed weakly.

"Settled down? What do you mean?" She asked with genuine curiosity.

He told her what Ashe had said and that he had to yell at Caspar to stop trying to mimic Felix, which meant Felix also got a stern talking to. As stern as Ashe could get anyway.

By the time he finished, she was gasping for air, laughing so hard. "It's not funny."

He heard her slapping something with her hand, catching her breath. "No. You're right. I'm almost ashamed I didn't get to you first."

"Ugh. Did you just call me to make fun?" Starting to pick at his food.

"Actually no. I wanted to tell you that i'm heading out to see Sylvain and Annette."

"You're feeling good to go out? If you're not, don't push yourself."

"Stop it. I get enough pampering from everyone else. Don't need you doing it too, besides..." She trailed off letting him hear the background noise where she was. He heard the commotion from what appeared to be from Hubert and Ferdinand, yelling at each other. 

"The hell they fussing over this time?"

"They were both being idiots and it caused them to spill Hubert's coffee on Edel's drawing she was going to give Byleth."

He breathed in through his teeth. "Their going to get skinned alive." 

"I know. She spent AGES on it." She was snickering. "They're running around, freaking out. It's humorous." Her voice then got serious. "Cutting this short and getting to the point. Why haven't you told Sylvain yet?"

"I'm getting to-"

"Nu uh. You've been GETTING to it for over a month. It's getting bad Felix. I know you don't want to "burden" or "hinder" his progress but if you don't tell him.. I don't want anything to happen to you." Her voice became saddened.

"I-i'll try to tell him tonight once Ingrid and Dimitri leave." 

"Good. I just wanted to let you know that if you don't tell him, I will. I don't want to do it but I will if I have to. Bye Felix." She hung up before he said anything back, and he sat there, not moving, wondering how he could tell him.

~~~~~~~~~~

Edelgard was sitting at the kitchen table, hands on the drawing, fingers rolling making noise. Ferdinand and Hubert, at the door, was watching.

"This is all your fault Ferdinand. If you hadn't-"

The orange haired boy looked to the other in disbelief. "My fault!? You were the one who-"

"Enough." Her bland tone made them freeze. "Let me think on what i'm going to do to you. I've spent so long on this to give to her."

They fell silent, waiting with bated breath for her punishment to them. And after a few agonizing minutes, her head rose.

"I've decided. Skinning it is."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick ages here.  
> Leonie-post time.  
> Ashe- in between ish. I thought him up being around 19-20 in this.  
> Ingrid,Edel, Ferdinand and Hubert-pre time.
> 
> ~Cookie for you if you find out the song lyrics I used for Annette~


	5. You know...?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is going to be a long, awkward day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a while. Got used to a different schedule only to swith back to the old one. This wait will be closer to how long future updates will be I'm afraid. I'll try to get them out sooner.

The two girls were sitting at the table waiting for Sylvain to get back. He'd been gone for a while. A bit too long just to make tea. Lysithia would usually get a bit impatient from waiting but she thought now would be a perfect time to discuss what they could do to get Sylvain aware that Felix was indeed hiding something from him.

"Annette." She turned to her from the TV. "I think may have an idea on how to tell him. You'll have to work with me though."

Annette looked unsure though. "I don't know. I can see why he hasn't told him."

The white haired girl looked at her in annoyance. "You just agreed before I got here that we should tell him!"

"I know! I know but that was before I seen him take a kettle of hot tea for someone out of instinct."

"It was cold!"

"That's besides the point! We all thought it was hot and he just... With what I seen.. He'd willingly put himself in harms way to protect someone else." She clasped her hands together. "Just with spending this little bit of time with him makes me understand why Felix is struggling to tell him."

Lysithia's anger that was building up simmered down. "I can't say I don't understand why. But Annette, Dimitri's sleepwalking, he's starting to become hostile."

"What!?" Her pigtails swayed from her quick movement. "How bad!? I thought he was just talking to himself or rather, the people he's "talking to". And that when's he's that way" she lowered her eyes, "He calls Felix Glenn if he sees him."

"That's exactly why. He's never recovered from Glenn's passing."

"But Felix told me that Dimitri only talks to him."

"Did he tell you what he says? Or what he's starting to do here the last few weeks?" She leaned back, crossing her arms.

"No." She deflated. "I guess he tells you though."

"Not as much as you would think. I only know what I do because he comes over to stay so much during the week."

"He knows he can come to me too doesn't he? Does he not think I can-"

"Stop right there." She put a hand up. "He doesn't go to your house because of Gilbert and Rodrigue being friends. Nothing to do with you. Gilbert would tell his father where he is."

"I see." She said, feeling a bit less hopeless. "What exactly does he do then?"

"I'll tell you what I know based off the little things he told me and from my own perspective but it might not be conclusive."

The blue eyed girl sat up, preparing herself.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Heya Fefe. How's it going you beautiful, lovely creature?"

Felix let out a long annoyed sigh. "Why do you two always come here my last hour at work to bother me? You're annoying. Go somewhere else and don't call me that."

Claude clutched his clothes close to his heart. "You wound me." 

Yuri next to him answered. "We come because the food is good. Getting you worked up is just a bonus. Dinner and a show I guess you could say." He said smirking. 

"Sit over there and i'll get to you in a minute." He fixed them with a glare.

"Such terrible service, right Claude? I don't see how you get good tips from acting so hateful." He said when Felix came back and gave them the menu.

"Your're so full of shit. You two don't have to pay where you work on the convenience side of the restaurant. You never leave a tip either and if you do it's loose change." He snapped.

"Touche. But how about this, you give us the same service you do with other customers and we'll leave you a big tip?" Claude asked with a half smile.

Felix's eyebrow was twitching but before he could retort, he seen a usual regular up front, making his way to their table they always sit at. "The usual?" At them nodding he wrote it down and placed it in the kitchen for Leonie to get ready. He walked to the person with dirty blonde hair and sat the menu down, putting a more pleasant but fake expression on his face. "How are you Randolph? Your regular today?"

"I'm doing well. Thank you Felix and yes please." Randolph was one of the first became a regular around 6 months ago, a couple months after Felix started working here. He works for his family business and often works overtime. And usually, he's too tired to make himself something so he would come here after. However, he comes in more often than he used to. The days Felix works full shifts, he'll come in for breakfast and then again later. Felix has memorized what he likes when and what days.

Once he put the order in he came back with Randolph's drink and sat across from him at the booth. Leonie would call when the orders are finished. The red eyed man spoke when he sat down. "Looks like you've been running nonstop today. How is everyone?"

~~~~~~~~~~

They were watching Felix and the other from their table closely. Claude trying to seem carefree while Yuri was lightly glaring. 

Yuri spoke "He always comes when Felix is here and the way his eyes follow him... It's offputting."

"Felix is quite the looker. I find myself watching him from time to time when I have nothing to do. You think he's single?" 

"Don't know, don't care. Whiny twinks aren't really my thing."

Claude smirked. "So you're saying you're not attracted to others like yourself- Oow." Yuri kicked him under the table.

"Take this seriously Claude. I wouldn't bring it up if I thought it was normal. Felix acts better with actual customers but he makes it a point to serve this guy perfectly. He doesn't DO that."

"Okay. I get it. Felix is here quite a bit. I agree with you though." He looked at them from the side. "He makes it a priority to be here when Felix is. Should we... Look into it then?"

~~~~~~~~~~

"Sorry for the wait you two. Here you go." Sylvain sat the tray down easy and joined them at the table. Annette started to pour her tea into her cup while Lysithia looked to Sylvain situating himself in his own seat.

With the look she had, she glanced at Annette who just shook her head no, knowing she was going to say, "That was a bit of time. You have trouble?" Annette then once again shook her head but into one of her hands. 

He tensed up before answering "I messed up the icing for the cakes the first time, so I had to remake it."

"It took you almost an hour to make more icing?"

"The cakes."

"What?"Both girls asked at the same time.

Hand on the back of his nape, smiling sheepishly, "I didn't like how it turned out." 

Annette responded to stop Lysithia from telling him it was wasteful. "Oh! Well that makes sense I can see why-"

"Why did you not like it?" She asked.

"I put a bit too much sugar.."

"Look.. I get you want to impress us, but trust me, we wouldn't have cared if the icing was sweeter. Right?" Lysithia looked to Annette and she jumped in surprise. 

Eyes wide from Lysithia not fussing at him Annette spoke, "Right. We actually really like when things are sweeter. So don't worry Sylvain."

Hand down in his lap now he visually relaxes. "If you say so."

"We actually have to tell you something. It's about Felix." At Lysithia and Annette getting intense expressions, Sylvain began tightening up again. 

"What about Felix?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"He's tense." 

"Mmmmh." Claude agreed by them watching Randolph speak to the young waiter, who had his hands in fists within his lap. "What do you think he's saying?"

"I can't tell. I don't have a good view of his lips."

Ashe calls out to Felix, telling him to go out to the building to help stock the food again before he leaves. Felix got up and Randolph grabbed his arm and put money for a tip in his hand and got up himself to leave the restaurant. 

"Perfect. Claude i'll be back." He followed Felix without the other noticing. He knew when it started getting dark out, the employees had to carry pepper spray for defense. He opened the door to the break room a tiny bit to see the black haired teen inside at his locker. He not only grabbed the spray but also, "A taser gun and two hidden knives... So Claude wasn't bullshitting. What's up with that?" Yuri said under his breath. 

~~~~~~~~~

Claude stayed seated at the table, waiting for Yuri to get back. He followed the red eyed fellow out to his car but he didn't do anything strange. 

'Least he didn't follow Felix out like we were thinking he would.' Thinking while taking a drink of his beverage. It had been a few minutes already. Hopefully Yuri didn't surprise Felix too bad and it led to him stabbing him.

He strayed from his thoughts when he seen Dimitri walk in, looking around. He grinned and got up. "Well, well. What brings you here?"

~~~~~~~~

Felix made it to the building with the supplies and it seemed like he wasn't followed. He started putting together all the items on the list Ashe gave him. He heard a thump behind him and froze in place. He felt for his knife and when he felt the hand on his shoulder, he reacted fast and slammed the intruder into the wall, knife to their throat. His eyes glared harder after seeing who it was.

"The hell are you doing?"

"Just checking to see if you really did carry all the stuff you do. Why? Isn't the spray enough?" Are you scared a big bad wolf is going to get you?" He laughed mockingly. Amber eyes looked down, then back up.

He felt the arm across his chest push down harder, Felix was sneering at him and he answered, "I brought just enough. If someone is determined enough, a little bit of spray and electricity won't stop them. The knifes are a fail safe." He slammed up against him one more time before pulling away and turning around and getting his things.

"For that one then?" He was rubbing where it was beginning to become sore on his chest.

Without turning around he answered. "Has nothing to do with him. That's... Not your business. Butt out."

~~~~~~~~~

"So you're here to pick up Fefe yes? What's the occasion for?" Claude asked with his head propped up on his fist.

"Fefe? I didn't know you two were close enough for nicknames? But yes, We're going to go see Sylvain. Rodrigue was called in last minute so i'll be driving."

'Sylvain?' "He acts like he doesn't like it but he does. Allow me to ask, this Sylvain, who is he exactly?" Dimitri tilted his head in question, "Fefe doesn't talk about his private life much here, but he does say that name on occasion." It was a complete utter lie but, Claude was curious. 

And sweet, innocent, gullible Dimitri always delivers. "Oh I see!" He smiled. "Slyvain is a childhood friend of ours but him and Felix have gotten a lot closer as of late."

"Hmm, hmm. Is that right? Why don't you tell me mor-"

"Claude!" Dimitri jumped at the sudden noise but Claude stayed relaxed in his side of the booth. Felix stomped to them, uneasy look on his face. "What are you doing?"

"I'm here to pick you up. Rodrigue got-"

"I don't care. What are you doing here right now? Couldn't you just wait in the car?"

"I was thirsty. I figured I'd come in and get something while waiting for your shift to end however, Claude sat here and we've been talking."

"We've been talking about Sylvain." Claude looked to him, searching for a reaction. Felix somehow kept his face neutral. Claude's eyes filled with disappointment with a lack of what he was wanting. 

"Is that right?" His face still blank but unable to keep annoyance out of his voice he faced Dimitri again. "You shouldn't talk about him to this idiot. He'll try to use what he knows as bribery." Dimitri seemed confused.

"You cut me deep Felix. I would never."

"You know you would you sneaky bastard." Crossing his arms and glaring.

The green eyed boy chuckled. "You and I both know you're way more tricky than I am." He looked at Felix through his eyelashes.

His insides jumped. "What was that you son of a-"

"Felix." Dimitri got firm. "That's very rude. You're supposed to serve customers, not insult them." Claude grinned getting the blonde to defend him.

Having enough, he turned away. "I'll get you a stupid drink. Don't talk to him anymore about Slyvain."

Dimitri slumped while sighing. "Very well." 

"Aww. I wanted to know more about our mystery dude."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Felix had his hoodie and bag on and left the break room. When he reached Dimitri, he pulled him away from Claude and Yuri by his shirt. Dimitri didn't pull back but did make a comment on Felix stretching his clothes. They got to the car and Felix let go and went to the passenger side. "Hurry up. I want to get to the house and take a shower first." Getting into the car.

Dimitri smoothed his shirt down, hard look on his face from being pulled around, then got in and started driving to the house. He glanced over to Felix. "Ingrid said she would meet us at the house." Still looking at his lap he grunted to let him know he heard. "She sounds like she's nervous. She asked what she should wear."

"Just tell her something comfortable and clean. And yes, by clean I also mean no food or grease stains."

Blue eyes squinted in amusement before he laughed a little. "She won't be happy to hear that she can't stress eat beforehand."

"She can. Just tell her to change her clothes after. One little spec and Sylvain will see it." He sighed out.

"Will he get mad?"

He heard a scoff. "No. But it'll bug the shit out of him and where he's like he is, he won't say anything."

"I see." 

~~~~~~~~~~

Sylvain sat, going through all the information the two had given him. Everything kept running through his head. Over and over and over again. He was brought back by a small hand put on top of his that was on the table, and another separate hand cautiously taking his other hand away from pulling his hair. Annette, the one who had her hand on his spoke "Don't beat yourself up over it. It's not your fault."

"What she's saying is true. We only wanted to tell you so you would know and maybe you could talk some sense into him as well." Keeping his hand from going back into his hair.

"Why didn't he just tell me? Is it because he couldn't rely on me?"

"No. He doesn't want to hinder your progress." Lysithia answered. "Or cause your lack of."

"Lysithia. Maybe you shouldn't say anymore." Annette added. "He needs time to take all this in."

He got up and moved to the keyboard, running his hands over the keys, not looking at them. "I don't want you two to take this the wrong way but, could you go? I have to be alone right now."

"Absolutely! No hard feelings whatsoever. Come on Sithia." She started pulling the white haired girl along.

She let the other girl lead her until they were almost out the door, then stopped and turned to him. "I don't know if you want it or not but i'm giving you my advice." She waited till he tilted his head up a little. "Show him that he can count on you with his burdens. He's been taking care of you fot a long time now, to the point he has put it in his head he can't be vulnerable for your sake... Don't you think it's time for you to take care of him now too?" She then shut the door behind her.

He sat down. Elbows on his knees, hands covering his face. "The best way to handle this.."

~~~~~~~~~~

"Are you sure about this? If Felix finds out that we're doing this he'll end up hating us for good." Ingrid said sitting at the kitchen counter. 

She arrived shortly after Felix left to take a shower. Both her and Dimitri was waiting now.

"We have to. It's for the best. Rodrigue asked us to do this. For Margrave and Felix's safety. If you don't want to do it then I advise you to not come."

"All i'm trying to say is that Felix wholeheartedly believes that Margrave is in the wrong, that Sylvain is doing better. I just.. I don't want to do this if he is."

"I can't believe you." Dimitri's voice went low. "You heard what state Miklan was in after Sylvain was done with him. If you and Felix think that someone can "get better" from that, you're diluting yourselfs."

"Felix wouldn't waste his time with all this if Sylvain wasn't improving. I told you what he said today right?"

"He will do anything to show Sylvain is innocent. He believes he is even after watching what happened. You would take his word?"

"That's not-" They heard the door to the bathroom open and stopped.

"We'll speak more on this later." He whispered harshly to her. She nodded, eyes to the floor, hand moving to her chest.

~~~~~~~~~~

"There you are Felix. We were wondering why you-" Marianne stopped seeing two new faces with him. "I see Sylvain is having even more visitors today. He's going to be absolutely exhausted once everyone leaves." Saying while smiling.

"Yeah, well, he's seems to be quite popular here lately."

The two behind him looked around the somewhat small, but cozy building. If it weren't for the sign on the building and the desk up front, it wouldn't seem like a facility at all. 

"What's he doing right now? When did Annette and Lysithia leave?" Him walking to the light blue haired woman. 

"They left about two hours ago. He was reading the last time Linhart checked on him. He said he seemed to be quite engrossed in whatever he was reading." She said in her light voice. "Mercedes wanted me to tell you that she would be with you to discuss his schedule for next week after she was done with her current patient."

Felix nodded. "Thanks Marianne." They followed him to through the building until he stopped at one of the doors. Felix slid the card and put his hand on the knob before stopping, leaning in. He looked over his head at the two behind him. "Don't say anything when we go in and be as quiet as possible."

They looked to each other. He was serious in tone and voice but the hint of a smile was forming confused them. When the door was opened, they heard music playing. Sylvain was occupied with stopping every little bit to fix something on the sheet next to him. They sat down, Felix on the bed while Ingrid and Dimitri sat at the table.

After around fifteen minutes of waiting, Sylvain stopped playing and rubbed his temples with his thumb and forefinger. "I can't focus at all."

"Looked like you were almost on to something." Felix spoke to him.

"Yeah. I had something but I lost it."

"You're overthinking. Is it from Annette and Lysithia coming over? I know they can be exhausting after awhile."

"Nah. Just the chapter I read is making it hard to come up with something sweet and fluffy for the game."

I don't want to pull it from you but you have two more here to see you."

"Hmm." He lifted his head from his fingers and seen the two at the table. And instantly Felix knew Sylvain wasn't happy to see them from how dark his eyes went. And he spoke blandly. "It's odd to see you two here. I don't think i've seen you in... Almost 4 years now. Damn. Time sure does fly doesn't it." He smiled but, it was the one Felix hated. The smile with nothing behind it but bitterness and negativity.

"It sure has hasn't it?" Dimitri, of course not picking up on it, was the first to respond. Ingrid, who did see how Sylvain was, stayed in her place at the table while Dimitri got up and reduced some distance. 

He settled his hand on one of Sylvain's shoulders. "I almost don't even recognize you. I thought being in here, you would be smaller but you've been taking care of yourself. That's great!"

"You're wrong there." He laughed out breathlessly. "If it wasn't for Felix, i'd be nothing but skin, bone and nothing else. He takes care of me and everything involving me."

Blonde eyebrow raised, "Surely you would've got out of it on your own eventually. With Felix's blunt and hateful mannerisms, i'm a little surprised to see how well you're holding up. For him to be so committed in this is surprising since he's been quitting everything here lately except his job." Ingrid in the back trying to get Dimitri to stop prodding but not heard from Sylvain hearing static and having tunnel vision and feeling his body getting hot. Then after managing to calm himself he heard Dimitri speak again. "I'm sure he's told you he's also given up on joining the force along with Rodrigue and me. He didn't go to the assessments with me. Rodrigue is quite disappointed and where he won't listen, he's hoping me asking you will get him to change his mind and stop being so ridiculous and stubborn."

"Dimitri. Stop. We're here to see Sylvain. Let's just have a nice conversation please." Ingrid border line begging. 

Crimson hair swishing slightly from turning to look in Felix's direction, he seen him not looking at them, still sitting on the bed, knees staring to move up and into his body. He didn't want to hear this while here. Lysithia said that's all he hears everywhere except here with him. Stretching his back he then let out what he knew what to do. Dimitri wanted to pick and dig at Felix? Sylvain knows exactly where to hit where it hurt.

"Haha. You're right. Being in the force sounds like the dream job compared to what he's ACTUALLY interested in." He stood up from the seat and leaned back on the wall, arms behind his head." I mean why care about the people that accidents involved in that screws them up mentally and or physically, When you can just shoot and kill the bad guy instead and there we go, all done, i'm a hero."

"Sylvain, that's enough." Felix got up and got in front of him, pushing him away to create some distance. Ingrid trying the same with the other. 

Dimitri looked at him, getting angry. "You would know that shoot and kill the bad guy doesn't work wouldn't you Sylvain? After all, look where you've been the last 4 years." Gesturing the room with his hands. "The only thing you've got to show for it is this. And the only thing to make you feel better is Felix laying with you!"

"Hmm. Is that how you think?" He gently took the younger ones wrists and held them. "Honestly I feel like I have to correct you. Firstly, I didn't shoot Miklan. That garbage didn't deserve getting shot and dying instantly. No, he deserved every swing of that axe he got-"

"Sylvain!"

"And the whole laying thing. You sound disgusted by the thought but," He looked down seeing Felix digging his fingers into his shirt. A twisted smile grew with each word coming out. "We all know you wish it was your bed he was in instead of mine right?"

Dimitri's glare intensified before going away completely, eyes now wide and looking over the other two instead of looking right into Sylvain's. "He's been lying."

"What?" Sylvain and Felix let out.

"Margrave has been lying. You haven't attacked me. I even brought up Felix in a bad manner." He swallowed, then cleared his throat,looking down. "Everything he's been feeding to us is untrue." Ingrid moved to his side once she knew it was all over. He bowed, "Forgive me. I didn't mean anything I said. It was to test you to see if you would do what he said you would."

"You... Were testing me?....." He closed his eyes and sighed out. "You really need to find a better way to do these things, but I get it. I thought that's what you were doing. You've never been good at acting but you've gotten better." 

"Wait.. You two were play fighting!? Seriously!? Do you really think this is the time!?" Ingrid said loudly, foot tapping, getting angrier by the second. Felix was shaking, not saying anything. He pulled away from Sylvain and got to the blonde, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him out of the room, slamming the door. Ingrid watched the door long enough to hear Dimitri complaining about Felix stretching his shirt then turned her gaze to Sylvain.

He was looking in the place Felix had his hands in his shirt and he asked to no one, "Has his hands always shook that much?" 

"No, he only does it when he starts getting stressed or worried about something." She leaned on the wall next to him. "You two are ridiculous. Acting like that, even though you haven't seen each other for so long." He looked down to her. "I honestly couldn't tell you which of his reactions are worse, the staying quiet and shaking that he just did, or when we were younger and he would bawl his eyes out because you two would "fight" each other."

"I didn't think he would do it the minute he seen me again. With the shit my dad has spewed to you guys, I'm surprised you even have the sense to come." Crossing his arms, getting more comfortable, he continued, "And throwing all the things up that Felix is uncomfortable with is not cool either. You knowing what he was going to do and acting like you didn't was pretty awful as well."

She shook her head at him. "I knew he was going to bring the topic up, not do it the way he did. Me trying to stop him was genuine. I'm just as revolted with the way he went about it too. Also," She gave him a stern stare, "You weren't much better. You didn't have to say those things."

"Tch. He made a stab at Felix, it was a... Instinctual reaction. Probably shouldn't have brought up the old crush he used to have. That was a bit much."

"A bit?" She added sarcastically. She let out a loud exhale. "Are you worried?"

"Um. About what?"

She rose an eyebrow, giving him the look that she thought he was a dumbass. "After you brought it up, Felix literally drug him out of the room. Aren't you nervous that they could do something or do you trust him that much?"

"Oh! that?" He waved his hand. "Not at all. Felix wouldn't do that besides...." He had a hopeless smile on his face. "Those weren't bedroom eyes. Hope Dimitri can keep up or it's gonna suck for him."

She moved her hand under her chin, elbow resting on her other arm. "What are you saying?"

~~~~~~~~~~

Patients and nurses alike were looking at the spectacle passing by them in wonder and alarm. Felix paying no mind, pacing to the gym area in rage, still pulling the others shirt in a devastating grip. Dimitri, behind him, being pulled was stumbling trying to keep up, one hand on Felix's wrist. 

"Felix? What?-"

"Be quiet." He shut his mouth and let himself be led.

They made it to the door and once inside, Felix slung his body in front of him, Dimitri catching himself before he fell to the floor. "What in god's name-" He stopped and looked around. "Oh my! They have a gym here? It's small but it has a good amount of things here. They even have a mat. Is it for stretching and yoga?" He said while looking down at the floor. He decided to look back when there wasn't an answer to see Felix had threw off his jacket and was now taking his socks and shoes off. "What are yo-"

"You have fifteen seconds to tell me why in the FUCK you thought that was a good idea." He said through his teeth, getting up and starting to loosen up his body, then lessening the distance between the two.

"I don't-"

"10, 9-"

"Felix. Now wait a minute. I don't think this is the best way to-" His head narrowly dodged getting hit by the knuckles aimed for it. "Are you serio-" They were moving around the room, Felix barely missing from connecting his hits. "Felix! Please stop and give me a moment!"

~~~~~~~~~

Marianne came and got the clipboard back from Sylvain. "Thank you. I'll be sure to get this to Mercedes. You didn't have much trouble picking your schedule did you?"

Both him and Ingrid were now sitting on the couch to be more situated. Dimitri and Felix had been gone for almost 45 minutes, and during that time Sylvain was asked to fill out his schedule for next week for his therapy. Now they were waiting for the other two too return.

The long silence was starting to make Ingrid finicky and nervous so she made conversation about what Sylvain picked. "You still ride horses? I didn't think that Margrave allowed you to go out."

"Oh yeah, every Wednesday I go to the Edmund ranch with Marianne and any others that want to go."

"Are people allowed to go with you?"

"No. Just patients here. Felix would go otherwise."

She gave a weird look, "But Felix is scared of Horses. He always has been."

"That wouldn't stop him from going and trying and you know it."

"Yeah." She chuckled into her fist. "I guess you're right." The door opened and an Dimitri, who was barely able to stay on his feet, came in, Felix on his tail. Both looked winded, breathing deep and hard, a sheen of sweat covering both. "Do I even want to ask what you two have been doing?" Dimitri laid down in the floor while Felix stayed standing, looking down in what looked to be disappointment.

Still gasping for breath Dimitri let out, "I have to start practicing my hand to hand more. Felix almost killed me."

"I hope you did your assessment better than what you did in there or you definitely flunked."

He sat up to look at Felix better. "You have to understand, not everyone fights as well as you do. You were harder to fight than the one that did that part."

"If that's true, it's very sad to see how far the force has fallen in that. Ugh, I feel disgusting. I need another shower and it's your fault." He said to the one in the floor, now noticing how unkempt he looked.

"My fault!? Why I-"

"You're taking a shower?" Slyvain cut him off. "Mind if I join?" Winking at the end.

Felix stopped at the door, bag in his hand, looking over his shoulder, he let out a simple "no" and went in. He's mad at him too.... Great. Can't wait for that.

Sylvain pouted a bit before fixing Dimitri a smug grin. "He rocked your shit didn't he?"

"I don't think that's the language I would use but yes." He answered with a sigh.

Arms crossed Ingrid joined in, "You deserved it for doing what you did. And I hope he gets you too Sylvain. No sense in acting the way you two did." At her words they deflated and settled into silence, all silently agreeing to wait until the other got out.

~~~~~~~~~~

After everything that happened, once Felix got out, they sat around and put a game on the table to pass time to be on the safe side. Talking about their plans and asking what everyone has been up to. 

If Ingrid was still playing softball, if Dimitri thought he passed his test and was ready to be captain. Sadly, their time together was cut short when Mercedes came to get them when they had to go. 

Ingrid pulled Felix into a reluctant hug (only to him), but then hesitated when she went to Sylvain. When he saw said hesitation, he enveloped her and picked her up off her feet again from the force. "Hey don't be a stranger, yeah? Come back whenever you want. You too Dimitri."

They left and Felix took his note and text book and sat on the bed, lifting his knees to rest them on. Sylvain, testing the waters, sat behind him slowly, each leg on the other side of the younger between him. At no reaction, he got comfortable.He let felix do his work and remained quiet, eventually wrapping his arms around his waist, resting his chin on his shoulder, eyes taking in everything he was doing. 

Quickly getting bored, he moved back a bit and pulled black hair down from being tied back and falling down to Felix's mid back. He grabbed the brush from the bedside drawer and started brushing from the bottom up, avoiding tangling and pulling his hair too much. 

Once he finished his whole head, he ran his fingers through, putting the slightest pressure to his scalp, massaging where he knew would feel the best. At the relaxed exhale, he smiled and continued down to the shoulders. He parted Felix's hair to one side and leaned in to kiss his nape.

"Quit trying to kiss up. It's not going to work." The one in front huffed out, continuing to focus most of his attention to his studies.

"I'm not kissing up. Just trying to show affection."

"Tch."

"Are you still mad at me with what I said? I thought you got all your frustration out by beating Dimitri up. Besides, I honestly didn't think he was joking at first...." 

Felix looked back to him, "What do you think would have happened if it became more than a disagreement!? What if it got physical Sylvain!? You would've had more issues getting out of here! Did you EVEN think of the consequences!? No! You didn't! You just wanted to mark your territory and show that you were boss, because you still think-" He stopped himself and turned back around. "I don't have time to get worked back up over this. Just... Wait until i'm done and we'll discuss this more."

Sylvain laughed with a breath. "Sure. Like we always do right?" 

Felix turned enough to look at him from the side. "What are you talking about?"

"Always the "We'll talk later." Or "Tomorrow." Or "Soon." We never do. You act like i'm irresponsible and acting childish. Yet you're the one holding secrets from me!"

"I- I don't- I don't know what you're talking about."

"Is that right? When were you gonna tell me that you and Rodrigue fight so bad that some nights you have to stay with Lysithia?" Felix's body leaned forward in a slump, shoulders rising, tension coming back. "And what about Dimitri? That his sleepwalking is causing you to suffer?"

Silence. 

He pulled him close, arms wrapped around his shoulders. "PLEASE. Let me help you. If not me, someone else. I don't care who. As long as you're safe." 

He felt hands taking hold of his arms around the front, Head leaning onto him. "I can't... Not yet. Give me time."

"Felix." He held on a bit tighter before responding. "Okay. You have to tell me everything when I get out then. Deal?" Felix tapped his arms and when he loosened, he turned around fully on his knees, still between the red heads legs.

Amber met honey and Felix answered. "Deal." Sylvain sighed in relief and pulled him back into his embrace, arms wrapped around him as well. He fell back, Felix's head on his chest while he continued to run his fingers through black, soft hair.

~~~~~~~~

For a long time they were quiet, Sylvain almost thought that Felix had fell asleep, until he felt him stir and moved until he could look up at him. "You're never this quiet unless you're thinking about something."

"Maybe I just want to enjoy this." Sylvain smiled. "I'm wore out. All the people today was great, don't get me wrong but, i'm exhausted."

"Is that so? I guess you want relaxation. You most likely need help too." 

"Hah? I don't know what you- woah-wait. What are you doING!?" Felix moving his hand up and down his covered crotch. He took a few panting breaths. "I didn't think you were going to be in the mood for this. Aren't you still mad at me?" Grabbing the youngers arm but not stopping him.

"Have to release the tension somehow." Bluntly said as he continued, gaining some pressure from the reaction Sylvain was giving him. "Do you not want to?"

"Of course I want to. It's just, Linhart has already swapped the sheets."

"Then I guess I better get all of it then, shouldn't I?" That lower, seductive voice made all the reluctance in him vanish. Felix went back to what he was doing when he seen the uncertainty leave Sylvain's eyes.

He felt his pants being slid down, so he lifted his hips to help Felix get them down and off. After his underwear went as well, he dropped his head to the pillow and breathed out at the kisses and small nips around his thighs. Hands grasped both thighs and held in a firm hold and he felt the kisses and nips turn into biting and sucking. 'Shit, he's gonna leave spots.' He put a fist up, hovering over his mouth, shaky breathing in anticipation for what was going to happen next.

"Oh Fe." He whispered when he felt the slick line go up the underside slowly before a kiss at the tip and the circle around after. His other hand that was clutching the sheets went to run through Felix's hair, then rested on it. "Fuck." The licks were driving him crazy, making him unhinged but, he kept his hips still, waiting for when Felix was ready. He knew it was coming when the hands on his thighs clutched hard. He bit on his fist when his cock was surrounded by wet heat.

His hand at his mouth then quickly went down to black hair, mimicking the hand already on Felix. When Felix started bobbing up and down, he moved his hair from his face and watched him take it all over and over again. He was getting hotter, flush taking over his face at seeing the amber eyes fluttering closed, enjoying what he was doing to the other. Why does he enjoy this so much? Well, even with no answer, he's not complaining.

At the hum coming from his mouth Sylvain tensed. "Holy shit. You're so good at this." The flinch of fingers on him made him continue. "You're amazing. I could watch you suck me off all day if you'd let me." He heard the moan after feeling it around his dick. "Felix. How can someone look so gorgeous doing something so filthy?" One of the hands on his legs moved under Felix to stroke at himself. The vibrations came more frequently after that. He was close, so close. Felix was mercilessly going up and down and his tongue was going over the places it would feel the best. The only thing Sylvain could do is moan, and pant out Felix's name and praise him, barely remembering to breathe. 

The second hand on his thigh moved to one of Sylvain's resting on Felix's hair. He took his mouth off his cock and the cold air made him shiver before looking at Felix. His eyes glossy, tears at the side for deep throating him so long, cheeks flushed a tad. The hand on top of his own grabbed tighter, amber eyes communicating before Felix went back down on him, only over the tip, he pushed his hand down a little before moving it entirely off of Sylvain's and put it back on his upper thigh.

He pushed all the hair from the others face again and took a firm hold and started thrusting up at a steady, deep and slow pace. "Oh damn." The feeling of him hitting the back of Felix's throat was messing him up in all the right ways. Felix moaned louder, stroking himself while his mouth was getting fucked. "I'm gonna cum. Fe- hah. Ah." Shivers from the body on top of him let him know Felix had got off and he then himself felt the orgasm come from himself. He almost screamed at the swallowing feeling around his cock, Felix getting every last bit like he always does. Licking around the sensitive organ, getting the bit that went past his lips.

~~~~~~~~~~

They cleaned up and got dressed again, then Sylvain pulled Felix back to laying on top of him, stroking his hair. Oh wait! He almost forgot. "He Fe?"

"Mmm?" Felix was moving his hand up and down Sylvain's arm, relaxing in the afterglow of their activity.

"Bernadetta wanted to ask if you would go to the con next month with us."

"I'm going."

"Well- it's well I-" Just get it out. "She wants you to cosplay with us." 

"I know Sylvain. She already asked me and I agreed."

"I know it's not your thing bu- huh? She already asked?"

"Yes? How else can she get the oufits ready in time if she doesn't ask early?" He looked up to see Sylvain with a blank look in his eyes and surprise on his face that changed straight to defeat. Whispering how she's only been around them for a few months and how could she have been tainted already before looking up at nothing.

"..... You know Felix?.... All your friends are super mean."

"The hell are you talking about?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yuri and Claude are of course pre age. These two will end up being seen quite a bit here soon. Thanks for reading and feedback is appreciated.


	6. Working out some tension

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This was... Well... Not what I was going for at first but it worked out I guess. I didn't mean for it to get a little spicy there in the middle but it did and i'm sorry, I couldn't help myself. 
> 
> *Is this mine or Sylvain's POV?*
> 
> I'm not telling. :/

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some backstory again so please be mindful of some referenced abuse and it also gets a "tad" sexual here. So if any of this makes you uncomfortable, tread cautiously. I don't want to make anyone more uncomfortable as it should be (which it is going to get bad anyway the farther we get into the story). I try to make some comedy in this story but I have the humor of a cardboard box so... I apologize i'm putting you through that as well. But on the plus side, PROCESS! with sylvix talking it out. Not the most graceful way but... Felix is a tough nut to crack.

"Hmm... This looks like it would fit him.. What do you think?" Ingrid turned to the two men next to her, holding a pair of jeans and t-shirt with a cardigan laying over her shoulder.

One was looking at them in deep concentration, trying to picture the clothes on the one she was asking about, the other had his fingers digging into his temples in frustration. They had been in this store all morning looking for a good set of clothes for Sylvain. 

Ingrid asked her brothers to assist her so her and Sylvain could take a walk outside the clinic and she knew the red head would feel like he stood out in his all white ensemble that he had to wear inside said clinic. They agreed after she swore up and down she would be safe with him. The problem now though.... Was finding an outfit that would work.

She had never been one for clothes shopping. She knew what her friends liked to wear and the style she has herself is quite presentable,(normal jeans, shirt with usually a cardigan or a denim jacket that was half length.) It's just... What did Sylvain like now? Was he still the attention seeking kind? With bright colors and clothes that stand out, or is he more into darker colors and somewhat more on the safe side like Felix wears?

She was holding two shirts that were the same style but slightly different tones of crimson, face tight in tension when her eldest brother groaned. "Will you just pick? I doubt he'll even care what it is as long as it fits." Dirty blonde hair being ruffled up by him moving his hands back through it.

"Hey now, be nice! She hasn't hung out with him in a long time. Her wanting him more at ease is very kind of her and really, you could learn from her." The middle sibling looked back to her. "But I do agree with him. Sylvain will like whatever you get for him." He laughed from his throat, "As long as it matches." Ingrid returned with a tight smile, still struggling. His laugh left him. "Why don't you ask one of the workers here? I bet one of them will know what to do."

She turned back to him, nervously responding, "I don't want to bother anybody so- Hey! Stop don't- Ugh! There he goes." He walked away from her in mid sentence, seeing someone with a workers vest on who looked perfect for said question. He was talking to the brown headed girl and Ingrid spoke under her breath. "I can't believe him. Just stay over there and don't bring her over- oh my god he's bringing her over here. Help me please." Her older brother sighed.

The worker came up to them and her curly brown hair bounced slightly with each step, her ankle boots over her dark form fitting jeans clicked with each step. Upon getting closer she spoke, "Hello! What are you having trouble with sweetie?" Her green eyes fixated on Ingrid now. "Your brother here said you were shopping for someone but you didn't know the best thing for them. If it's alright with you I can help. Do you have a picture of them? That'll help immensely!" 

"Well, we'll leave you to it then. Gonna get some breakfast. See you in about forty five Ingy." Her brothers tailed it out. They didn't even want to be here, the jerks!

The girl got closer and Ingrid remembered what she asked her.  
"Umm. Well-" This girl didn't know boundaries at all. It made Ingrid nervous and this girls perfume was dulling her senses even further, making it harder to think. 'She smells nice.' Her random thought made her panic and she slide away a fraction, yanking her phone out of her back pocket.

She scrolled through her pictures that she took yesterday to find a good picture of his face. After an awkward minute she found one that showed his face well enough. It was one that she took without Felix and Sylvain noticing. They were sitting next to each other at the table, faces turned to look at one another, a look of adoration from Sylvain and Felix as well, but to see that gentle expression was so rare to see from Felix, she couldn't help herself and snapped a few. (He'd get so mad if he found these.)She tapped the phone to zoom on Sylvain, Felix out of view now.

"Here. This is him. I don't exactly know what to get him. I'm assuming he's not really wanting to draw attention but, it's just.." She trailed off when the girl took her phone to look at him. 

Her green eyes widened, "Oh honey... I'm afraid that no matter WHAT he wears he's gonna stand out. I mean-" She laughed.

'She sounds like a bell when she laughs.' Her thoughts zoning out what the girl was saying.Ingrid looked at her closer. Her forest green shirt looked a little small for her but it could just be her bust size. Necklace the same color as her eyes. She looked slightly lower and then mentally punched herself for being so rude. She looked back up and emerald eyes were looking at her expectantly. 'Dammit! What did she say?'

She giggled again at Ingrid's confusion. "I said that with his fire hair, he'd stand out either way, but i'm guessing you want to get him something that helps blend him in better right?"

"Oh! Um. Yes! Exactly. Which color do you think?" She held up the two colors. The girls arm went under her breast, the opposite put a thumb under her chin. Looking at her again, her nametag said "Dorothea" written in beautiful cursive.

"Well Ingy, i'd say to get this one." She pointed to the darker of the two. "That way it might help with less attention grabbing." She smiled. "He's quite the looker, getting these for a SPECIAL occasion?" She asked with a small wiggle to her eyebrows.

She chuckled. Something about Dorothea reminds her of Sylvain with her personality. "No. Just taking a walk and maybe ride horses later. I wanted something nice but comfy. To put him at ease." Smiling at the outfit, remembering when they were younger.

"I see. That's nice of you." Dorothea focusing more on the picture, but when she turned back to her, she perked back up. "I'm sorry. It's just... He looks familiar. How old is he?"

"He's nineteen. You couldn't possibly recognize him. He went to Garreg Mach High. He was homeschooled in sophomore year. So you must have him mistaken for-"

"His name. Is it Sylvain Gautier?" Eyebrows now focused, shaking a little waiting for her answer. 

Ingrid's blood froze over. How does this person know him? She confirmed that it was. "How do you know him?"

"Ah! I went to school with him. High school at least. Our freshman year he wouldn't stop badgering me to go out with him." Her eyes tightened at the memory. 

"Of course he did." Ingrid scoffed. Looking at her, she did indeed look like the kind of girl Sylvain would chase back a few years ago. 'Philandering idiot.'

"I put him in his place and after that he just badgered me to be friends. After a few attempts from him, we became inseparable." She was smiling now, arms lightly resting crossing over one another. "It hurt... When he stopped showing up for school. He's really one of the only ones I got along with in that school. Eventually they told us that he was homeschooled. No matter how much I called or texted him, he never answered." She had a disheartening frown now speaking to herself. "I was afraid. I knew what was going on at his home and yet he made me promise not to tell."

Ingrid asked on the verge of anger, "You knew?" He told someone he barely knew instead of her or Dimitri or even Felix!? Why!? 

"I only knew because of the way he acted. He never told me himself until after I told him he couldn't hide it from me anymore. The way he was reminded me of myself before I was taken and adopted. He spent most of his free time with me at my home." She looked at the picture again.

"But why did he stay with you?" He could've come to any of us is what she wanted to say but, at that time, everyone looked up to Miklan and only thought Sylvain got hurt from roughhousing and when they went out to hunt. Sylvain even said so too.

She looked back up to a thoughtful expression looking ar her own green eyes. "I guess it's easier to open up to someone when they know what you've been through by experiencing something similar themselves. Also... I believe it's hard when you have to tell people important to you and you know that they'll worry because of your struggles, especially if they have them themselves, so it's best to act like nothing is wrong."

'Is that really the reason?' 

"Hey..." Ingrid looked up from her thought to Dorothea's voice. "Is it possible for me to see him? It doesn't have to be right away. And if you don't want me to, I understand. Just.. Let me know how he's doing." She held up her own phone in her other hand. The statement had more of a questioning tone behind it. Her face was showing a vulnerability that Ingrid couldn't say no to.

"W-what time do you get off today?" She took Dorothea's phone and started to put her number in.

"Pardon?" 

"When you get off, we can meet somewhere. I'll bring him with me." She gave her phone back after the curly haired girl recovered and put her own number in Ingrid's phone.

"Really? You're sure?" She was failing at masking her excitement, grabbing one of Ingrid's hand in both of hers. "I would love to. I get off at three. If you don't mind, I know a lovely cafe we can meet up."

"Of course. Is it a good, clean place?" She hoped she didn't sound rude asking that. "I don't mea-"

"He still picky about where he eats, huh?" She asked fondly. "Don't worry. It's good. He'll like it." Ingrid smiled back in relief, and at that moment Dorothea looked back to her hands. "Oh right! I should ring you up now. Or are you looking for more?"

"No. This is all." Heels clacking on the hard tile floor with low tapping of the worn shoes behind them, they headed toward the counter.

~~~~~~~~

Sylvain had lost count how many times his ass or his back has hit the floor in the last hour. Felix was clearly not over what happened last night with Dimitri. He was relentless this morning. Leaving hardly any openings, and if Sylvain had any he'd exploit them so bad that in the next moment he'd be right back on the floor again. He's thankful that he at least had some cushion from the mat.

"Get up. I know you can fight better than that." The voice had a faint edge of exhaustion at the end, a small pant every other word. "You want to pick fights? You should get better. Dimitri can beat me at times if he's serious, so you need to be able to back up your words when you want to run your mouth." The bitterness oozing from his lips showing he was more crass than he let on last night. 

"I already told you that it was a joke Fe! I know I can fight better but, you're not exactly going easy today." Getting up and rubbing the place his fall was the worst. "I mean, I wasn't but he was and he took my words as such too. So it was no harm."

"I don't care if HE was joking or not. You would've got your ass kicked if he thought you were. You can't get distracted by your emotions and let them get the better of you." He walked to the water bottles he brought on the floor, picking one up and drinking from it. "You have to learn to control yourself. Are you even listening?"

Wide clueless eyes was looking at him. He huffed out, "This is what i'm talking about, you idiot. Pay attention to what's going on around you."

Eyes returning to normal, he shook his head, "You tell me not to get distracted..." His expression fell. Right when Felix started to feel his nerves start to build up, guilt in his throat, Sylvain gestured to him, "But then you wear stuff like that!" Looking offended. 

"What?" Eyes narrowed down, "What's wrong with this?"

"Are you kidding? One hand one his head in disbelief. "There's no way I could- no, scratch that- anyone could not get distracted with you like that."

"Sylvain, it's only workout clothes.." Should he worry about this? He's only wearing a sleeveless shirt and half pants.

"I know. It's mysterious how you can make the simplest of things so attractive." Winking with a playful smile attached.

'Seriously?' "You're ridiculous. What could possibly be so attractive as being sweaty and panting like dog?" Rolling his eyes.

He turned back glaring when Sylvain laughed. "That's what i'm trying to tell you. You're absolutely gorgeous." 

Felix felt his ears go hot. He turned away again, putting the cap back on his water bottle. "Why are you acting like this so early? It's not even eight yet. Insatiable dog." He started putting his things back into his bag.

"I'd act like this all the time if you'd let me. Can't I praise or compliment you? Someone as amazing as you deserves it."

"Amazing?" He scoffed out with a hidden smile, "Must've been hitting you harder than I thought." 

Arms wrapped around him from behind. "It's true. You do so many things for me." He started to rub their cheeks together, teasing. He wriggled out of Sylvain's arms. "You're an idiot."

He paced to the door, unlocking it. He turned the knob and cracked it only for it to shut again. A hand was on the door, holding the door shut. Arm level with his head, he felt the heat from Sylvain hovering behind him.

"How can anyone not get distracted by the way you look when you're like this?" He leaned closer, kissing at Felix's neck. Lips touching skin when he spoke again. "Hair messed up. Flushed face from all the movement." His hand moved down from the the door to lay on top of Felix's on the knob, locking it once again before moving the smaller hand away and placing it on the door.

He moved his hand back up the pale arm, slowly, goosbumps following behind until he reached the fabric on Felix's shoulder. "Showing off your lean, muscular body." He licked from his neck to his jaw before leaving a kiss again.

He shivered. "Wh-what are you doing? I'm all sweaty and gross. Now is not the time for this."

"Can't I admire you a bit? Indulge me please? I promise you'll enjoy it."He was quiet for a long minute, Sylvain waited for his response.

"...Do what you want. I don't care." Still facing the door, relieved it wasn't something negative that affected Sylvain.

He was brought back from his thoughts from a finger trailing softly from his shoulder to his nape. And when it reached the middle, followed his spine slowly while the voice behind him pulled him in. 

"Such a pretty little arch here and it looks even better when you try to bend away from the touch- trying to hide how you feel. Almost like you don't want to feel good if someone else is the one doing it." Little nips at his ears came and made him gasp and flinch away.

Sylvain followed him, left hand already settled on his waist pulling him back, continuing to trail his other hand across his back to his other side, grabbing firm.

"Sylvain. This is weird. Just let me take over." He didn't like how he sounded so unsure saying that. Sylvain wasn't acting normal today. He never instigates anything sexual, it's always been Felix. He has never refused Felix coming onto him but he's never-

Sylvain swooned however from the rare, bashful nature. "Weird? Why is that?" He moved him back so he could feel his half-hard member. No response came from the one sandwiched between him and the door, so he continued, "You have just the right amount of curve to hold onto."

He continued to rock their bodies until he heard a shaky inhale and Felix relaxed his fists palm first on the door, moaning and followed Sylvains rhythm with his hips. 'This might not be too bad. Sylvain will just stop if he gets uncomfortable.'

"There you go Fe, just feel this and let me take over." He stepped closer, moving a hand and turned Felix's head sideways. Fingers resting on his chin, watching the goosebumps trail down his body anywhere he touched. He licked his lips and spoke clearly, "Open your eyes." 

He gave Felix a few seconds and when he opened them, he looked and glanced away every little bit, unable to hold the gaze. He moved in with a content sigh, his lips grazing slightly against the other pair of lips, slowing down his grinding to focus more on his words. "Look at where we are and you're letting me do this to you."

He felt the small tremble of lips against his before Felix answered. "D-does it matter? The door is -ahh- locked."

"Hmm.. True. But that doesn't mean that Hanneman, Manuela or Flyan won't just unlock it also," he pulled him closer when he tried to slide away, "You're not exactly being all that quiet sweetheart." He moved the youngers chin up to lap at his neck again.Felix bit his lip to try to control the sounds coming from his mouth. He has to focus his attention to something else to gain his composure back or he'll.. 

"You're mo-outh is going to dry out with all the salt your ingesting." He tried to be insulting but it must not of from the chuckle near his ear.

"Oh Felix. It's nothing I'm not used to."

"The h-heahh-hell does that mean?"

"Don't take it the wrong way but well... When you first started cooking you -ah- had a tendency to go a bit hard on the salt."

He was burning from mixed embarrassment and also from the hard cock grinding on the back of his thighs. "You ass-" He reared his head back and missed from Sylvain knowing it was coming. He felt one of Sylvains hands move up and under his shirt and when he reached a nipple, he pinched.

He couldn't stop the squeak in time. Sylvain began rolling it around between his fingers. "Do you always have to fight and take charge?" Felix's breathing only becoming more and more unsteady. Sylvain stepped back long enough to throw his shirt over his head and then pushed the body in front of him even closer to the door, and his heat pushing harder against Felix, causing him to whimper.

Sylvain didn't want to take it too far in here but once Felix laid his cheek on the door,tension leaving his body for the pleasure to take over, whimpers and moans coming out every other thrust forward, he stopped thinking. "Felix." He sighed out, moving closer. 

~~~~~~~~~~

Ingrid had the clothes in the bag and was waiting outside on the bench in front of the store. She hoped Sylvain would be okay with this. She asked ahead of time to spend the day with Sylvain outside. Mercedes happily agreed and said she could do whatever, as long as it didn't overwhelm him. And that sounded all well and good it's just....

"Overwhelmed?" She whispered to herself. "Since when has Sylvain been overwhelmed?" Of course she understands that people change and she hasn't seen him much at all the last few years but in the past, he was the one who made people uncomfortable.

The first she can remember was when she was six or maybe seven. He had flirted with her granny and it wasn't exactly... The cute flirty ways a child would flirt. No... He straight up came onto her like a full blown adult. She remembers being offput, angry even. Granny handled it well and it was settled down quickly and never happened again.

She couldn't understand back then why her granny was worried instead of angry. She spoke to her separately that night, asking what Ingrid knew of Sylvains home life and how he acted around his family. Now though..... She completely gets why.. She'll never know or understand how he felt or what he went through.

"Ah." She wiped her face when she felt a drop on the back of her hand in her lap. "What am I doing, getting emotional in public like this?" She waited until her older brother's car pulled up and slid into the backseat, heading to the clinic.

~~~~~~~~

"Ahh! Sylvain!..." Felix had come already and was getting worked up again. After he came from Sylvain's insistent thrusting. It was embarrassing to come from just the friction on his ass and his pants confining his dick but he couldn't stop now. If he did stop what was happening, Sylvain might not ever have the courage to do this again. And it's not like he DIDN'T want this. He's BEEN wanting this. Almost been begging for this to happen.

Only Felix's pants and his own were separating thier cocks. He had Felix facing him now, back against the door. His right hand was holding a leg out to the side under the bend of his knee, left squeezing at his ass.

The sounds coming from Felix were being muffled from his hand over his mouth, eyes glassy. His other hand was tangled in Sylvain's hair, pushing and pulling, not knowing if he wanted Sylvain to keep going or to stop paying attention to the peck he was latched on from overstimulation.

"Sylv- aain. I caah- can't take much more." The lazy, careless pace Sylvain once had changed a bit ago into consistent slow grinding and the hand on his ass grabbing at random thrusts keeping him unable to know when it was coming.

Not stopping what he was doing, Sylvain glanced over to the clock on the wall. At the pace their going Felix will end up being late. He doesn't really want to speed up when they're deep into the middle of intimacy like this. Sylvain enjoys taking as long as possible but he also knows that Felix would hate being late or miss work. He lowered the leg he'd been holding up, settling Felix by keeping a hold of his waist, helping him balance. 

"Sylvain..? What are you doing?" Being asked in a daze.

"C'mon. We need to get into a better position." Somehow able to keep his voice steady and calm, even though his insides were churning and emotions tangled in an absolute knot.

"What do you want me to do?" Oh gods above save him from the way his lover was being.

'Don't lose focus now. Almost there.' "Uh... Just put your hands... Here." Placing smaller hands around his nape. "Good job Fe. Now hold there real good while I.." He picked Felix up from the back of his thighs and instinctively Felix legs wrapped around Sylvain. Most of his body weight was leaning against the door behind him.

Sylvain moved one of his hands up to push black hair behind pink ears, strands damp from sweat. Felix finally leaned fully back and let his legs loosen, giving Sylvain full control, hands now laying on the bend of the others arms. "That's it." His hand drifted back and brought Felix into the crook of his neck. He leaned his own head down onto Felix's shoulder facing him. He inhaled and exhaled slowly, pulling Felix in with the hand on his nape and the other arm wrapped around his lower back, then increased his tempo.

Felix's nails dug into Sylvain's forearm, speaking with surprise mixed in with lustful gasps. "Wait- no.. Ahhah. T-the do-oor!"

"What about it?" He asked paying more attention to Felix's body. Biting and kissing anywhere he was able to reach while still staying close.

He knew what was going to be said but right now he just wanted to be a little mean and have Felix force it out between his rough breathing. "Y-you're sha-aking the door. St-top."

Sylvain chuckled teasingly. "You are so cute." Lifting his head he moved in to connect lips with yet he felt fingers stop him, hand in his hair pulling him away.

Felix's eyes were narrowed and but not as focused. "Seriously Sylvain. Move away from the door. The last thing we need is someone seeing it moving the way it is and telling." Saying the words clearly however, the harsh breathing still present.

Taken aback he stuttered, "R-right. I'm sorry. Where do you..-"

"Anywhere but the door." 

"No problem. Hold on." Legs and arms tightening around him and getting the go ahead from Felix, he stepped back and looked around the room, deducing which place would be better.....

....

He can't decide..

Shit! He didn't think this through. He wanted to take over but just picking a place is too nerve wracking. He's taking too long. He's gonna kill the mood.

Or at least that's what he thought. He was spinning around, looking at every possible place that could work but he would back out because, 'What if it didn't feel any good to Felix? What if that place wasn't good enough? What if he didn't like-'

Felix spoke up when he somehow got to the middle of the room, his turning jerking him around. "Stop panicking. Just sit down here." Despite his calm, assuring tone, Sylvain jumped, hot breath on his ear sending blood racing back down to his loin. It must have took longer than expected to compose himself because Felix let out a small, "Please."He sat down so fast he almost fell back. He was stopped by hands on each shoulder, pulling him into a fevered kiss.

After the shock wore off, he wrapped his arms back around Felix's waist, learning the pace that the other was going on their kiss. The hands on his shoulders moved to his hair, keeping him close.He was trying to keep up but, the tongue dancing around his was making him feel feint. Everytime he would pull back to catch his breath, Felix would chase him and start back again. Eventually, he lost his balance and had to move his hands behind him to hold them both from falling to the floor.

Normally Sylvain led when they kissed like this. He liked to keep it slow, clean and honestly, not so overwhelming for Felix with anything more than that however.... With the tongue going across the ridge of his mouth so enthusiastically, desperately even. He's beginning to question whose sake he was doing it for.

The slow rolling Felix was doing on top of him, the saliva beginning to run down from the edge of his mouth and Felix not even caring to flick his tongue over to catch it and bring it back in. The shock felt like lightning through his body, eyes open fully.

Feeling honey eyes on him, Felix opened his and looked through his lashes up at him. He was as red as his hair, eyes half-lidded watching Felix. He would have made fun if it wasn't for being occupied. Would he understand after this? That he doesn't have to hold back, to always pull away when he started to get too rough? That what happened back then.. Is past him now? It wouldn't even bother him. Still worrying over something like that.. Such a Sylvain thing to do. Isn't what he's doing a good hint that he can do whatever he wants to him and he'd take it with no argument whatsoever? Sylvain was the only one- the only one who-

Wetness sliding down his face started slow, one at a time until it was flowing. He stopped and rested his head down on Sylvain's, foreheads touching. "Felix? What's wrong?" Nothing but sincerity and care in his voice. He can't take it anymore. The wall he's managed to build, it might as well just be paper when it comes to the one sitting under him.

"As long as it's you.." His thumbs running over flushed cheeks on each side. Sylvain didn't ask but Felix answered, watching his eyes have the questioning gleam in them. "If it's you, it doesn't feel wrong." He tried to pull their faces closer, voice lowering. "I don't feel disgusting, filthy.." Each word coming out more rough than the last, tears trailing down. "The absolute battle to fight the urge to rake and claw at my skin until every last inch is scraped off of it."

"Felix you're not-"

"No matter how many times I clean or wash up, I still feel so sick and unclean! And I'm- I don't-" his pitch raising and lowering in his confession, unable to stop the words. He left Sylvain's lap and sat on his knees in front of him. "And even with me trying to fix things, I just fuck it up and i'm unable to help you the way I should because I- I can't do anything! I've learned to fight. To protect myself. I can control my emotions in situations most people couldn't yet I still can't do what you need me too! I'm still so weak..." finishing off with a whisper. He was rubbing his eyelids, attempting to stop crying.

"No Felix. You're not a fuck up at all. Please don't think that way." He sat up from his leaning posture. His own eyes felt like smoke was blowing in them from the burn in them. Was this what Felix has kept in this whole time? What Sylvain has asked him to talk about? When he suddenly gets quiet and won't tell him what he's thinking about? All the heartwrenching faces he's caught Felix with?

"I AM! You ruined your life for me! Sacrificed everything! And I can't even fix my weak thoughts long enough to do the same for you!"

Sylvain now was now on his knees too, hands hovering around Felix but not touching. Everytime he would try his hands would get pushed or slapped away. "But you do so much for me. I don't know why you would ever think that-"

"I'm useless.. worthless. You could've been in college by now, a well known musician or knowing you, even both. Instead you wasted all your hard work. All your talent.." 'For someone undeserving like me.' He was talking low, almost whispering. He hung his head. "After all that. All you went through. And I... I still freeze up even thinking about what happened. I'm so weak, so undeserving for what you did for me." He took a big uneven, shaking breath. "You should have just let him kill me after he was done with m-" Felix's shoulders were pushed back rough enough to jar him. He let out a wheezing gasp from the fast reaction from the older teen.

He looked back up to meet gazes and almost froze in place. Honey eyes seething in rage, hands on his shoulders shaking. And when Sylvain opened his mouth to speak, his blood ran cold from the unfamiliar tone.

"Don't you EVER say that again." He forced out gratingly. "I did NOT ruin my life. I finally fought back to someone that hurt me for years. I don't want to take it back. AT ALL. The ONLY thing I regret is not getting to you in time to stop him in time." Speaking assuredly. "He deserves worse than what he got. If I could, I'd-" Getting choked up on his words by his emotions bubbling over, "I'd find a way to bring him back and do what I did as many times as I could! Over and over!" His sight was bleary, his knees shaking in his vision. "If I was with you that time... You wouldn't have been-" His eyelids slammed closed, tears forcefully pushed out and down his face, "If I wasn't such an idiot! I made plans with you but instead I- I-" 

'I only thought of myself.' Ringing and echoing in his head. "I left you alone. I LET you be alone. While I was off screwing around and not caring about anything except numbing MY pain. And it led to you getting-" His inhale was trembling and rough, he somehow made himself look up to see Felix looking at him, attention undividedly on him and nothing else. Eyes rimmed red and puffy from trying to rub the tears away, stray ones still rolling down at times. Sylvain was livid at himself.

"Even now." He reached out slowly with one hand, using his thumb to wipe a wet drop away, hand staying on the damp cheek. "Even now, i'm putting my feelings above yours and it's not right. This whole time you've been taking responsibility and not only shouldering your weight but mine too and I just let you. It's not right." His other hand pulled Felix closer by his upper arm. His hold was barely considered a hold with how gentle he was being, as if Felix's body would shatter like porcelain if he put too much pressure on him. He laid his head on the small shoulder. "I'm so sorry Felix.. So so sorry."

~~~~~~~~~

"Ingrid... Don't you think you should slow down on the eating?" Her eldest brother asked while looking at her through the mirror back at her.

"I don't think she's listening. She's lost in thought." They looked to each other. She was eating in a way that they knew she was stressed about something. What was she so worried about? She was fine up until they left her.

'An old friend.' She thought, chewing her breakfast burrito, half tasting it. She was on her third one now and tasted this one less than the last. Super irritating since she loved enjoying her food. She almost wanted to stop, but if she did, her brothers would definitely ask whats wrong. So she kept eating. 'What a waste...'

~~~~~~~~

Felix lifted his arms to pull Sylvain in. Both silent, listening to the other breathing and once steady Felix replied. "I never once thought you selfish. That night after we fought and I had to spend my time at the festival without you, I think I was the childish one. You only left me by myself because of what I did. It's not like you left me in a back alley somewhere. I was around people yet I still went with him."

"Felix. You went with him because you didn't want him to find me. Even after I was so mean to you, you knew where I was and yet... You didn't tell him. And you couldn't get away because I hurt you before that."

"I was being a pest. You had every right to get harsh."

"No I didn't. I had no right to push you and cause you to sprain an ankle, which led to you not being able to run away when you needed to."

"You still came for me." Said so surely. 

Sylvain scoffed at himself. "Yeah, after you had some other kid come find me. Gotta say it was surprising seeing some kid i've never met before running down Thea's street screaming my name and handling me your ribbon that I got you to tie your hair back with." He looked up and out the window, recalling that night. Layered, light hair that almost shined in the moonlight. "For them to use to name we used for Miklan. It terrified me when they said that he had you." 

If it wasn't for them, Sylvain would have lost one of the only people who still cared about him. He has to thank them one day if he ever meets them again. He looked back to Felix, who was lost in thought, hand touching the light colored tie in his hair. No longer the old red one he had before Miklan. Once a minute passed, the hand slowly fell back into Felix's lap. "I don't think I got their name, but it's hard to remember. I can't recall most of that night." His eyes went down to his lap as well. "Just the motions."

His memory was a big black hole of nothing. All he remembers is trying to run, failing and getting caught, then waking up to Sylvain crying tearfully over him and him pulling him into a hug that was so tight that he felt like he was going to be crushed. Sylvain wouldn't tell them what happened, so when they asked Felix who was unable to, they put the case on a "hold" until one of them could or would (In Sylvain's case)

The force eventually settled on a self defense but with the way the scene looked, they were skeptical, some saying it was planned murder.Which is why Sylvain had to tell the story soon. If Felix could, he would just tell them the story himself up to the point he apparently passed out from his experience and Sylvain could take over after. He wishes he could somehow get Sylvain uninvolved but when he himself is the one who committed the "murder" it makes things difficult.

"-Y....-Ey... Hey.... Felix..?" He looked up to honey eyes turned whiskey from the morning sunlight through the window. Warm and inviting. "You okay? Don't try to force yourself to remember alright?"

"Mmm." He nodded once. Probably for the best. If he starts acting up in front of Sylvain, it might stump his progress. Too much vulnerability will cause him to clam up all over and once thay happens, it could take days to get him back on track. 'Have to stay strong.. Just a little... Longer..' He mentally psyched himself up before leaning into Sylvain again. "Put that aside for now."

"Huh?" Sylvain answered by leaning back a bit, putting weight back onto to floor behind him. Felix pulled him back with his hands returning to his nape.

"You still haven't-" His hands were pulled off and was held by his wrist by larger hands. "What are you doing?" He asked after freezing from Sylvain's reflex. 

Sylvain smiled at him softly, "We should go take a shower first. You still have to go to work." At the pout (which Felix would deny since he "doesn't pout") Sylvain braced for the-

"I can call in." Hands still being held, Felix moved his head closer, lidded eyes. This happened every morning he stayed the night. "Ashe would actually be relieved if I did since I push the limits of high school workers." His almost red lips from their almost endless kissing from earlier were tempting, touching just a hair to Sylvain's.

He swiftly pulled back, laughing fondly. "You say that now. But once the rush leaves you're going to be mad that I let you."

"No I won't." That voice, that face, those eyes.. 

Why is doing the right thing so hard? But Sylvain swore he was going to be better so... He let go of the small wrists and wrapped one of his arms around Felix's middle and used his other arm to push up and once on his knees he grabbed the two shirts that were on the floor next to them. He placed them in Felix's hands and rose to his feet.

"No, no. We have to get you ready for work. You have a little over an hour and I know you like to take your time getting ready. I'll make you something while you're getting ready."

"But Sylvain-"

"Uh uh. I know you want to get me off but it can wait. If you really feel that strongly about it, you can get me in the shower but we can't waste anymore time in here." He gave Felix enough time to put his shirt back on before opening the door walking down the hall to his room.

"You make a deal over people hearing me but don't think at all to carry me down the hall, both of us looking like we just had sex and you not wearing a shirt, risking them seeing us instead." Felix's pouty voice in his shoulder, his blush heating up Sylvain's shoulder.

Sylvain rubbed his cheek on the top of black hair responding, "I have to teach you about actual dirty talk. It was just words I used to work you up." He made it to his door and reached into his pocket for his card, sliding it through. "And besides, you liked it so I went a little farther than necessary." Felix was somehow turning more red by every movement. "And I wasn't being totally honest with you."

Raven hair smacked his face where Felix raised up so fast. "What do you mean?" Eyes glaring but non threatening from the flush covering his face. 

"No one was going to catch us." He walked in and went to his bathroom, laying the blushing one in his arms on the wall to reach up and caressed his face. "Everyone was most likely still in bed or eating in the cafeteria."

He looked down to wider eyes and a open mouth."Then what about-"

"Hanneman, Manuela, and Flayn? Meeting with Seteth. They weren't going to be walking by anytime soon." He smiled teasing. 

Felix turned scarlett from embarrassment along with blush from before, eyes watering now from irritation. "You-you- you absolute incorrigible, insatiable asshole!" He was weakly hitting Sylvain's chest. "Why did you make me think-"

"Cause you are positively adorable when you get into it."

"I hate you."

"No you don't." Sylvain quickly answered right as Felix was saying so. "Let's get that shower now. I'm starting to feel disgusting."

"... Fine."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dorothea is a part time worker at the clothing store Ingrid was at. It's a more "wealthy people" store so she doesn't much care for most of the people shopping there. She actually has another job as well, while also going to college. She's a hard worker guys. I tried to make it seem like Ingrid was having gay panic over gay panic but not realizing what it was. Hope I passed it off well enough. I didn't come up with names for her brothers since they most likely won't be in here much at all if ever again except for mentioning here and there. Thanks for reading and as always feedback is certainly appreciated.


	7. Lazy day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of talking which leads to more secrets. What are you up to Felix? But for now fun time with Ingrid and Sylvain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to say first that I have no idea what other ships i'm going to put in here but, I am going to tease certain ones. Depending on the response i'll give them more or less screen time. I'm trying to give them enough but not so much I veer too far from the story. It's going to be long as is.

Sylvain was getting breakfast ready for him and Felix. He decided on omelettes with all the meats and vegetables that he knew Felix would like, withholding on putting too many vegetables. (He needs to get him into eating more of those).

'He really does get better every time he does it.' Thinking about the shower and what happened during as he's turning over the egg smoothly to avoid ripping or tearing it with the tip of his cheeks pink. After today, they have to wait another week to see each other again. Not that Sylvain doesn't love the phone calls but, where it's a watched facility with the calls being recorded and monitored, they can't exactly talk about some things.

He reached up to rub his jaw, right under his chin. Felix bit him pretty hard once they got going. He didn't break blood, but Sylvain knows he's gonna have to ask Manuela to cover it before Seteth or Mercedes sees. Mercedes will eventually find it anyway but, if he at least ATTEMPTS to cover it, she won't say much. She'll just give him that blood chilling smile with her purple eyes closed, hiding her disappointment in him not being able to keep it in his pants.He let out a long sigh, not looking forward to it.

He finished cleaning up and picked up the tray with their food and made way to the room. He heard his TV on, which meant Felix was out and waiting for him. He noticed Felix's hair as soon as he sat down next to him. It was so- "Wavy."

Amber eyes went to him. "Huh?" He looked to the side and grabbed a small bit of his hair. "Oh, that? I had to blowdry it. Can't go to work with wet hair. It'll be back to being straight in about an hour." Running his fingers through it before returning his hand back to the table to rest his cheek back on it.

"You look like-"

"Don't you dare say I look like Glenn." Of course he was going to say he looks like him. Everyone does. He should be used to it by now.

"I was going to say you look like Fana." Sylvain told him.

"I do?" He asked quietly.

His mother. She doesn't live with them anymore. She moved out sometime after Glenn's death. She asked Felix to come with her but, where she was moving was a bit too far from Sylvain. Perhaps after he graduates, they could move closer to her.

"You do. Not that you don't have some resemblance to Glenn and Rodrigue but, you definitely look more like her." He snorted, "Everyone knows you and Glenn got her attitude."

"What do you mean?" 

Sylvain reached over and pinched his cheek, "You think you got that prickly personality from Rodrique?" He laughed. "No way. Definitely her made over, just her son. How is she by the way?"

"She's fine. I talk to her over the phone and i've been going to her classes with her ever since I quit all my teams." Smacking Sylvain's hands from his cheeks. She's also the one who has been paying all the bills for Sylvain staying here too the last two years, but he'll hold off on telling him that. He took a bite of his omelet to stop himself from saying more.

The older let out a reminiscent sigh after he took a bite of his food. "I remember the first time I flirted with her..." Felix rolled his eyes. "She was so shocked for a minute.. Then she threw a spatula at me." He laughed so joyfully remembering her. "I remember that one time she threw her shoe because she couldn't find anything else small enough, and when it actually managed to hit me she freaked and checked to make sure she didn't hurt me."

Felix finally smiled back at him, "She didn't take any of your shit. All the other women walking around eggshells with you and she didn't hesitate to slam you down everytime."

Sylvain smiled softly, "She was the only one who didn't change how she acted around me. I was a huge ass to everyone most of the time. Rude and uncaring about how I made them feel. I felt that.... It was okay because I was hurting, so it was justified." He shook his head. "I was pretty inconsiderate huh?"

"...... Maybe." Sylvain looked to Felix. "But you know better now. You've been acting better.Isn't that enough? As long as you don't live in the past and only learn from it. Keep recovering and that's all that I want." He said confident.

Honey eyes were wide until he smiled and pulled Felix closer by putting his arms around his shoulders. "Yeah... I can still fix this for the ones who matter the most." He laid his head on top of black, soft hair and they sat in peacful silence.

~~~~~~~~

Ingrid waved to her brothers leaving the lot and went into the clinic. Stopping in front of the desk to check in, "Hi, i'm here to see Sylvain." A small green haired girl looked up and, WOW she looked way too young to be a nurse.

She smiled brightly, "Hmm? Are you Ingrid?" She nodded. "Splendid! Mercedes told me to expect you." She tapped her fingers on the computer in front of her a few times, then reached her hand out, palm up without looking to Ingrid, "Card please?"

She took her wallet out and and fished the card to the clinic out and put it in her hand. She jumped back at how fast the girls hand clinched and pulled the card down. She slid the card through a machine and handed it back. "Here you go!"

Ingrid took it back, looking it over on both sides before asking, "What's different about it now?"

"Oh!" She lifted one hand to her lips, "Forgive me, I should explain." She cleared her throat before continuing, "You are now able to enter not only the clinic, but now you can just bypass the desk here and go right to Sylvain's room or anywhere he's able to." She tilted her head, "I do believe he can go just about anywhere in here except for other patients rooms of course." She giggled.

"Thank you. Is he in there now?" 

The girl rose her eyes up to the ceiling in thought. "He should be now. I think I seen him with two plates leaving the kitchen around perhaps... forty five minutes ago?" She was a bit unsure how long ago it was. "Just go on in and if you can't find him, just wait. He spends a bit of time in there on Sundays after his exercise."

"Alright I will. Thank you again." She walked on to where she remembered Felix leading her and Dimitri and looked at her watch. 'Is Felix still here? It's twenty till ten. I swear if he's skipping or called in i'm gonna-' Her thoughts stopped when she heard a loud ping from her phone. She looked and almost dropped her phone seeing Dorothea's name. She recovered and and read the text.

*Dorothea: Hi Ingy. Can't wait for later! I'm going to send you the address to the cafe in the next message. So excited to see him again but I want to ask you if maybe you could keep it secret? You can still tell him to expect someone but exclude the ME part. And sorry to ask for so much but could you see if he still has his music score binder? If he does, please see if you can bring it. If he still is the same person with his stuff it should be in the drawer beside his bed. But in the second one. Under no circumstance should you open the top one! Don't want to taint your pretty eyes after all ;D*

'A binder with music?' She thought, trying to ignore the last sentence. 'I guess I could think of something.' Putting her phone in her back pocket, ignoring the next message ping, she slid the card and turned the knob.

~~~~~~~

"Hey." Felix opened his eyes, still resting his head on the others shoulder. He let out a "hmm" telling the other he was listening. "Why don't I put your hair up before you go in?"

"Okay." He pretended not to see the small jerk of happiness and smiled hiddenly. He watched Sylvain pull his comb out and he proceeded to sit on the bed, scooted back and pat the place between his legs for Felix to sit. He breathed a small laugh and sat between long legs. "You really like my hair huh?"

Sylvain gently picked it up from underneath and started at the bottom to avoid big tangles and worked his way up. "Always have. It's so soft. When we were younger, and you would get upset and cry on my chest, i'd get that small satisfaction of running my hands down through it." He quickly added, "Not that I liked that you were upset, I just thought that was the only time I could and not have to explain myself."

Felix listened to Sylvain explain and after he stopped and didn't add anymore he spoke, "You don't have to have a reason to touch my hair. You can touch it whenever you want. Just don't make it embarrassing if we're around other people."

Sylvain let out a breath, "Got it." After another minute he reached out, "Your tie?" Felix dropped it into his palm, waiting for Sylvain to put it up but, after his hair wasn't being touched and Sylvain didn't respond to him saying his name, he turned sideways to see him looking down in his hand.

"Something wrong?" The hair in front of his face swayed when Sylvain looked up from the tie.

"What? Oh! Umm. It's nothing just... Has the tie I got you always been this color? I know it's been a looong time since I got it but.." At Felix's confused expression he backtracked, "Sorry. I thought I got you a red one is all." Taking the gray colored ribbon and started putting black hair up and weaving it around until it was in a ponytail.

"You did get me a red one." Felix explained, "I just gave it to the other kid and only assumed you forgot to give it back to me once you got it from him. This is the one he got me when he found me after you and I..." He looked to the side, "Had our fight. He was trying to cheer me up."

"Fuck! I forgot to get it from him!" He put his palm on his face and dragged it down. "After he said what he did, I just took off not even thinking of grabbing it. He must still have it unless he chucked it." He seen Felix start to slouch and moved from behind him to sit beside Felix, sliding his arm down and putting his hand on his hip"It's no worries. Tell you what? How about when the festival comes around again, i'll get you a new one? How does that sound?" What he said worked from the dull leaving from light colored eyes and Felix answering with a nod. "Great!"

Felix suddenly flushed and looked away from him again. He asked in a whisper, "Will we be taking a candle and stay the until the end?" Getting more red with each word.

Sylvain was confused. Candle? Why would they need a- he combusted into an equally as red face after remembering. Facing away he said, "If- if that's what you want. I wouldn't mind at all. I'd be happy to do that with you." Choking up with the overload of how open Felix was being today.

He felt Felix put his hand on his thigh while the other touched his jaw where the mark was starting to bruise. Just the tips of his forefinger and middle finger was touching it. He finally looked to Felix to see amusement dancing in his eyes. "Even if I get the biggest one I can find and we have to sit there all night?"

Without hesitation, "Anything for you."

With a satisfied "Hmph." The hand on his thigh moved to his other cheek and connected his mouth with Felix's. They only had enough time to move their against for a few seconds before a phone went off and a annoyed grunt followed before Felix leaned away and answered his phone. "What?" He listened to the person on the other line. "No I will be there.... I don't go in until ten....I'm on my way..."

"Who was that?" Sylvain asked as he pushed himself up to stand and walked over to grab his bag sitting in a chair by the corner wall.

"I have to go to work now." Throwing his bag over his shoulder. "Ashe just asked me to come in. They're getting pretty busy and he wanted to see if I was available." Avoiding looking at Sylvain.

Felix was lying. No doubt about it. "Who was it really?" Felix hunched his shoulders forward, body curling in on itself. He walked over and stopped around a foot away to leave him some space. "It's okay to tell me. If someone is bothering you I want to know." 

He watched Felix wet his lips and then open his mouth just to close it again. After doing the same thing the third time, he gave up and moved his face to the side. "Whatever it is." Felix followed the voice that cut through silence. "I'll trust you, as long as it's not something that puts you in harms way... You don't have to tell me." He took his hand a spun the tail end of Felix's hair and with a smile he went to the door. "I better go and clean the gym before anyone else uses it. Might not have got TOO frisky but you know."

There was a hold on his wrist, tight but not hurtful. Felix was still staring to the floor but he let out the voice that was stuck in his throat. "I- I can't tell you yet what it is. I'm saving it for after you get out. What I want to do is taxing and it's taking a lot of work to get it pulled off. It won't be as hard now that i've found what i'm looking for. But I promise that i'll tell you everything once it's over." 

After he spat everything out he waited with shut eyes for Sylvain's response. He prayed it was enough to tide him over for now. A thumb rubbing his cheek got him to open his eyes back up. "So you're setting up a surprise for me?" There was nothing but elative curiosity in his question. Of course Sylvain trusts him. Why Felix keeps forgetting that he can't comprehend. He lies to everyone and down the road he started to lie to Sylvain too. 

'Not lying, just withholding the entire truth.' The irony in this way of thinking. Felix didn't know whether to laugh or vomit with the mere hypocrisy of it. "In a way."

Hands cradled his face and raised it for Sylvain to bump their faces together. "I'm looking forward to it." Smooth and soft voice reverberating through the inside of his ears. He was pinched soon after on both cheeks with Sylvain joking out at the next second, "You should get going soon then. Don't want be late." 

~~~~~~~

It took a little longer for Felix to get out the door from Sylvain repeatedly kissing his face playfully, each kiss forming a loud "smack" until the younger one managed to wrestle himself away, punching the older one in the shoulder lightly. Sylvain only laughing at the flush on his cheeks.

At the door he faced Sylvain one last time. "Don't get into any trouble. Do what you're supposed to and listen to everyone, especially Mercedes."

Honey eyes twinkled and Sylvain put his hand on his hips, nodding enthusiastically, "You got it. No problem. But really, shouldn't I be saying that to you?" Asking curiously but the playful twinkle in his eyes vanished, now studying Felix. Waiting for a flinch in Felix's stance.

"What could I be getting into? I do everything that I believe to be the right thing." He shot to the other in the question spoke otherwise. "Someone that can't even remember to put their shoes on without being reminded, telling me to behave." Chuckles from his throat, words reverberating off the walls of the now quiet room. 

The smile Sylvain had was small. He still didn't believe Felix fully but a small smile is better than no smile. "That's true but even if it is the right thing to you, you could end up hurt if i'm not careful and don't pay attention. You can get into quite a bit of trouble on your own if not watched."

Sylvain said it with all good intentions however, Felix's light eyes lowered as well as his voice, the echo from the walls making his words stronger, "Then I guess you better keep your eyes only on me then." He didn't wait for the older ones reaction, leaving and shutting the door behind him.

Sylvain waited until he could no longer hear Felix leaving and finally let his breath out. That was kinda hot. Not gonna deny. "When did he get so seductive? Wait... He just derailed the conversation on me." 'When did get better at it than me?'He shook his head, clearing his thoughts to go and clean up, then look for Manuela.

~~~~~~~

Ingrid entered the room to find it empty. She knocked on the bathroom door, finding no answer. Now is better than never to look. She went to his bedside drawer, opening the second drawer. There was two things, a USB cartridge in a pocket that was in the binder Dorothea was talking about. She pulled it out and looked at the contents. 

She was never that good at reading music. The little bit she knew was only because Sylvain's interest in it, which led to Felix learning it himself to because he used to follow him around, so naturally he figured out how to read it too, to her picking up bits and pieces along the way.

Ingrid turned through the sheets, looking at each ones title. The blonde never knew he wrote so many. Some of them had Dorothea's name on them too. 'They must have wrote music together. Is that why she wanted me to see if he still had them?' She found three with lyrics with them and stopped to read one that looked rather simple to play.

She carefully took it out of the rings and just as carefully sat the binder on the table. Reading the lyrics, she was impressed. Her eyebrow would twitch in annoyance when she made it to certain sentences but the song was good overall. She messaged Dorothea and asked about the USB port and she somehow energetically begged to have him bring it too over text.

After smiling over how cute it was and then once again mentally smacking herself for the awkward thought, she walked over to the guitar on the holder. She picked it up and threw the strap over her shoulder, tuning the wires in place as she walked back to the bed. She sat down on her legs sideways, continuing to tune the instrument unknowingly biting the tip of her tongue.

He makes it look so much easier than it really is. She started and corrected herself so many times she almost gave up until the last time she strung the guitar it made the proper sound. Letting out an excited "Yes!!" She placed the paper right in front of her, propping it up on the binder laying on the bottom frame of the bed.

Clearing her throat a few times and pepping herself up, she began to sing along while playing the notes. Messing up here and there made her eyes cringe. It's a shame she can't perform it the way it's meant to be. She heard a gasp then the shut of a door, quickly moving her head in the direction of the entrance. Sylvain was standing there, surprised.

His eyes returned normal, now walking to the bed with no expression. Ingrid rose her hands up, eyes wide. She couldn't read his face. "Wait! This is- I just- I only wanted to-" Once he reached the side of the bed she silenced herself. He reached to her and she slammed her eyes closed. She was frozen half a second before she felt the strap leave her shoulder and the weight of the instrument leave her lap.

What felt like forever ended when he played the first note and began singing the song she was attempting to do effortlessly. Her eyes slowly opened, one and then the other. He was a little uncomfortable but he was doing so much better than she was. As he made his way through the song, tension slowly left and he was so talented. A carefree song with the slight bit of pettiness for his father in mention once.

It was so Sylvain. Ingrid listened and watched, nostalgia kicking in from the days he would play song after dong for the younger three. Them begging him to play a song they liked hearing and he would everytime, complaining about how spoiled they were the whole time with a smile on his face.

Once he hit high school things changed. He slowly detached himself from everyone and they let it happen. Felix never stopped fighting though. When Sylvain would push, he would push right back and he kept at it until Sylvain gave up and pulled him to him and now won't let go.

When the song came to an end, Sylvain fixed her with a look that showed his shyness from her reaction. Pink lightly dusting over the few freckles that dotted his cheeks. 

She stood up on her knees on the bed and clapped. "That was very good! The words are a little much for me but, the song is amazing. You're very talented."

He grinned appreciatively at the praise, taking the guitar back and putting it on the holder, " Thanks. It's one I wrote with a friend. She helped with the lyrics. Said they fit me to a T." He chuckled.

She scooted herself off the bed, dusting off her jeans. "Well she was mostly right." Saying as she poked his forehead.

"Mostly?" Raising a hand to rub the spot she poked.

"I don't think you'll be finding any "Nice girls" anymore mmm?" Asking with a closed lip, somewhat threatening smile. "I don't think Felix would appreciate it all that much."

The tallers eyes focused, "Of course not. Never! This was written back when I was a bigger piece of shit than I am now." 

Ingrid slapped him on the shoulder. "Don't laugh at that! You're not a piece of shit Sylvain." He gave her a stupid grin. "Wasn't funny then, isn't funny now." He slumped over a bit. She picked up the score and asked, "So did you write most of these or Dorothea?" Tapping their names on the page with her finger. 

"It depends on the song. We both put in our options and whichever one was better we went with." Moving his weight from one foot to the other, hands behind his head relaxed. "But if you want more details, we went with her ideas most of the time on lyrics and me with the instrumental bit."

"I see." She continued to look at the page while picking up the bag with the clothes she got, throwing it to him. "Put those on. I want to see if they fit right." He looked back at her and then the clothes in question. "We're going out today. First, with a friend and then to my house to ride." He opened his mouth and Ingrid cut him off, "Already asked Mercedes. She said yes, and no! It wasn't hard to convince her. She's quite lenient if you work with her."

He flinched remembering Annette saying close to the same thing. "Why did she agree?"

"She likes that more people are talking to you and agreed with me when I said you need to get out more. After all, that's the best way to get better."

He looked down at the bag, "When are we going?"

"In a few hours. It'll be fine. Let's just relax until then. But put that on first."

He huffed in defeat, "Alright, alright."

~~~~~~~~

He liked the outfit well enough. He didn't know Ingrid knew what size and what colors looked the best on him but, he's not complaining. They're comfortable too. Won't be a problem wearing these while riding either. He walked out and she was leaning on the armrest on the couch.

She was reading the back cover of Bernadetta's first book. "Don't think i've ever seen this book before. Is it new?" That's right. She liked medieval knights and hero tales. She would like the book. The first one anyway. The second is focused more on a modern approach from one of the main characters and their relationship with the main character from the first book. "They must be since i've never heard of Indech and their style is what I like. I bet Ashe would like it too."

"I'd say you haven't. It hasn't been released to the public." Sylvain plopped down beside her, instantly sinking into the cushions.

"It hasn't? Then how have you gotten ahold of it?" She asked checking the back and front, impressed with the handmade book cover.

"Because it's Bernadetta's. She wrote it."

"Really!?" She was looking intrigued by each second. "I never would have expected-" She looked to the side, "Actually no, this is something I could see her doing. She stays inside so much, of course she would be able to." She looked to Sylvain again, "Give me your summary."

"Well.... It's-"

~~~~~~~~

"Where are we going?" Sylvain asked walking beside Ingrid.

"To a cafe."

"Is it-"

"It's clean Sylvain." She doesn't know Dorothea but, with how she spoke about him, she has to be right when she said he'd be okay. She secretly glanced at him. He's not acting the way Mercedes said he would. His eyes aren't moving around endlessly, he's not fidgeting with his hands, pulling at his hair or hesitating when she gets arms length or closer to him. These were things he did constantly with Felix, the one he's most comfortable with. Yet with Ingrid, he hasn't done anything like that.

She was lost in absent thought when there was a tap on her shoulder. She faced Sylvain, "This is the place right?" He flashed a smile, "You almost walked right by it." It fell once he looked at the door. "Looks like it's closed though. Are you sure this is where we're meeting them?"

"I'm pretty sure. This is the address she sent me." Ingrid cupped her hands and looked through them through the window. She looked around. It was empty, no one else around. "It's empty." She let her arms drop and she looked down. What is going on? Did Dorothea not know it was closed? Or did she do this on purpose? What is this feeling in her chest? She brought a fist up to it.

Sylvain put his hand on the handle and turned, "Hey, Look! It's unlocked!" He pushed the door the rest of the wat and went in.

"SYLVAIN!" She hurried in behind him, following his back with his guitar carrier on his back. "Don't just go in because it's unlocked! What's the matter with you!?"

"You never know. Maybe they're open and just forgot to turn the sign and it's their slow time." Saying casually. He looked around the room, scanning the area and picked a table close to the wall. He slid his carrier down and put it up against the wall. He swiped the chair with his hand then sat, leaning back and throwing his arm over the chair next to the one he sat in.

"Are you even listening!? Don't make yourself comfortable!" She steamed out angrily. He just pat the table and gestured to the chair across from him. 

She opened her mouth to yell at him again but he spoke first, "We'll wait here a few minutes and if no one comes, we can leave a note and lock the door behind us. Don't panic so bad."

Maybe that would be best. She'll send another message and give Dorothea a few more minutes and if she doesn't respond or show up, Ingrid knows it was a mistake. She sat down and tried to loosen up but ended up with both arms on the table and her fingers clasped, jaw locked and back straight.

~~~~~~~

She seen her come around the corner. She put a finger up to her soft looking lips to keep Ingrid quiet. The burnette snuck closer, Sylvain's back to her. Ingrid couldn't help but watch her eyes sparkle in mischief, her amazingly toned body slowly creeping up.

She was so mesmerized she was surprised when Sylvain spoke, "I guess we should head out. I was hoping your friend or at least a worker here would show up to make you feel better but-" 

Arms wrapped around him gently and a soft, pillow like weight was put on his head. "Hey there spaz. How you been?"

Ingrid let out a inaudible shriek. 'Her-her- their on his-!' Sylvain, confused, turned his head and Ingrid once again screamed inside her mind. 'He just put his-' There was an feeling bubbling up in her lower stomach and her chest again.

As soon as he realized what happened, he flinched back, looking up at the cheery face of the woman he unknowingly shoved his face into. It took him all of a few seconds for him to notice who it was, his eyes go big and jumped out of the chair, it tumbling over sideways and clattering to the floor from the force. He pulled her into a strong, crushing hug, her laughing lightly and returning the hug by putting her arms under his, palms resting under his shoulder blades.

"It sure has been awhile. Here I was worried and look at you." She barely pulled away enough to look at him, hands sliding right under his shoulder on his arm. "You've gotten taller again. Do you ever stop? What are you? Six foot now?" She smiled fondly.

"Add another inch on there and you've got it." He breathed out in disbelief mixed with happiness. "You've gotten more beautiful yourself." He could hear his voice cracking in his words. "I hope you've been doing okay. You certainly look like you've been doing well."

Still smiling, her eyes closed gracefully. "Fine. I've been doing fine." She backed up, grabbing his hands, "Going to school for my license to open this place." She said gesturing with her eyes. "Gonna be big. I want to continue on with what we had in mind. Introduce people to our music here. You're still going to help me right?" Hope im her question.

Sylvain looked down sadly, "I would but...." He trailed off, unable to look at her. "I did something bad Thea.. I don't think you should have someone like me around involved in your business. It might have a bad affect on you." His words somehow sounding more defeated as he went on.

Dorothea looked at him, mirroring his expression. Ingrid watched on, surprised by him acting so open after only just seeing her again. 'He trusts her so much.' Dorothea speaking calmly caught her attention again.

"Sylvain.." She took one of her hands and rose his face by putting it on his cheek. "The night you left... I knew what might happen. I wanted to stop you but I didn't. Why do you think I did that?"

"Because I most likely looked crazed and I might've hurt you if you tried."

"You know that's not true." Her voice low and small, almost like she was talking to a spooked child. "You wouldn't have hurt me and you know it, even if it did concern Felix."

He stayed silent.

"That night, I seen a fire in your eyes that I never seen before. And that's when I knew... The Sylvain you had been hiding had finally came out. What I was wanting and trying to help you do." She watched him finally look at her. He took her hand from his face, looking back down.

"Are you afraid? Is what I did wrong? Is that why-"

"No." She said fast and firm. "You didn't. I don't care what you did. What I do know is... That the person who had hurt you for YEARS finally got what was coming to him."

"But what I did wasn't-"

"Wasn't what? Humane? No Sylvain, it wasn't but you wanna know what else wasn't?" She waited until he looked at her again in the eyes. "It wasn't humane for him to take a CHILD and do what he did!" She seen the small tense in his body. "He did it to get to you. He just didn't plan on you to fight back because you never did. I hate what happened. I hate that it took someone else to suffer from him for you to retaliate." She looked at him sadly, "Did you think you weren't worth the trouble?"

He looked at her with a face that told her she hit the nail on the head. "Oh, Sylvain.. I still think of you the same as I always have. A friend who keeps getting hurt and won't help himself because he doesn't think he deserves it and a spaz who pines for someone who he THINKS he can't or shouldn't have because he's not good enough or too dirty for them." She brought him back into her, laying his head in her neck, running her hands down his ruby hair.

He shook a little bit then rose up. "You still want to be partners?" Ingrid couldn't see his face, but with the little smile Dorothea was giving him, it must have been quite heartwrenching.

"Of course I do. We should discuss it. I'm making tea right now. Your favorite of course. Ingy?" She looked to Ingrid, "What kind do you prefer? I'll make it."

"Um. If you don't mind, Chamomile or mint please." She rocked her weight back and forth on her feet, watching her shoes.

"No problem sweetie. Any snacks or sweets you fancy?" 

"Just get her whatever you have. She'll eat almost anything." Sylvain was back to his teasing voice and mood. "She'll shove it right in there."

She punched his shoulder and when he bent down from the pain she put him in a headlock, rubbing her knuckles on his head. "I do not!" Why was she so embarrassed over something so trivial? She never cared in the past with Sylvain, Felix or Dimitri joking at her over food. She heard the bell of laughter coming from Dorothea again.

"You two are precious.. It's real sweet to see him so close to someone now. Never thought he'd find such a headstrong, lovely young woman that's so understanding."

"What do you mean by that?" Ingrid asked, her fist still on his head, Sylvain struggling in her hold stopping too.

"Well, you agreed to have him see me even though you didn't know me or what I could've been planning." Her back turned, she put the flavor into each cup, letting it soak. "You're so understanding and a very sweet girlfriend that can put him in his place if need be." She stopped what she was doing and turned around at the choke and coughing reactions. Both seeming to speak at once.

"No, no, no, you've got the wrong idea!"

"Are you serious Thea? That's kinda gross."

Ingrid put him straight back into a headlock, "What was that!?"

"I didn't mean it in a bad way! I swea- OW!" He was stuttering to fix his fuck up. "You're very cute! You're just not what i'm into!"

"Oh! So I'm guessing your taste is darker hair and flat then?"

He looked at her as much as he could with a frown from the insult to Felix. He glanced down and back up in a split second, "Not much of a difference." She felt her cheeks warm. "If anything, he might actually have more curve than you." 

"W-what!?"

"I'm talking about overall. It's true he doesn't have much of an ass but his legs make up for it." She started rubbing harder on his head.

"Stop! Stop right now! Head out of the gutter!"

"Tch. You started it." This little shit.

She was gonna maim him..

They heard laughing and looked up. Dorothea had rubbed a tear from her eye. "I guess I made the wrong assumption. I'm sorry. I guess you're just friends."

"Childhood!" Sylvain chimed in. "She's been mean to me ever since she could crawl. And I have the proof somewhere in my old house."

"That is not true." Ingrid spat.

"It is. Don't let her lie to you Thea."

"How about we just sit down and cool off? And you can tell me more over tea and snacks?"

With the smell of fresh tea wafting through the air, the two bickering agreed and sat down across from each other. Dorothea sat down next to Sylvain and sat the tray down. "So if you two aren't dating and you're with someone else, which I guess is Felix," She pointed to Ingrid, "What about you?"

"I'm not currently dating." She answered tightly.

"Oh...." She leaned forward, her chest leaning on the table and more was showing with every push she made closer. Ingrid tried not to stare, looking to the side of the wall and up. "Does that mean you're available for the taking?" The tone she was using had a depth Ingrid used to hear from Sylvain when she caught him in the act of flirting. And the way she was looking at her..... 'Oh god! These two are WAY too similar!' She looked to her one time before shooting up from the table, the chair making an ugly screech across the floor.

"BATHROOM!" She seen the two still sitting giving her different looks. Dorothea, looking somewhat worried and Sylvain, lips in a line and one eyebrow up. She cleared her throat, "Sorry... I need to go to the bathroom. Could you tell me where it is?" Her face turing pinker.

"Go straight down the hallway and it'll be to the right or if you want more privacy, there's another one upstairs." Dorothea told her. Ingrid paced quickly down the room and down the hallway. Once she heard the door close, she looked to Sylvain, who had already picked the cup up with his tea and blew on it. "Is she available?"

"Yes and no." He said behind his cup.

Dorothea's eyebrows lowered, "Cut that crap with me. I'm serious. She's cute and I want her. Do I have your permission to woo your childhood friend?"

Sylvain stared at her for an awkward minute before laughing out, "Sure knock yourself out. Heads up though, Ingrid thinks she's straight sooo, goodluck with that." He took a drink of his bergamot tea.

He didn't catch the smirk in time. "Well if I recall correctly, I heard a "he" in you two's conversation. And I mean if Felix can convince YOU that you're into men too after the shit you pulled, I got a chance with her." He pouted. "So be my wingman and help me out please?" He refused to answer her, looking out the window the opposite direction of her. She huffed, "Very well. I guess i'll just have to do it myself."

"Wait. Why do you say Felix? It could be someone else. You don't know that." 

She looked at him that screamed, "Really Sylvain?"

"Don't look at me like that."

She huffed, then brought her hands up to her cheek, palms connected in a praying position, "Oh, Dorothea! I can't take it! He's so amazing and so cute! I want to snuggle him! Look at this new picture I got of him sleeping on my shoulder! I've got so many of the same ones but I want to show you all-"

"Okay, okay! That's enough! I get it! You can stop now!" He was red up to his ears, Dorothea couldn't help but giggle.

"Sorry. It's just... Back then when we hung out you either were into your songs, hating life, or gushing over Felix. No in between. So am I right?"

He hung his head, "Yeah. You're right." The hard smack to his back alerted him and made him straighten up.

"Good for you! I knew you would grow a pair one day and say something to him." The small look he gave her made her ask, "You did tell him right?"

"I-." He shut his honey eyes, "I wasn't the one who made a move." He kept his gaze on the steam rising from his tea. "He did. About two years ago. When I was being a jackass. And was turning him away every day." Dorothea listened, solem expression. "He told me that it was a few times recently, but it was more than that." He moved the cup side to side, watching the liquid move back and fourth, "It was a few months. He's so strong. I kept trying to push him away for months and it hurt him.. It hurt him so bad Thea. Yet, he acts like it wasn't a big deal at all."

"You've always said that he was tougher than what everyone believed." She looked to her own cup, "I wanted to meet him. This boy that kept you close, even after you started pushing people away and only spoke to me due to similar circumstances." She softly elbowed him, getting his attention on her, "Will I meet him this time? Or will you fight him again?"

He was confused. "I don't know what happened that night. He got so mad when I brought you up and I wanted you two to meet. He just exploded on me."

"Hmm. Really? You Can't remember?" Fishing for information.

"Not really. I remember some of what we said to each other but, i've nearly forgotten everything up until his ribbon was dangling in my face and I took off." Bringing his arm up to his hair.

"If I ask what happened, would you be able to tell me?"

He let out a shaky breath, "I-I don't know. Might not be the best thing to tell you while i'm out of the clinic."

"Why not?" She leaned her head forward to see him better.

"I have a tendency to get a little worked up when I think about it too much."

"Mmhhm. No more butting in on that then!" She slapped her hands on the table, smile taking over, "I don't know why I asked about something so depressing anyway when we see each other finally."

"Thanks Thea." He responded gratefully.

"You might be getting away from that, but you still have to tell me about Felix!" She grinned.

"Fine. I'll tell you some things. What's your first question?" 

"Lets see..."

~~~~~~~~~

After Ingrid closed the door, she rested her back on it for a second. She needed her heart to settle. She took a few deep breaths and then walked to the mirror and splashed her face with cool water.

Words like that usually don't affect her so bad. Honestly! She's heard it come from Sylvain (not to her of course) so much she should be immune to it. But perhaps it's different when it's happening to you personally or maybe it's because it's Dorothea. That could be the reason. They don't know each other that well and her flirting might be a way to get closer to her faster because Ingrid is used to Sylvain's theatrics.

She nodded and smiled. That's probably the reason. Dorothea doesn't have to do that. She just has to be herself. She'll tell her the next time they're together with just them two.

Walking back out she heard Dorothea.

"Let's see.... Is he still shy and meek?"

"Depends on the meaning of shy. Meek? I wouldn't say so. He's more of a I say whatever I want and if you don't like it go fuck yourself kind of person now."

She sat down and joined in with them, taking a sip of her own cup.

~~~~~~~~

"Are you sure that I can come with you guys? I don't want to intrude." Dorothea asked self-consciously.

"Don't worry. If Ingrid didn't want you to come, you would've known." Sylvain responded right next to her while Ingrid was unlocking the door to the stables. Ingrid let Sylvain put his guitar in the house when they got there.

She pushed the double doors open and went to two horses that were the only two inside the building. "I got Noir and Cream. Noir was always your favorite to ride remember?"

"Do I ever." He went and pat the midnight black horse. "She's the only one that went with my speed and went with my dumb ideas and still loved me for it." He said reminiscing.

"Dorothea?" Green eyes met, "I can get a horse for you as well if you want."

She waved her hands, "No, no. Don't   
Go through the trouble. I'll just ride with one of you if that's alright."

"Of course you can. They won't mind."

They both smiled at one another until Sylvain spoke up, "Is it alright if she rides with you Ingrid? I want to go pretty fast after Noir and I get used to each other again and I don't want to wear her out with the extra weight." Dorothea slapped him quickly after he finished, making him chuckle after.

"Okay no problem but, Dorothea doesn't look like she weighs much at all. She's perfect." She didn't catch what she said until she seen the reactions from the other two. Dorothea looked touched but, it was Sylvain and his grin that made her understand how it could have sounded. "I- i'll go and g-get the equipment. You two wait h-here." Walking away stiffly with red covering her entire face.

"I thought you weren't going to help me." Dorothea said with a cheshire grin herself.

Sylvain wasn't smiling anymore, still giving attention to the horse in front of him, "No. I didn't answer. You took it as a no."

"Point taken." She rose one of her hands, palm up, waiting and not looking at him, watching Ingrid get the things from another small storage in the stable.Sylvain slid his palm across hers in a silent high five, tips of their fingers locking for seconds, sealing the deal between them.

~~~~~~~~~

"It's been so long since i've seen this place.." Honey eyes taking in the scenery of the property. "Looks exactly the same as it always has."

"It's so beautiful and spacious here.." Dorothea let out in awe. "How far is it?"

"We own a little over one hundred acres. Most of it for our livestock."

"That's quite the lot of land. Must be expensive to upkeep."

Ingrid answered her, "Not really. Ever since both my brothers took over, we don't struggle. We're pretty well off actually."

Sylvain glanced to them, almost laughing at Dorothea's sparkle in her eyes. She was hooked now. She was attracted before but now, she's going to dig her claws in and hopefully Ingrid can handle it. He almost felt sorry for her.

"Surprising. I didn't expect you to be so wealthy Ingy. You act so modest and down to earth." Dorothea put her chin on her shoulder next to golden locks, "Most girls like you would flaunt their status."

"Maybe but, we didn't always do so well with money. We've never struggled technically, we just had to make choices. I got used to that lifestyle so I still live by it, even though I have money to spend." Dorothea was close enough Ingrid could smell her shampoo. Vanilla traveling around and she didn't want to inhale. She fought it like a tidal wave.

Thin but toned arms wrapped around her midsection and pulled her closer. 'Oh god! Her- her- their on my- they're so soft...' "ACK!" She started coughing loudly. She thought she heard a snort next to her from Sylvain but, when she looked he was still looking around. 'Ingrid! What is wrong with you!?' Fighting the heat on her face and on her back.

~~~~~~~~~

"What will you be having today? Black coffee?"

"Yes."

"Nothing else?"

"No."

Felix didn't bother to write it down. Hubert always ordered the same thing every time. "What about you?"

"A peach sorbet and bergamot tea if you would. To go on the sorbet."

His pen clicked and wrote the order down. "It'll be out shortly."

~~~~~~~~

With the tray held in his palm he carried their order out but was stopped when noticing he was missing the coffee. What's taking so long? He walked up to the red head, "What is it Ferdinand? I need the coffee order."

"It's just... How do you use the grinder? I don't usually make coffee." His smile still set in place.

'Are you serious?' He put the sorbet and tea down. He'll have to remake them. "Why didn't you ask earlier? I would have showed you and I wouldn't have wasted the other order." Pushing Ferdinand to the side with his hip.

"You were busy. I didn't want to bother you. You move so fast, it's hard to keep up."

"You get used to it. Now pay attention. I'm only showing you once."

~~~~~~~~

"Here. Sorry for the wait." 

"Mmm. This is brewed well. Not many can brew bergamot the right way. I'm impressed Felix." Edelgard said while taking another small sip, her small hands barely enveloping the cup.

He managed to hide the fluttering feeling in his gut. "I just make it a lot. Not that impressive."

"That's a little surprising. I didn't think many liked this flavor." Her eyes twinkled tasting the tea again. "It's even more impressive that you can make coffee up to Hubert's standards. That, I must say is a feat few seem to have."

"It is not that hard to make coffee Edelgard." Hubert answered.

"Coffee is coffee. Here's your ticket." Felix slid them the holder with the ticket. Edelgard picked it up along with the USB that was under it. Her face was intrigued. Felix answered, "Randolph found everything he could in the building. He checked all the computers, including the one in the head office. It should be plenty of information to help you."

"But not enough to satisfy you is it?" She held it in her hands, flipping the port uncaring. "You want more personal information to take him down for good don't you?" His face tightening was more than enough answer for her. "Very well. I'll tell my father that I want more done and it shall be. I just wonder...." her violet eyes scanned him curiously, "What exactly are you wanting to find?"

"It's personal. I want to do more than just put that man's career on the line."

"I see.... Hubert. Let us go now. It is time we see if we can use what's been found. Hubert?"His scornful eyes were focused in another direction. "We do not have time for this." She muttered walking off and handing Felix the money and a reasonable tip. "I'll have the money come in for this later." Pointing to the USB.

Felix led his eyes to where Hubert was looking. He looked down to him, "You could just tell him."

He heard a low cackling and Hubert spoke. "How amusing. One of the most emotionally suppressed people telling me to talk about feelings." He stood up and began to follow Edelgard. Felix watched him walk away and let the silence spread around him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smol Edel is best Edel and she's tired of their shit. What is happening here and will Sylvain agree to help Dorothea after what happened? This chapter is a bit longer due to me maybe having to take a week off of writing for a week with my family. I will still write if I find the time. Sorry guys, i know you wait long enough as is for updates but i'll try my best to keep up to schedule.


	8. That could have gone better

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Diving deeper into the mindset of Felix and Sylvain's past. Sylvain is enjoying his time with Dorothea and Ingrid but, the thoughts he's trying to push to the back of his head get thrown in front and center. Felix is only attempting to do his job and some comments throw his temperament off balance and Mercedes is able to coerce Sylvain to talk more about his feelings but, at what cost?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Finally finished this chapter. It was a hard one honestly and the future ones are going to get even worse. Before you start reading I want you to know that this has some abuse reference (mentally, physically and somewhat sexually). I know I say this quite a bit but, please be careful reading if this is sensitive topics for you.

"It's even bigger inside..." Dorothea said out loud. She was standing stunned, looking around the house (More like mansion) in amazement. "What do you do with all this room?" Asking in genuine intrigue.

"In my opinion, they made the rooms way too big. We use all the rooms if that's what you're asking." The blonde responded, "I really don't see the need in the size. I don't want to be cramped per say but, I dont like the idea of climbing two sets of stairs to make it to my room either." Finger under her chin, voicing her thoughts.

"I bet. Too far from the kitchen for you Ingrid?" Sylvain asked nonchalantly, teasing in the edge of his words.

"I swear if you don't stop i'm gonna-"

"What kind of food do you like Ingy?" Dorothea, now facing the other two again. 

"Food? Oh!... Well I don't consider myself picky. I like a majority of foods. As long as it's a good meal, i'll enjoy it." Answering her, instantly forgetting her annoyance at Sylvain's comment.

"One of her favorites is definitely any meat." Sylvain winked. "The more meat on the bone, the better." 

"Who wants a bone with hardly any meat on it? It defeats the purpose. " Putting her hands on her hips, defending her appetite. "Why are you grinning like that?"

"Stop teasing her Sylvain." Dorothea spoke out, looking at the pictures in Ingrid's room. "Oh!? Is this you guys?" She picked a frame up and a painted nail was lightly tapping the clear glass. "Aaaww! You all were so cute!" Sylvain and Ingrid moved next to Dorothea on either side. "Do you have more like this?"

"I have an album if you'd like to-"

"Yes! Definitely!"

Ingrid laughed breathlessly, "Okay. Hang on and i'll go get it."

~~~~~~~~

Another couple minutes later, Ingrid had found the album and fixed herself next to the burnette sitting on the side of the bed, leading to Dorothea being in the middle. "Here you go. It's the pictures we've had together through the years." She slid the book into the others hands. 

Dorothea carefully opened to the front. "Oh my.... Is this the four of you?" Both nodded at her question. "You really weren't joking when you said crawling huh?"

"Not at all." Sylvain answered her as she was looking at the red headed child sitting in the middle of two blonde toddlers sitting on each side and a third sitting sideways on Sylvain's knees with dark hair.

"It's a shame that YOU are the one they had to look up to." She jokingly said still looking at the picture.

"C'mon. I wasn't that bad of an influence." Dorothea chortled through her nose at his whine.

"Actually. He's telling the truth." Ingrid added. "He was very good with us up until... Well... I'm sure you know when." She met with Dorothea's matching green eyes.

"Mostly. However, i'd like to hear a side other than his if you two don't mind." 

Ingrid leaned over to see the nod from Sylvain for confirmation and started, "It might not be all that interesting but, Sylvain at his age was very responsible. He watched us a lot when we got older. Sylvain was the one we looked up to, like an older brother..." She backtracked, "Of course there was still adults around to watch us though!"

Dorothea's knowing smile told her she knew that it wasn't true. "It's okay Ingrid. I know more than what you might think."

Ingrid inhaled deeply, her breath trembling at the end. "Glenn and Miklan would watch until they got bored and went off. Sylvain would then take over for them." Her chin lowered, eyes downcast to the soft beige carpet in her room.

"Hey.. Come on. I didn't mind. I actually preferred it when Miklan was away at that point of age." Sylvain was being reassuring.. Or he was at least trying. He laughed weakly, unsurely, as if he was also trying to convince himself. "I was the oldest after them, so of course I had to take over."

"No! You didn't!" Ingrid snapped at him. "Our parents were not right leave us alone the way they did! Even if my brothers, your brother, or even Glenn was teenagers... It was wrong." Ending off deflated. "Only your mother and Fana watched us when they could." She wanted to bite her tongue off mentioning Lily in front of him and she wanted to slap herself seeing his face.

Sylvain's smile shattered the mood to the two girls. He choked at first until he cleared his throat and tried again, "How is she?" 

Ingrid once again looked down, "I don't know... None of us have seen her since..." She didn't have to say, Sylvain closed his eyes slowly, eyelashes resting on freckled cheeks. "Margrave doesn't really get out much either anymore. He works of course, but, he really only comes out when my father invites him to dinner or Rodrigue asks to eat out to catch up. He's been having some issues with his company lately."

Honey eyes looked into hers. "Oh.." He didn't care about that shit company. His hand went up and clasped the gem of his necklace playing with it, nervously asking, "Rodrigue doesn't ask to have dinner at his place anymore?"

Ingrid shook her head slowly. "The last time he was there something happened. Dimitri told me that Felix started acting different after he bumped into Margrave accidentally in the hall. After that, he didn't speak much at the table and when Dimitri went to his room later..." She broke eye contact thinking back to what he said. "Felix was in a daze and he wouldn't respond to him. He only did after Dimitri touched him. It wasn't pretty..." 

Sylvain's stomach was flipping and burning. "What did he say to Felix? Margrave. What did he say?" Asking, barely concealing the anger festering. Ingrid just shook her head again. Before she could speak, Sylvain stood up losing his composure finally. "Dammit Ingrid! Tell me! What did that-that bastard say!? Don't hide it from me!"

Ingrid looked at him, the white in her eyes showing more from her shock of his sudden change in mood. Dorothea stood up halfway through his yelling to put herself in front of Ingrid. She didn't think he would do anything. But, since it concerns Felix... It's hard to say what might happen. Her green eyes locked onto his hands, tight fists, knuckles white and trembling. She hesitantly laid hers on one of his. "Sylvain.." She rose his hand up still in the tight fist. "Please relax. If Ingrid knew what was said, i'm positive that she'd tell you." His breathing was off, shaking and light. "Hey, breathe... There you go... In...." She breathed in deeply, he copied her, "and out... Good job." 

One of her hands was rubbing his fist, "Now... Undo your fists." He relaxed just enough for her to put her fingers on his palm and moved it open. She hissed through her teeth. His nail broke skin enough for it to bleed a little. "See, look. You hurt yourself getting so worked up." Saying as she was clicking her tongue at him. She turned her head back to the blonde, "Could you get me something to clean this up with Ingrid? Please?" Said blonde got up nodding.

"What do you need?" She asked stopping at the door, head facing away from them.

"Warm, clean water, a washcloth, something to disinfect, medicine to keep the wound from drying up too quickly, some gauze and something to wrap it with."

"Okay." She then rushed out the room.

"It's not that bad.." mumbling more to himself.

"No it's not, but it might be best to have her leave so she and you can get a grip on your bearings. You don't want to scare or hurt the ones who love you right?" She finally looked up at him from his half-crescent cuts.

"I didn't mean to get so angry. I- I don't know what came over me."

~~~~~~~~

"What do you think he's bringing us?" Annette asked exited.

"I don't care as long as he remembers to put extra icing on mine." Lysithia voiced out, reading her book.

"Felix won't forget. He's surprisingly a very good host and server isn't he?" Annette remaining peppy. Bernadetta nodded, small smile playing on her lips, eyes locked onto her laptop, typing in a speed that was almost unnatural.

Lysithia scoffed amused, "You'll think he's good at everything no matter what."

Her smile flit to shock before she frowned, a little blush stretching across her nose and cheeks. "Oh yeah? Well..." She slapped the table in front of her, cautious to not make to loud of a sound, "When are you asking Cyril out?"

Lysithia didn't change in expression or look up from her book, appearing unaffected, but her pigment now matched Annette's. "That's irrelevant to what I just said."

"Isn't it though?" Bernadetta finally joined in at the worst time, "You both have huge crushes on them." Saying without thinking. 

Two gasps later and then a hand slapped onto her mouth as if she hasn't already made her comment. Annette nervously stumbled out, "Are y-you c-cr-crazy!? Don't just sa-say those things! Especially when Felix is around."

"It's not like he'll hear.."

"Felix hears everything!"

"No. He's too distracted right now. Look." Her little finger lifted off and pointed to his direction, "Ferdinand is starting to get on his last nerve because he's not listening properly. All his attention is on his irritation. He's not going to notice unless YOU make a scene." Moving her fingers back to the keys. "He seems different today. Normally he's already walked off from getting fed up with Ferdinand. He's surprisingly tolerant today."

"So it wasn't just me thinking that." Lysithia said assuredly. "But he always is better acting on Sunday so..."

"Maybe," The blue eyed girl cut in, "But he's in a whole different spectrum. Wonder if that's why his hair is different too?" Her smile bright while looking at the way his ponytail moved when he turned his head. Her smile didn't fade but it did suddenly take on a sad feeling with the way her eyes lowered, "Goes to show how happy Sylvain makes him huh?"

Lysithia and Bernadetta halted what they were doing to face Annette. Both concerned with her sunny tone dropping. At the pages not turning and the clicks and clacks from the keys not sounding, the red head looked up to the others. They were looking at her, sympathy twinkling in their eyes. She's feeling sorry for herself again. Need to change that right now!

She stood up and slapped the table with her petite hands, 'FELIX!!" His body jerked in alarm at her voice echoing in the mostly empty diner.

"What?" Lifting his voice high enough for her to hear.

"BRING US SOMETHING SWEET TO DRINK TOO. I WANT TO GORGE MYSELF TODAY!!" Her laugh sunny and uplifting.

Instead of getting annoyed, he smiled, "Change your mind already? You're very indecisive you know that?"

"I'm not! I'm just here to keep you on your toes!" 

She seen the laugh over hearing it. "Are you now?"

"Yep!" He left Ferdinand to get their drinks, her eyes attached to his smile. 

~~~~~~~

"Here." Felix put one slice down, "Extra strawberries," Annette picked a little slice off the cake and popped it into her mouth as soon as the plate hit the table and his hand left it. "Extra icing. You're going to have sugar as blood at this rate." Lysithia "hmph'd" at his comment. "And your sweet buns." They were wrapped to make it easier to eat and type. Her mouth watered smelling the aroma coming from them. She finally took her eyes off the screen and chowed down on one. 

At her scarfing down the pastry, Felix had to ask, "Have you ate anything else today?" She automatically stopped, food still in her cheeks. She refused to look at him, but started to chew slower. "Alois gets worried if you don't eat." She swallowed roughly, still unwilling to meet his eyes, but she had her head more in his direction now. "I'll make you something to take home too for later."

"T-thanks Felix. Bernie appreciates it."

"How much is all this going to be?" Annette asked while sipping her drink.

"It's on the house."

"What? Felix, no. You let us go all the time without paying."

"It's fine. I'll handle it. Have to spend my money on more than just spoiling Sylvain with it."

"Well if you say s-"

"You're like some kind of doting big brother. It's quite precious." Claude's voice cut in like nails down a chalkboard. "Why don't you treat me better if you're capable? They don't ever pay but you treat them so nicely." Teasing as always. "If I remember correctly, that's why you said you are so mean to Yuri and me."

He answered with a groan. His arms crossed.

"C'mon it can't be THAT hard to be sweet to us. By the way, LOVE the hair. What's the occasion for the hairstyle change?"

His frown deepened, "It's none of your business." He made to turn to leave quickly to get away from Claude but, he ended up slamming into Ferdinand. He knew before the impact finished that he would have to change. The drinks the orange haired boy was carrying covered his shirt after soaking through the apron.

"Oh no. Felix. I'm so sorry!" Ferdinand began pulling napkins from his pockets in his apron and patting his shirt to somehow lessen the wet spot.

"No need. It's already too much. I have to change." 

Leonie made her way over hearing the commotion. "What is going on guys?"

"Ooh. That's too bad. Want me to help you get the sticky clothes off? Wouldn't be any trouble to me- Ooof!" Lysithia's elbow connected with his gut at the same time that Leonie's palm hit the back of his head.

"Shut up Claude. You're partly to blame for this." Lysithia started fussing at him.

"How?"

"Y-y-you got him worked up. Shame on you." Bernadetta trying to fuss at him as well but fizzing out from her nerves. Annette and Leonie voiced in after, beginning to lecture him as well.

Ferdinand was still attempting to pat the wet area while speaking nervously. Felix was trying to block out the commotion but, all the grating and mixing of all the voices around him set his nerves on fire. He was handling it well enough until... "Hey, now that i'm looking closer at that hairstyle... You DO look a lot like your brother. He was the youngest captain ever in the force right? Dimitri told me before, I didn't see it but now... Wow! The likeness is uncanny." Claude added. Amber eyes widened and he suddenly gripped Ferdinand's arm and pushed it away, standing up and stalked off to the break and locker room.

A pair of purple eyes silently watched as everyone went quiet after Felix stormed off. 

"What happened?" Claude asked.

"Oooh noo. He's angry. Felix is angry. Eee!" Bernadetta put her hands over her eyes and balled up in her seat.

~~~~~~~

Felix burst into the room, shutting the door and locking it behind him. He furiously unbuttoned his shirt after tossing the apron off and made way the bathroom. He threw the shirt into the bin. There's no way all of that is going to come out. Not when he still has a few more hours to go. He grabbed a clean rag that they would use for the tables. He turned the water on to give it time to warm and slapped the rag on the counter.

He unzipped his bag, looking for a spare white shirt but couldn't find it. It might have fell out at the clinic.. Dammit! What is he going to do now?

"Hey..." He turned hearing a voice. Yuri...

"How did you get in?"

The jingling of keys ran through his ears. "You're not the only one with a spare." He went to his own bag and pulled out a shirt and tossed it his way. "We're about the same size. It should fit. Might be a bit tighter than what you're used to since I prefer more fitting clothes."

"Thanks I guess." He stood up from his knees. The water was now the right warmth. He cleaned off his chest and abdomen to rid the stickiness. "Ugh. It's so gross. Disgusting."

He thought Yuri left until he heard him ask, "Don't much care about being compared to Glenn do you?" He was leaning on the frame of the doorway as Felix seen through the mirror.

"Tch. Aren't you rather perspective? Want a fucking medal? How hard is it to guess that?"

"Can't let people like Claude get to you."

"It still pisses me off."

"He's just joking. I doubt he believed he would get you so riled up. They're just words Felix. They can't hurt you." That was the final straw. Felix took his eyes away from the mirror, walked to Yuri and pushed him back before slamming the door. His voice was then muffled from the door. "I'm not being mean. I'm being serious. Not everyone that says stupid shit like that means it in a bad way."

Felix finished buttoning up the shirt and threw the door open, "And what the fuck would you know? You don't know what someone's true intentions are. He could be up to something worse. You don't know that." He hissed.

"And you know that he's up to no good? I've known Claude a while. He's not someone that that goes out to hurt people. He just likes to have fun. He only wants you to loosen up a bit. Like you are with your friends out there. It's healthy to let loose the tension." His head tilted to the area in the diner.

"There's better ways for him to go about it. For one, maybe dial it down so he doesn't seem as conniving."

"To tease? That's what your friends are doing most of the time...." His hand went to his chin, forefinger resting near his jaw, "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you're more untrusting towards men than women. Do you not like people of the same gender as you? Wait, no. You get along with Ashe, Ferdinand, that Randolph guy and the owner Dedue just fine. Do you maybe only get along with older men?"

"What if you just fuck off and stop asking such personal questions? Ashe isn't that much older than me and Ferdinand is around the same age so that right there is your answer. It just depends on the person. The friends I have is just coincidence that they're mostly girls. I don't give two fucks what someone has in their pants."

The only response he got was a cocky twich of Yuri's mouth. "Fucking asshole." He slid between Yuri and the doorway. "You two want to know why I don't act nice with you? Fine. I don't much care for your scheming, secretive, cocky attitude. It's weird and offputting."

He unlocked the door and twisted but Yuri's words made him stop. "Hmmm.... Scheming.. Secretive... Cocky... How odd. What if we took out the cocky part? We'd be exactly like you. Would you like us then?" The shiver up his spine was noticeable. Does he know what Felix is doing? It's not possible. He's left no tracks yet, what if-

No... He's just trying to mess with him. Nothing more than that. "I don't know what you two are up to with messing with me or what you think you're gaining by doing it."

"Let's just say it's harmless curiosity."

"If that's it, you better pick someone else to pick at and examine. I don't have the time nor patience to be your stray cat to poke at."

Yuri didn't stop him from leaving. He cocked his hip to the side, hand on his hip, the other one playing with his bangs, twirling it in his finger. "Well, that could have gone better. Ashe is going to let me have it later. Stray cat... Odd choice of words."

~~~~~~~

"Wrap this here.... Aaaannnddd.... Done! Wrapped and clean. You're welcome." Dorothea expressed after finishing the wrap around his hands.

"That's really good wrapping. Have you done it before? Have you took nursing classes?" Ingrid asked.

"No. Manuela taught me the basics but, let's just say i've had my fair share of practice..." She didn't look too proud to say what she did, in fact, her lips were in a harsh line. Ingrid didn't miss her emerald eyes flick back to Sylvain, who left to rummage through his binder, looking for a certain sheet downstairs.

"Oh... Thank you." She let out suddenly after moments of silence.

"W-what for?" Dorothea was finally shocked with the sincerity in Ingrid's own matching eyes.

"For everything you have done, and did for him. When the rest of us was too blind by Miklan's act to realize what was actually happening. I- I thought that I was the one who kept an eye on everyone. Kept them safe and in line but I..." She let out a quivering sigh, "He must hate me."

"Ingrid.." Dorothea took one of her hands. They were soft but had a dry, rough feeling. Ingrid doesn't act like the typical girl who moisturizes often. Working out in the stables, playing sports and working in the restaurant. Definitely the hands of a hard worker. "Sylvain doesn't hate you. He never has. The only person he's ever hated is his father."

Sniffling in her words, "He didn't hate Miklan? But he killed him. Miklan hurt him. It's-" She halted her words when Dorothea sadly shook her head. "But, the state Miklan was in... If it wasn't hate- Dorothea!" She placed her hands over her mouth to lower her voice to a whisper. "You don't just-just repeatedly strike someone with something like an-an axe and then toss them into a well to bleed out! That's rage and hate of the worst caliber."

"It was where Felix was in danger.. His feelings for his brother are complicated. " 

"Felix had some minor cuts and bruises by the time they were found. He had a pretty bad sprained ankle that left him to limp for a few days and that was it. Miklan needed to be put in his place. To be killed?"

"I don't know. All I know is that someone showed up screaming to Sylvain in the yard that Felix was taken by "The Wolf" and he was taking him to the cabin. Sylvain panicked and took off without even saying anything. I wanted to go with him... He wouldn't let me."

Dorothea needed to change the subject. If Sylvain comes up while they're talking about it, he'll get awkward. So she picked up the album again and turned through the pages until one caught her eye. "Ingrid... Why is Sylvain soaked in this one but everyone else isn't?"

Ingrid scooted closer to her and leaned in and put her finger on the picture, "This one? That's Glenn, Dimitri, Sylvain, Felix and me." Glenn had the camera raised up like a selfie. Ingrid was attached to his opposite arm with both of hers latched on in an open laugh matching his own. Dimitri was in front of Glenn looking up confused, as if not knowing what to do. Sylvain had a smile on his face that was somewhat mischievous, pulling Felix into his wet clothes that didn't seem to impress the black headed child who was in mid complaint.

She giggled. "Glenn threw him in the river when Felix hugged Sylvain and not him when they finally caught up to us after we had been waiting for awhile. At least, that's what he said. I guess he got a little jealous. It was all in good fun." Her fingers lightly went down the older boys face, smile falling. "It still feels like a bad dream and one day he'll suddenly show up and say it was just a joke. That was just like him." The nostalgia left her face. Now would be a good time to let Dorothea know. "Enough of that though. Dorothea. I have to tell you something."

"Yes?" 

"About the flirting..." Dorothea stopped running her hands through her hair to smooth it down. "You don't have to act flirty like Sylvain to get me to be comfortable around you." Her eyes were getting wider with each word Ingrid said to her. "I know it's probably difficult to do that with me." Ingrid tugged her hair to the front and started playing with the end to avoid Dorothea's gaze. "I'm not exactly the most fun person to be around."

Should she have said that? Dorothea hasn't said anything back. Is she so relieved that she doesn't have to do anything now that she's not even speaking to her? 

"Oh, Ingrid. You silly thing." She finally looked back to the left of her to see Dorothea.

Bad. Idea. Very, very bad idea. She was looking at her the same way she did back at the cafe except, nothing is separating them now and her whole body is in view. Her sultry body language was making Ingrid nervous.

"Ingrid. Has Sylvain ever flirted with you before?" Her question was entirely curious yet, there was a little unknown emotion Ingrid couldn't place that mixed with it.

"Well, no. I've just seen him do it. H-he flirted with other girls in front of me and t-the way your flirting with m-me is like the way he does- or did- is all i'm saying." She tried to make some distance with their touching thighs without Dorothea noticing.

She noticed.

She bumped their hips back together, "That's wrong. I feel like I should do it more now and prove you that we're not the same." She put her left hand on Ingrid's knee. Ingrid didn't make a move to get her hand off so she left it. "Pay attention now. And i'll show you how many leagues behind me he is." Taking her right hand and tilting her chin up to look at her.

What's going on? What's happening? The two questions running through Ingrid's head. It's getting hard to breath. The hand on her knee moved up the smallest bit. She jerked and it made the older girl pause her movement again. She has to focus on something else or her heart was going to burst. "With the way you say that, it makes me think he's not as experienced as he made people believe." She managed to squeak out.

The burnette only humored her and played along. "Oh, he fooled everyone. He may have flirted and kissed a few girls but he couldn't ever touch them. He always, always backed out before it got too far." With Ingrid's blush lessening, her hand moved up again until it was now resting on her thigh.

The nervous and amused chuckle came out naturally, "When you say that, it sounds like he's still a virgin."

Dorothea's face leaned in, "I'll tell you a secret." The hand on her chin moved her hair from her ear and she felt hot breath hit it soon after.

~~~~~~~~

"I wonder if i've given them enough time alone?" Sylvain said out loud, holding his music in his hand, guitar now strapped to his back again. It's been a good twenty minutes at least. He went back up and put his ear to the door.

"Really? I would have never guessed that..." Ingrid's voice.

"Uh huh. Totally sweet isn't it?" Dorothea answered. "Must be hard to imagine him to think that way huh?"

"It's... Unexpected but... Not unbelievable. I can understand why he got so upset. Honestly!" Her voice got louder with tired fondness. "He's so Sylvain. Always-" He couldn't catch the rest. Her voice dimmed lower and lower. They're talking about him. But, at least it doesn't sound negative so, he won't worry.

Once the muffled voices settled, he decided to go back in. "Hey! Found it Thea! Want to show her your song now?" He was almost surprised by her closeness to Ingrid already. 

Almost..

"Well duh! That's why I asked her to get you to bring it!"

~~~~~~~

"That was fun! We'll have to do it again!" Dorothea exclaimed at the front door to the cafe.

"Indeed. Are you sure this is as far as you need for us to walk with you? I don't mind dropping him off and going with you?" Ingrid told her, some worry in her tone.

"No, no. It's fine here. I do live here after all. I live in the second floor. Maybe we can hang out here next time so I can show you my studio room." Her hands behind her back in comfortable posture.

"Sounds lovely. Sylvain playing the guitar is beautiful but, I would like to hear the mixes you have on the port."

"I'll see you around then. Don't hesitate to text me. I'm available to talk to you anytime. You should go before Sylvain gets too anxious. You're expecting a call after all right?" Both girls faced Sylvain now.

"Yeah. Felix will call the room phone in around the next hour or so. I want to be there." He answered quickly, looking to the watch on his wrist. His foot was tapping the concrete underneath them rhythmically. 

"Alright let's go. See you around Dorothea." She was surprised by the hug she was put in and after they pulled away, Sylvain was already down a little ways. "Hey! Wait! Don't you want to tell her bye first!?"

The hand that didn't have the wrist watch was up in the air, "Bye Thea! Hope to see you soon!" He was still looking down at his watch. "Hurry Ingrid!"

Ingrid had a furious pout that was replaced soon after once Dorothea shot passed her. So fast! She watched as Dorothea jumped on his back. "Oh no you don't! You give me a proper goodbye! And I mean it!" Her arms were wrapped around his neck and she was messing up his hair with what she could reach.

"Ack! Okay, okay! Just get off of me!" Ingrid smiled. Another lively person to join the group. Her and Felix will get along well, she just knew it. She just has to get Felix on board with the idea first.

~~~~~~

They're back. Mercedes was waiting for them outside.

"You're back!" Her hands clapped together in front of her. "Did you enjoy your day?"

Sylvain let out a relaxed huff. "Yeah.. Just what I needed. What will make it better is to end the day with Felix being the last one I hear before I head to bed."

"So sweet. If he heard that, he'd call you a dope who was pleased too easy."

"Ouch! I think you two are spending too much time together with how your words are getting more cut throat." Mercedes only answered with a carefree giggle.

~~~~~~

His room was quiet other than Mercedes pulling the dirty linen from the basket and putting it into the cart. Once she was finished she washed her hands and came back to sit next to him.

"He'll call soon. Don't worry too hard okay? He might be getting in later." The only answer she received was a small "hmm." He clearly wasn't listening. His thumb nail was in his teeth, leg bouncing up and down.

Her eyes lowered. Sylvain worries to the point he gets into his own world, thinking about the worst case scenario if Felix doesn't call during the week after dark. It's hard to watch when he gets like this.

She finally put her hand down on his jumping leg to get his attention. He looked at her but, his dull eyes was only proving that he sees her but she's not important enough to get out of the thoughts inside.

"He has more homework than normal remember? It's close to exams. I'm sure he'll call once he's done. He's at home. He's safe there."

The moving on his leg stopped abruptly. He removed his thumb and stared her down. The look was making her uneasy and his rough voice almost frightened her.

"He's not safe there. He's just as in danger there as he is outside. Unless he's with me, he won't be safe. Rodrigue can't take care of him. He's blind to the monster living in his own home. He'd hurt Felix along with that thing." Such venom in his words that it's surprising to her how he got along with Dimitri so well yesterday.

This is troubling. He's never spoke this way before. He's talking honestly with her. It's what she wanted but...

Is this the real Sylvain? He's terrifying. Did something happen to make him think this way? 

"Why would you say that? You've always spoke good about them but now you don't like them?"

"Before I knew that Rodrigue drinks himself to the point of drowning himself and saying that Felix is the one that should have put the bullet through his head and Dimitri putting his hands on Felix that leaves bruises in the shapes of his fingers? Yeah! I did!"

"What!?" She stood up in shock. "How long has this been going on? Why has he not said anything to anyone? You mean all those marks that Rodrigue called and asked about weren't from you?" Her hands limply fell from her mouth to her sides. "Why did you not defend yourself?"

"How should I know!?" He stood up too, "The reason I know this is from Lysithia! Felix didn't tell me! He doesn't tell me anything! I didn't know about him staying with her some days of the week because his dad screams at him to the point he has to run!" He began pacing around the room. "I didn't know that Dimitri wakes up in the middle of the night and goes to his room and talks to him, thinking he's Glenn! And getting angry at him enough to hurt him like that! I didn't even know Rodrigue called you about marks in the first place! I've never left a mark on Felix at all! Not even so much as a hickey! I've never seen any marks on him at all Mercedes!"

"Felix didn't tell you about Rodrigue calling? B-but he said he would talk to you about it so I wouldn't have to. He told me not to worry about it. I thought you two just got a little rough with each other. Like on your neck right there."

"Rough!? I can't go rough on him! Just thinking about what could happen if I ever tried is enough to paralyze me from even doing it!" He stopped and motioned to his mark, "Felix leaves hickeys sometimes but that's it! If I lost control, there's no telling what I could do to him! What if I end up being exactly like HIM!?"

"Sylvain? What are you talking about? Exactly like who?" Her head tilted in worry.

His fury vanished and his steps halted. Eyes wide in shock he turned to her like a scared child. "I- I..." He looked away, jerking his line of sight away from her, hiding his face. "I don't know what i'm talking about. Just forget it Mercedes."

"I'm sorry but I can't. Whatever this is... It's what's keeping you from getting better. Let me help you. Please..." She crept up slowly, carefully. He turned his face from her more, head down, eyes stitched shut, but he didn't move from her hand that she put on his shoulder.

".....I'm not good enough and that's why he doesn't rely on me. I'm too unstable. And the more time passes, the more my face changes. I look in the mirror and all I see is how I look more and more like him. And how I want to do the same thing that he did. I'm a terrible person Mercedes. I know he needs to leave me, he would be better off. All I do is remind him of what happened by staying here. I tried to push him away two years ago and I was too selfish to follow through with it."

"You're you. You're not all these awful things that you think you are. To me, Felix is someone who won't waste time on something he doesn't care about. He cares about you so much and I doubt he thinks that way." She tried to explain to him. 

"Felix would. He says he won't do something that's meaningless yet, he's still living in that house. Holding onto to hope that those two will snap out of it. He's hurting himself by believing in others. He only wants to see the good in people that's not there."

'Where is this coming from!? Annie? What did you and Lysithia say?' His thoughts aren't easy to hear. It's even harder to see how hard he's avoiding to look her in the eye, voice becoming devoid of emotion the longer he goes on.

"He needs to leave me be. I know he he has to get away from me to get better but I can't shake him off. I just can't." He finally let his eyes open to look at her. She wanted to back away from the suffering gaze he put on her. The inner battle within him was tearing him apart.

"Sylvain..." She carefully maneuvered him into her embrace. She can't allow herself to cry. She's not supposed to get too emotionally involved with the patients here. To think that a majority of the nurses here are scared of him. The things they say...

*He's insane. He must've just been jealous of his brother's success.*

*To think that he could do that..*

* I wouldn't doubt if he planned out what happened and that other kid was in on it with him.*

*It was his own brother!*

*Give up on him Dr. Martritz.*

*He's a lost cause. Just rule him out for manslaughter to rid yourself of him. The police will say the same.*

If they could see him like this would they still say these things? What happened to make them this way? There's so much everyone doesn't know. Things she doesn't know and these two are traumatized from it. 

She tugged him closer. "I just wish I could've got there sooner. I never should have left him alone in the first place."

If he would just tell her more. It could do so much. It might set her on track to help him. 

"He's my everything."

Three simple words that say so much. And she allowed herself to shed a tear, but just one.

Only one.

~~~~~~~

Felix fell back onto his bed. His alarm clock bright in the dark room showing him how late it was. If he goes to sleep now, he could get a decent night's sleep in. But, he can't. He should call Sylvain first.

Ingrid told him who she was bringing along with them today. He told her she could do what she wanted as he didn't care...

But it was Ingrid. She knew somehow that this girl made him self-conscious. She was Sylvain's best friend in a matter of months. She knocked Felix down from his post so easily and Sylvain started telling her more and him less and less. Eventually, she was who Sylvain wanted to be with all the time. It was always "Dorothea this or Thea that."

He's never met her and he kinda wants it to stay that way. She's what made Felix snap at Sylvain. He was supposed to go with him, but instead he wanted to spend it with her. If he calls and she's what he talks about.... So excitedly.... Felix doesn't know if he could stand it.

He absolutely hated her back then. Now?

.....

It's complicated.. He knows that she's what kept Sylvain going. No matter what Felix said, it didn't help. And he is grateful to her for that.

Yet he hates her because, Felix knows.. 

He knows that if Sylvain could and if she would want to.. He would choose her. Why would he- why would he want him if he had a better option? Someone who isn't a stain of his past and the constant reminder of his life in shambles from the worst part in his life?

He stopped his thoughts. Sylvain answering over the phone on the first ring. "Sylvain?"

~~~~~~

It's been hours since Felix was supposed to call him. Mercedes left over an hour ago after she made sure it was okay to be by himself. Is Felix okay? What is going on? It's almost one in the morning. He has school so why isn't he home yet?

The phone was unable to finish the first ring by how quickly he picked it up.

"Sylvain?" Felix asked sleepily.

"Oh thank god!" He sighed out. "Are you okay? What happened? Why are you calling so late?" His voice sounded winded and breathless.

"I had some errands I had to run. I had to study for midterm as well. Sorry I kept you up worrying. If I would've known, I'd have called sooner." He yawned at the end.

"You're okay though?"

"Of course I am? Why wouldn't I be?"

It was silent. Sylvain took a few moments to respond. "I was just asking, I guess."

"Don't worry about me. You need to prepare yourself for tomorrow."

"Y-yeah. You're right. I got this." His voice was shaking but, he was confident.

"I hope you do well. Don't push yourself."

"Mmm. I won't.... Call me tomorrow?"

Why is he asking? "Yeah. I'll call earlier."

"Good... Bye Felix. Goodnight."

"....You too." 

The call ended as abruptly as it started. That was strange. Why did he just hang up like that? It is late however. He might have just been tired.

'Cause he was up waiting for you. It's your fault.' Felix shook his head and rolled to his side. No more time for thoughts. Sleep eventually took over him around half an hour later.

~~~~~~~

Sylvain and Mercedes was in the usual positions in their sessions but today, he was going to tell her everything he remembers about his brother. Any details at all.

He focus left the notepad and she asked, "Are you ready?"

"As I'll ever be..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Random trivia: Sylvain's necklace is definitely the one he's wearing in his summer alternative. It was originally going to be just a simple necklace but I seen that one and had to add that one instead.  
> Now, with the next chapter.... It will focus on Sylvain as a child until the accident with Miklan so, it's going to be some REAL harsh stuff. Thank you for reading and be safe out there.


	9. Memories (Sylvain) pt. 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *Sylvain's memories are all a blur but there is a few he remembers vividly.*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before I start I want to say I didn't actually write any of the physical abuse in this, (Not big) but it's heavily implied. If that bothers anyone or causes problems, please be mindful and cautious. I couldn't actually work myself up to wrire it. The insulting at a certain point was my limit. I had to actually stop for a few to compose myself.

"Mother! Father! Miklan!" The six year old ran to them happily.

Lily giggled softly at his excitement. Her hair flowing gorgeously down her back and ending at her lower waist. The beautiful white dress ending below her knees bringing out her striking strawberry blonde color. "Sweetie, I'm exhilarated but, don't run in here please. You could hurt yourself. My little dove." She hugged him when he reached her and put his arms around her. She was pushing his hair around and back with her fingers softly.

"He shouldn't run to not look so immature. Why work hard to prove your talent and name when you're going to act like a child after? Straighten yourself up boy." His father's power voice making him pull away. He straightened his suit and adjusted his tie.

"Dear. He IS just a boy. He can celebrate his achievement." She trailed her fingers down his face to calm him from Margrave's words. "You did amazing Sylvain. And now, just a little longer and we'll get to watch Miklan win his age group, right honey?" She pinched the eleven year olds cheek softly.

His stance mirrored their fathers. Tense and straight, hands behind his back and scowling hard enough to cause wrinkles on his forehead. "Mhm." He didn't react to his mother and she frowned.

"It hasn't started yet. You could congratulate Sylvain." She tried to ease the aura around them.

"What? He shouldn't congratulate me! Miklan helped me with my piece. I should thank him instead." Sylvain looked at his older brother. Miklan glanced down and for a moment his frown eased up but, was put back into place by the man's words.

"Is that so? Well I hope that means that his piece is perfect if he had enough time to help you." Margrave spat out.

"I'm sure he'll do wonderfully. Miklan is so talented on the piano. He just brings out so much emotion! It's absolutely beautiful." His mother softly speaking to ease his building temper.

"Hey! What are you- whoa! Stop wriggling so much. I'm going to drop-"

"Put me down! Put me down!"

"Fine, fine. Okay! Here!" An exasperated young voice said giving up to the other.

"Don't run Felix!" A woman hollered at her son. The taps of feet connecting to the tiled floor showing that the child wasn't listening.

At hearing Felix's name Sylvain turned just in time for a smaller child to collide into him. He picked the four year old up and swung him around, both laughing.

Everyone around looked at them sweetly except for two persons. "You were great kid." Glenn, who just turned fourteen said. "Maybe relax your jaw a bit more next time though yeah? Looked like you were about to your crack your teeth." 

Rodrigue came in from behind everyone, "Glenn. He has to focus. If that's what helps him, leave him be."

"Oh... That's okay Mr. Fraldarius." He stopped going in circles but, Felix remained in his arms, being held up. "I'll try to relax better next time Glenn."

After everyone had their pleasantries, they waited for the announcement for Miklan's age group to return to the auditorium. Sylvain was following his father and mother until a small hand stopped him. He looked back and down. "What's up Fe?"

"I wanna sit with you." The little pout on his face making it hard to say no.

"They don't have enough room in the VIP section Felix." Rodrigue told him.

His eyes started shining with unshed tears. Sylvain spoke, "He can sit on my lap."

"Absolutely not. You're not acting so improper." Margrave quickly refused.

"What if he sat with us?" Glenn asked.

"Only if you don't mind." Lily responded before Margrave could refuse again.

"Yay! Come on Syl! Sit next to me." Felix started pulling him their way.

Glenn came back to them after wishing Miklan good luck and took Sylvain's other hand, smirk on his face. "What if he wants to sit next to me? I want to sit next to him too."

"No! He's sitting next to me Glenn!"

"Did you even ask what HE wants? That's pretty mean Felix."

"Hey.. It's okay. I don't-"

"He wants to sit with me! You sit somewhere else."

"Glenn. Stop messing with them." Fana flicked the back of his head. "Let's go get seated."

~~~~~~

Felix sat next to him and latched onto his arm with both of his and stuck his tongue out at Glenn, who just turned and snorted into his palm.

When they got to Miklan's turn, Sylvain watched eagerly. Watching the way his brother completely changed from his uptight nature. Relaxed and composed. He was truly at peace playing the instrument. His fingers tenderly playing the keys and rolling across them effortlessly.

Felix stopped shuffling next to him and watched Miklan with just as much focus. His mouth open in awe.

Near the end of the song Sylvain noticed that a note was slightly off. With the small twitch of Miklan's mouth, he confirmed for sure it was real. It was odd for him to make a mistake. Something must be off with him.

Sylvain took a chance of a look up to his mother and father and like he expected, his father was seething with anger. Lily sitting still, trying to keep her eyes on Miklan.

It's going to be loud tonight..

~~~~~~~

"He won Syl! Both of you did!" Felix was smiling big. 

"Yeah. We did." He returned his own smile to the other. And that should be enough to please father but, he's going to be mad about the mistake.

It's his fault. If he hadn't asked for so much help, Miklan wouldn't have messed up. Dad is still going to blame his brother, even if he said otherwise.

~~~~~~~

All were back in the front of the building, waiting for Sylvain's family. The sunset shining through the windows, tinting the whole area a soft orange. He felt a tug on his hand that was still being held. "Hmm?" 

Looking down at the little boy with his bangs getting pushed back by his tiny hand. His excitement had cooled down and now, he's back to his quiet self. "Are you going to leave now?"

"Not yet. When my parents and Miklan get back I will. We have some time left." He lowered his face closer to Felix so he would lift his head to look at Sylvain. Felix wasn't satisfied with the answer as he lowered his head. Sylvain looked at Glenn for help.

The teen's blue eyes flashed with an idea. "What if we celebrate by treating Miklan and Sylvain to something to eat?" He faced to Rodrigue and Fana for an answer.

"I don't know Glenn." His father said, "Usually we only eat out after-"

"After Felix and I won a match. What's the difference here? It's a victory! They kicked the other's asses!" He groaned in pain when Fana took his ear in her hands and pulled him to her to hear better.

"I told you to quit cussing in front of your brother. If he starts copying your mouth, i'm gonna kick yours." She threatened lowly.

"Don't talk to our children like that Fana." Rodrigue let out weakly with a sigh. "But, we'll ask Margrave and Lily if we can treat them to a victory dinner." His smile growing at all the children grinning now.

~~~~~~~~

The three came out and Sylvain's smile instantly fell. Margrave's steps rough and harsh with the strength he was putting in his strides. His mother's easy smile gone from her face and now etched with tightness in her frown. Miklan looked even worse with frightful worry in his eyes. Looks like their not going to spend extra time with the Fraldarius family tonight.

"Hey. We were waiting for you." Rodrigue walked up, not noticing the rage within Margrave, which Sylvain watched in horror how he didn't notice as Rodrigue put his hand on the others shoulder. "I was wanting to ask if maybe you would mind if we took you all out to dinner? It's on Fana and me of course. Wherever Miklan and Sylvain wish to eat."

"That sounds wonderful! We should take them up on their offer dear." Lily fixed her smile to respond before Margrave refused.

"Hmm... Very well. However, it will just be Sylvain joining you." He looked down at Sylvain with only his eyes. "For playing perfectly and behaving accordingly. Even though Miklan won, he did not perform how he should've. So, i'm saying no to him going. Call me when you get home and I will come get him. Come, Lily, Miklan."

"That's too bad. Some other time then." Rodrigue said. "Let's go everyone. Sylvain you can decide when we get in the car." He wrapped his arm around Fana and they both walked away.

The little tugs he felt on his hand reminded him that he was still holding Felix's hand. His eyes met big amber ones. "Let's go Syl. I'm hungry." He released his hand and ran to Fana to put it in hers, which she granted immediately.

"Right. Sure thing, Fe." He looked once more to his parents.

They had their backs to them, heading back to his brother. Sylvain watched them reach Miklan. His mother pat his shoulder gently and ran two fingers across his shoulder and tapped twice. When his father got to the other side of him, he grabbed Miklan by his other one. When he seen Miklan flinch from the hold, he did as well. At that moment, Miklan looked up and noticed Sylvain. His eyes were wide with fear. But, he just as quickly caught himself and returned back to his normal self. His cold, dead gaze bore into his little brother.

A hand landed on his head. "What's the hold up? You alright?" Glenn came back to get him after they noticed Sylvain hadn't moved from his spot. He seen Glenn looking over to where he was before. Glenn had a look of suspension in his light blue eyes and was also keeping his eyes on the Gautier family.

"What? O-oh! Oh yeah! I'm okay.! Let's go." He backed out from Glenn's hand and continued walking backwards until he was a good couple feet away. And then took off to the car they were waiting at for them, leaving Glenn by himself to look on and wonder what was happening.

~~~~~~~

"So, where do you want to eat Sylvain?" Rodrigue had his hand resting on the passenger seat, looking back to the three in the back.

Felix leaned forward in the middle of the seat, "He likes the place with the flowers."

"Flowers? I don't think I know which one you're talking about." Rodrigue answered confused.

Fana sighed, "He's talking about the small one next to the Eisner's flower shop."

"Yeah! That one." Felix said.

"The Duscan one?" Glenn asked, "Sure, that place is pretty good. The family that run it are nice too. They're gonna expand one day. I just know it."

Sylvain kept his head down the whole ride. 

~~~~~~~~

The first time Miklan said something strange wasn't long after that. The two were in the parlor, Sylvain laying on his stomach in the floor reading and Miklan on the old piano. He was playing the same song over and over and over again.

Sylvain was okay with it, it's nothing new but.... This song was making him uneasy. The way it was being played was different from how he played it normally. This song was supposed to be calming but right now, it's anything but so.

He swallowed and got up to return the book to the shelf. "Hey Miklan? Do you want to go out and play?" The notes kept playing endlessly. He may not of heard him. He got closer and asked again.

Miklan put his hands flat down onto the keys, making a loud, disturbing sound. "Why?" Despite the show if force, there wasn't any in his question.

"Cause, we've been in here for hours." He almost whines, "Let's go do something outside or-." 

"Why? So you can make me look ridiculous again when the next recital comes? I don't think so." His words putting Sylvain aback from his roughness.

"What are you talking about Miklan?" 

"You don't remember?" He laughed unnaturally, "Of course you don't. Why would you? You didn't get in trouble. You got to be treated with Glenn and your little kitten that follows you around everywhere. How ridiculous that I thought you could even remember a SMIDGE of what happened." 

He had such heat behind every word. Sylvain asked, "I don't understand."

"Ugh! You're so annoying! Just leave me alone and go back to your perfect princess life! The further I am from you the better off i'll be!" He stood up and stomped out of the room, Sylvain beginning to tear up with his older brother mad at him.

Lily walked around the mahogany door way. "Little dove, why are you crying?"

"I- I- Miklan- he-" his fingers pushed into his closed lids to try to halt the wetness from slipping through.

"Awww, sweetie..." Her arms were out whilst walking towards him and she pulled him into her chest. "It'll be okay. I promise." The hand lightly going up and down his spine comforted him.

Miklan stopped spending time with him after that.. Everytime Sylvain tried, his brother would try just as hard to avoid him. His father being more quick to anger, leading to fights with his mother. Before long, she stopped sleeping in their bed and slept in one of the guest chambers.

~~~~~~~~~~~

It got worse in roughly a year. He still actively tried to fix whatever happened between his brother and him. And while he didn't ever actually succeed, Miklan didn't do anything more than fuss and bicker at him. 

He attempted to keep everything secret on what was going on but, he couldn't hide it from certain people. Surprisingly, (Or unsurprisingly really) Glenn guessed something was wrong first. 

Both of the brothers were staying with the Fraldarius family for the weekend. Sylvain enjoys it the most since Miklan acts how he used to when they're not at home. Miklan avoids him here too but, not as bad. And even then, with Felix, Sylvain doesn't think about it much. If he does dwell on it, Felix will start pouting from lack of attention. Pulling on his hand, whining to play with him and his feet raising off the ground to the point of his heels are the only part left touching until he got Sylvain to walk with him.

Glenn and him stay to themselves anyway. Always locking both of them up in his room, or taking a walk on the fenced in property. They both get so serious when Miklan is allowed to come. Glenn won't play with the two younger ones as much when Miklan was around. 

It did lead to Felix pouting at first, yet he stopped permanently one day once Glenn pulled him to the side after a particularly loud disagreement from the young amber eyed brother. He didn't look happy, but after Glenn was done, Felix looked up determined and nodded at Glenn stiffly. Soon after, Sylvain and Felix played all day, Felix not stopping long enough for Sylvain to think about anything else. And it always seemed like the two never ran into the older brothers after that.

He did notice however, the plucking of music coming from Glenn's room on occasion. A guitar?

~~~~~~~~~~

"You want to what?" Lily asked Sylvain at the table.

"I um... I want to- to-"

"Stop mumbling and tell us boy."

"I want to learn to play guitar." He rushed out after Margrave's booming voice at the table.

The table was silent, Lily looking to his father for an answer and Miklan refusing to look up from picking around his food with his utensil.

"Why?" His father questioned, "You already know piano. Why learn another?"

If he said the reason was because he seen Miklan in Glenn's room watching the other in interest and he wants Miklan and him to be how they were before. He would absolutely refuse that reason.

"Knowing how to play another instrument will look good on me and our family as well. It would be even better with people seeing one of the future owners of Gautier records know how to play different things." 

He had no idea what he was saying. He's just repeating what Margrave says a majority of the time when he wants them to do something.

His father's eyes sparked with pride. "I see. Excellent idea Sylvain. Miklan," His brother finally looked up, "You should start getting better ideas too, unless you want to get left in the dust by your little brother."

Lily's smile was loving. He smiled back at her.

In the corner of his eye, he seen Miklan give him a nasty look. "Yes, father."

No! That's not what Sylvain wanted at all. He wanted to see Miklan get interested in him again. He wants for him to talk to him, to smile and pat his head in his own awkward way when Sylvain played a song without messing up.

"I'll have lessons start for you as soon as possible. Be sure to keep up your piano lessons too." His father went back to eating. He started pushing his food around his plate.

~~~~~~~~~~~

"Play it again." Felix begged for the third time after Sylvain played the same song for him. Sylvain didn't say anything, happy that Felix is enjoying him playing. It gives him more time to practice too. It's a win-win. He fixed the strap over his shoulder and situated himself.

"You having fun over there?" Both looked up from the strings. Glenn was standing in the light coming from the window they were sitting at, his eyes as blue as sapphires.

"Hey Glenn. Just practicing." Sylvain said to him, one leg hanging and the other propped up on the pillow he put down.

Felix puffed out his cheeks, his legs brought up to his chest, arms around them. "You said you were going to hang out with Miklan when he was here. I'm s'pose to be with Syl." 

"Awww. You can share him for a little bit until Miklan wakes up." Glenn went to the window they were at and picked the pouting boy up and on his lap. Felix only crossed his arms and glared up at Glenn.

"Miklan is asleep? Why?" It was strange for him to sleep in the day.

"He didn't get much sleep last night. He doesn't sleep hardly at all anymore by what he's been telling me. Felix?" He nudged him by knocking his knee up.

"What?"

"Why don't you go and get us something to drink from the fridge?"

"Why me? Why can't you?"

Glenn grinned, "Because you're the youngest and if you don't i'm gonna tell Sylvain what you told me yesterday."

He gasped at his brother, "No! Don't tell him!" He jumped down and ran to the kitchen while he was fussing at his brother. Glenn only chuckled at his little brother rushing down the hall and turning around the corner.

"What did he say?" The red head was curious over what made Felix panic.

"Nu uh uh." He wagged his finger in front of honey eyes. "I told him I wouldn't if he did that."

"Like you've ever cared before." Sylvain started fiddling with the strings again, slightly disappointed that Glenn didn't tell him anyway.

"Maybe in a bit, but this is serious. Humor me a bit yeah?" His fists were clutched in his lap. Sylvain took the guitar and put it near his feet, putting all his focus on Glenn. He gulped and nodded once he was ready. Glenn glanced to the floor, then back to Sylvain. "Miklan is..." He closed his eyes and sighed, not as confident as he was when he decided to say something.

"...What?" The child leaned into himself, getting closer to listen when Glenn would continue. Glenn almost seemed like he didn't want to say anything but, once again he composed himself.

"Miklan is sorry. Sorry for ignoring you. The only reason he's doing it is because, well, he feels like it's safer for you this way."

"Safer for me? I don't get it. How is he keeping me safe by being a jerk?" Frowning at Glenn in disbelief.

"All I can say is, if you don't understand, it must be working." Gleen dusted off non-existent dust off his lap before standing up, but not moving away yet. He turned his side to Sylvain after stretching. "He's trying his best. I don't think he's doing the right thing but, I can't just go against him or he won't tell me anything anymore."

"That's..." Sylvain looked down, moving his feet across the soft, dark carpet. The feel of it grounding him.

"He thinks you're getting better by the way. He likes hearing you play." Trailing to his ears softly coming from the teen. Glenn turned only his head back to him, his hair that barely touched his shoulders swaying with the motion. "He thinks i'm still the best though. Gonna have to work harder for that title." Glenn waved his hand and walked only to stop and back up.

"Also, with what Felix said.... If you ever tell me around the same thing or I know you think the same way...." He took a serious turn, furrowing his brows at Sylvain and pointing at him, "I'll throw your ass in the river.. And i'm not joking."

"You didn't tell me what he said though." Sylvain got out after Glenn left the room. He moved his hand to pick up his guitar, smile now present. Miklan listens to him. And he likes it too. He's not happy that he had Glenn to tell him but that's okay... They'll get this fixed. Whatever is going on.

Felix barreled his way in, sliding from the speed he was going and almost lost his balance before getting to Sylvain and grabbing his hand. 

"Felix? Um-"

"C'mon, hurry! Hurry before Glenn does it!" He was tugging insistently with excitement? Worry? "Hurry, Syl."

"Okay. Let me- Ah!" Felix had some power in his small frame. "A-at least let me put my shoes on." Felix gave him just enough time to slid his shoes over his feet, his shoes folding underneath his heels.

"Our drinks are in our hideout. We have to go there." Felix was still pulling him around with his tiny pale hand.

As soon as Sylvain opened his mouth to question why, Glenn's voice rumbled through the walls of the house. "Dammit! Felix! You little shit! You're gonna get it!" The thumping pattern on the floor giving away that he was now running.

"What did you do Felix?" His question was hitched when Felix picked up the pace and laughed, still running as fast as he could manage.

His eyes lowering down at Sylvain, his grin on the verge of being sinister. He's getting more and more playful these days with jokes that piss Glenn off. "I shook up his drink." 

"You what!?" 

"We're almost there Syl." And just as quickly, his attitude went back to the adorable Felix that Sylvain didn't much care about Glenn chasing them, sticky drink all in his hair and on his shirt.

~~~~~~~~~~

The silent times he spent in his room now were nice. Just knowing that his brother was next door in his own room listening was enough to keep him going. His days at home was always busy from homework, lessons and tutors. The brothers used to have all these together but once Miklan put most of his time into piano, he jumped far ahead of Sylvain in it.

However, when it came to academics, Sylvain seemed to excel at, he was taking math and literature lessons far past his age level. Margrave always smirked and pat his head too hard when he succeeded in anything. His mother's mood improvement and Sylvain knowing that Miklan wasn't staying away cause he wanted to made him try harder.

While he appreciated his father's acknowledgment, he never seeked it out. In fact, he would prefer NOT to get it. Everytime he was praised, Miklan was put down. Margrave using Sylvain's younger age to get to him, saying that he must not be THAT good if a child almost five years younger can do just as satisfactory or surpass him.

The younger tried to help Miklan yet, when he spoke up, Lily would silence him somehow, saying it would only make it worse. The festering feeling inside his stomach got worse after every situation she managed to block his attempt of lending a hand.

The little comments turned to their father straight up insulting him.

Insulting became going into his brother's room at night to yell at him. Sylvain could only pull the covers over his head and pray that it would end soon. 

~~~~~~~~~

He was at the Fraldarius house again. His weekends spent here when he was allowed. He could relax and get actual good night's sleep here. Felix's room was so bright and colorful compared to his. Felix's bed was grey with small navy undertones and his curtains slightly different from the navy on his bed, but not enough to really notice unless you really focused long enough.

The huge rug overtop his carpet on the floor so fluffy that it was so easy to fall asleep on. They have done so before. Most evenings after running around and causing mischief, which led to them being sent to Felix's room for the rest of the day until supper. Once they were "confined" so to speak (They were actually afraid to poke the beast a bit too much, which was Fana or Glenn depending on who they messed with for the day), Felix and him would play in his room, ranging from board games until Felix got mad he kept losing, to playing video games. Felix would always fall asleep watching the TV, his cheek resting on his arms, bright eyes heavy with each moment passing.

Sylvain kept an eye on him secretly, waiting for his breathing to slow before stopping, saving the game and turning it off to lay down next to him. Elbow holding him up, he looked over the the face in front of him. Eyelashes resting on ivory cheeks.His cheek was even more chubby with it being pushed up from the force. Two fingers reached out and...

*Squish.*

"Mmmhmm?." Felix stirred, Sylvain let his hand drop down as sleepy eyes opened. "Sylvain?" He rubbed his eyes.

"Yeah?"

"Don't pinch my cheeks." He slurred/pouted.

"Sorry. They were really poochy. I couldn't help myself." He tried (and failed ) not to laugh.

He stopped rubbing his eyes to glare at Sylvain. It was about as ferocious as a kitten hissing for the first time. "I want to pinch you back, but i'm too tired.." He crawled closer to Sylvain and it made Sylvain sit up quickly, thinking Felix was going to- "What are you doing?" He stopped.

"Uh! I- I don't know..." Why did he flinch away like that? Felix was just going to lay closer to him so Sylvain could play through the other's hair until they both fell asleep.

"Are you okay?" His tilted head and worried expression made Sylvain panic.

"Yeah! Yeah, no.. I'm fine. Sorry.." He rubbed the back of head, his hair messing up more.

"It's okay. Are you sure you're okay?" Felix got on his knees and slapped his palm on Sylvain's forehead. "You don't feel warm.." He removed his hand and switched it with his own forehead..... "Nope. Not at all, but you look kinda pale. You should eat more at dinner time okay?"

"Okay?" 

"Sleepy..." He fell down onto Sylvain, his arms hugging him closer.

"Ahh!" Where is this strength coming from!? If it wasn't for the softness of the rug, his head would be hurting. One of his arms wrapped around Felix, pulling him closer, the other automatically went to black hair like a magnet. Running through his hair always put him at ease. Made him think of nothing, just laying there with Felix.

His own little paradise, where nothing could go wrong. And even if it did, they still had each other.

"You're so warm."

~~~~~~~~~

One night, his mother came into his room. She slowly shut the door in his dark room to not make a sound. She removed the dark colored comforter from his head. 

The honey in his eyes glittering from tears and the moonlight from his balcony window. "Mom? Why-" 

A nail landed on his small lips. She put her other finger up to her own and shushed him. She made room in his bed for herself and brought him into her. She stroked through his red locks after placing his head on her chest. "My little dove. It's okay. It'll be over soon."He snuggled deeper into her warmth. 

He heard a crashing sound. She quickly yanked him back down when he jerked up. "No. Don't leave." The shouting was getting bad. He started shaking. Palms covered both his ears. The sounds were muffled and they echoed through his ears.

He was lulled to sleep slowly and fearfully. His mother's humming only making the other sounds more terrifying. He hoped that Miklan was going to be okay.

Miklan didn't show up for breakfast that morning and Sylvain didn't see him the rest of the day.

After that night, his mother started sleeping in his bed.

~~~~~~~~~

He finally worked up the courage one night to go to his brother's room after Margrave left the room. He waited until his mother fell into deep slumber and silently walked out of his moonlit room and down the dark hallway until he made it to his brother's door.

Testing the knob, it wasn't locked. He must have stood there for a long time, he felt the twisting door knob under his closed palm. The door pulled him into the the pitch black bedroom. Carefully and gently tugging futher into unseen darkness.

"You shouldn't have come in here." A whisper, "If he finds out, he'll get you too." Miklan shut the the door behind Sylvain, leaning on it.

"I don't care." Sylvain whispered back harshly. "I can't take not talking to you anymore. Whatever I did, i'm sorry." His face fell to the carpet that had items strown all across it. Miklan always had his room clean so seeing it like this.... Does he clean the mess every night that their dad comes in?

Fingers lightly pulled at his sleeve. Both honey eyes looked into each other. "I don't know what to do.." 

Light came in through the window after the clouds passed by the moonlight. And then he noticed it. A big nasty green and blue bruise on Miklan's jaw and around his eye. "What happened to you? Are you okay?" With his words, Miklan turned away as if burned by his words.

He didn't think he'd get an answer but he did. "I did something I wasn't supposed to..." Sylvain had to slide closer to hear.

"What?" With the size they were it must have been pretty bad. He didn't answer him after that. Those seven words is all he's going to get. But he can't give up yet. "I'll help you. Just tell me what you want."

"You can't."

"But why?"

Miklan bit his lip hard. Fighting an inner battle. They sat in stagnant silence for so long until, "Father is training me."

Sylvain was confused. Training? "For what?"

"To take over his business."

"Gautier Records?"

"No. The other one."

"Other one?" He said slowly. "He has another one? What is it?"

"If I tell you, could you get someone to help?"

Help him with the company? His question knocked Sylvain's thoughts around. "Is it hard?"

"Very. But that's not what I mean. I want you to get help."

"Mom?"

"No. Not mom. Please.. " Miklan was starting to shake and Sylvain could only tell from the fingers still holding his long sleeve night shirt.

"I will. What is it?" He wanted to reach out but he stayed in place, on his knees, afraid he would push Miklan away again somehow.

"This business is bad. It's a secret but, a lot of people know about it as well." He was talking fast. It took all of the younger brothers concentration to take in what was being said. "I want you to tell someone, ANYONE who will believe you. But, I want you to promise that you won't say anything to our parents that I told you."

"I promise. I promise." His whispering answers were getting hectic. Saying whatever his brother wanted to hear to get him say what he needed.

"Mom and dad.. They-"

The door to his room creaked open slowly. Miklan's hands shook, his body taught and tight like a bow string. Sylvain only watched the light slowly cover Miklan's room. Seeing it now with small burst of light, his room is worse than how he pictured it. It was messier than Sylvain's room, and he left a mess ranging from papers, books, board games and all sorts of different things he has interest in at the time. Lily would clean it every day. Maybe she would clean Miklan's too if he asked.

The door finally halted as far as the bolts would allow. Lily's body casting a big shadow over them. She was smiling down at Sylvain, not even glancing at his brother. "There you are. I woke up and didn't see you dove." With the first step she took into the room, Miklan jumped up off his knees off the carpet, and made as much distance between her and him as he was able.

The thud coming from his desk hitting the wall was deafening in the uncomfortable quiet room. Miklan was leaning back on it, his fingers clutching the edge of the desk hard. Lily didn't look up from the floor, dark grey eyes locked onto Sylvain. "What are you doing in here? It's late. Not time to play yet." Her voice slightly louder than a whisper.

"But Miklan-"

"Needs his rest. You shouldn't have came in here to bother him. Right?" Sweet tone becoming flat.

"Y-yes. That's right." Miklan stuttered out. "You should leave now, Sylvain..." He put his head down.

"But-but I-" Lily clutched his wrist and yanked him up without hurting him.

"You can talk once he has the time." Sylvain wanted to pull back, to fight but, with Miklan just sitting there and his mother tugging him with strength unexpected, he gave up. He let himself be brought back to his room, his mother tucking him in beside her.

~~~~~~~~~~

He acted like he fell right to sleep and waited.

Waited. Waited and waited until...

The bed shifted. She was getting up. He felt her run her warm hands through his locks and she got up from the bed and just as quietly as she could, left his room. She was walking down to Miklan's room.

Sylvain bolted up just as fast as he could without making noise and knelt down, knees touching the wall and putting his ear up against it.

"-ke you. We don't need two defective children. You can't be saved but he can." Sylvain scrunched his eyes in confusion. Miklan is sick? With what?

There was no response from his brother. His mom made a scoffing noise before she continued. "I knew it was a bad idea to let you go to that house. I told him you and the older one were a bit TOO close. How his parents are okay with this, i'll never know. Sylvain knows the difference, why can't you?"

His brother finally answered quietly, "You don't know that. Him and Felix-"

"Are too young to understand right now. Sylvain likes girls. He is perfect. You on the other hand," She breathed in deep and agitated, "Are a disappointment." She laughed through her throat, "Do you honestly think that you two could be something? Glenn is a perfect student who does everything he's told and then some. If anything, he's just experimenting with you to see if he is into men. Being with you would ruin him."

"That's not true."

"Oh really? Did you know his grades are dropping? Apparently, he's not been paying much attention in class. You've been telling him about your small issues without realizing the burden you're putting on him."

"They're not small. He listens to me and doesn't think i'm lying. He always takes my side and you and father can't stand it." He got a little loud at first, but lowered his anger as his words came.

Building laughter that made Sylvain gasp and straighten up tight. Her laugh was psychotic. She took a couple gasping breaths in between her laughter. "Is that so? Well then I assume that means he knows about how you're doing Sylvain?" He must of reacted somehow because she then said, "Yeah, I know what you've been doing with him. You think Glenn would even look at you after he finds out you do those things? Haha! You're delusional."

"You're wrong. He wouldn't abandon me. No matter what. That's what he told me."

"Prove it then. I give you permission to do whatever you want. And he has to know as well. Otherwise you'll be punished."

"Punished?"

"You'll have to find out if it turns out you were wrong. But you know Glenn so well so, I doubt you will be right?" Sickly sweet coming out of her mouth with poison running behind it. "I have to leave before my little one wakes up and wonders where I am. YOU don't make it easy to keep him the way he needs to be." He heard Miklan's door close.

Shoot! He hopped up and ran back to his bed, throwing the sheets and blanket back over him and honey eyes closed tightly. The bed fell next to him. Her hand ran through his hair once more and he tried not to jump.

"You will always be my boy. I'll make sure of it." He felt ice all the way up his back.

~~~~~~~~

It happened again.

The next morning and the ones recurring after, Miklan wasn't present at the table with him. His father also stopped as well, leaving only Sylvain and Lily to themselves. When he would see his brother, Miklan looked in simple terms, awful and worn down. Sylvain was sure that he'd seen bruises in different places in the few times he would see his brother when they passed by each other.

His mother, though as she always was with him, didn't quite seem the same. She didn't spend any time with Margrave anymore and she down right acted as if Miklan didn't exist, turning from him sourly when he would say anything to her. All she did was spend every moment with Sylvain when she could, preferring to pamper and praise him for meaningless tasks that he himself felt weren't necessary. And that treatment was what made Miklan begin to act violently.

~~~~~~~~

It was Felix's birthday this week and he had wanted to have a sleepover for the weekend to have fun longer with Sylvain, Dimitri and Ingrid. Rodrigue and Fana agreed but, Ingrid had to stay in a different room for "reasons." Felix didn't understand and whined about Ingrid feeling left out for having to sleep in a different room and it would be unfair. When his parents said the reasoning was Sylvain, Felix threw a fit and said he could sleep in his bed with him instead of in the makeshift beds that the others would have in the floor. He was stubborn and unmoving until they relented reluctantly.

Miklan managed to stop him a few days before and asked if he wanted to go hunt with him on Thursday night and they could stay in the cabin once they're done. It was strange and odd that Miklan was being so nice. By this time he'd already pushed, shoved and hit Sylvain a few times when the younger would go to his room to question him about what he said so long ago.

Why would he not tell him now?...

~~~~~~~~~

"You seriously got him that?" Miklan spat out, looking at the little stuffed lion Sylvain was placing down into a decorated box and tying it. The bow looked better than previous attempts but, it still didn't look as good as mom's when she tied them. "He's still such a child."

"Yeah." Answering without looking up. "He likes cats. All kinds. He told me that his last one had to be thrown away because Dimitri accidentally tore it and the damage was too bad and Fana couldn't fix it."

"Didn't have to tell me all that." He said just as hateful.

Then why did you ask? He wanted to say but didn't on the fact that they were now in the cabin and alone. Which meant Miklan didn't have to hold back if he didn't want to.

"Cut up some wood for later tonight. I'm going out before it gets dark." Getting up with waiting for Sylvain to Answer and picking up his bow and arrows.

"Ahh-wait. Miklan, I-he's gone already." Throwing his hand out to his brother and letting it droo heavy back to his side. "I guess he's not going to tell me now..." Eyes closed in defeat before he exhaled and got to his feet. Sylvain was wanting to go with him. He didn't know how to use a bow though so maybe that's why Miklan didn't want him to go. It is supposed to get a little cold tonight. Probably best that he stay here and do the fire wood.

~~~~~~~~~

It took a while to get the hang of it without help. The axe is heavier than what he expected, he's feeling how sore his body is going to be. He has to cut up enough for tonight. It's so hard, he wants to give up but if he does.... Miklan will-

He didn't want to think about that. "Just do what he says and don't say anything to make him mad. I can do this. It's just for today and morning until we leave, no problem." He spoke out trying to convince himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh. Back to twelve hours at work again. So understaffed. Sorry it's taking so long on these chapters. I wish I could put them out sooner. All this pandemic madness is crazy. I hope everyone is staying safe.


	11. Through the window

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The rest of the week after Sylvain and Mercedes talk about his past. Following different people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Going back to a different shift after this. Schedule is crazy. Lol. I hope everyone is still doing okay. This chapter might be a bit confusing since i'm jumping through so many different people. Death scene in this chapter, be careful if this bothers you.

"Hey Mercedes? Can we stop for now?" He was afraid to ask but, he didn't know if he could say anymore.

"Of course." Without a beat.

"Really? We can?"

"Yes." She started putting her papers in a neat stack. There were so many notes. She never left with so many before.

"You're not mad are you? I can say more if you want." His breathing started to pick up.

"Do you want to? If so, we can." She said sweetly. She sat comfortably, with her hands in her lap.

"Do you want me to?"

She lowered her eyes sadly, not losing her smile. "Sylvain, it doesn't matter what I want. This is about you, not me." 

"So you want me to?"

She shook her head. "I want what you want. If you talk about your past or not at all, it makes no difference." The face he made, she's confusing him. Her hand rose up and landed on her upper chest near her heart, fingers extended, "As long as you leave this room feeling less weight here than before, I got what I wanted."

He felt a pang in his chest. She means everything she says and she's always been this way ever since she came here two years ago. Why he's waited so long to actually talk about his problems with her, he doesn't know. He's mentally drained, he's so sore but, it's true. The weight he's felt, it's not as heavy right now.

"I thought just sharing my thoughts was absurd and blocking them out would be better. Why just talk? It won't help with what happened. I was wrong." He mirrored her actions and put his own hand up. "It hurts but, I feel lighter. Like when Felix is near me."

"He's always been with you, hasn't he?" With the bit he's told her, the times with Felix and his friends... Was the only relief he had. His home life.. It was worse than she thought. And his mother... He obviously loved her by keeping her necklace she gave him.

Her eyes went to the drawer the necklace was in. His mother.... Mercedes didn't know how to place her yet. Lily obviously abused Miklan, but did she Sylvain? Patients aren't allowed to wear jewelry in here but, they could if they went out. "He has. He's what keeps me going." Sylvain answered her and she looks back to him. He says that with such an expression? "I just wish he would trust me enough to tell me when something is wrong."

She thought of his outburst the night before. She didn't want to believe what Seteth told her but maybe he's right. "Do you remember when you kept turning him away?" His hanging head nodded. "This. In a way, is the same thing Sylvain."

"But I was doing it to help him. What he's doing isn't-"

"I'm sure he'll tell you when he's ready."

"This isn't something you tell when ready. He could get seriously hurt if he waits Mercedes." He sat up straight.

"Before you were admitted here, wouldn't he have said the same to you?" Sylvain's eyes went wide. "You're safe now and because of that and getting the help you needed, you have realized how wrong it was to be treated the way you were. You didn't say anything because you felt you weren't worth the trouble, correct?"

She asked this question and thought that he would want to end their session early. This might be a bit much but, he's opened up so much today, she wants to see if he will push further.

He lowered his sight to the floor, the mixing colors of the tiles pulling him into them while his thoughts scrambled in his mind. Is this really the same? "So, this could be all my fault? He's just doing what I did." Hiding it from everyone to keep face.

"No." Her head shook, smile gone." No Sylvain, this isn't your fault. You've told me about his rocky relationship with Dimitri and his father before. They weren't like this until after Felix's brothers death right?" 

"Well, Dimitri has been struggling for longer than that. Glenn was just the tipping point. He's never got help with it. With Rodrigue, I was surprised to hear that he spends his off days drinking. As far as I knew, he was handling it as well as he could." He let out a petty laugh, "Shows what I knew."

~~~~~~~~

His feet are cold and wet. Walking through the grass back into the wooded part of the property was a bad idea this late (or early) in the morning. He couldn't sleep from the nightmare he kept having of his father's death, his mother leaving him. The sky is barely starting to light up but the sun is still out of his sight.

He shouldn't be out here but, he needs to do something to distract his thoughts or his father will come back, looking through him as if he was to blame for his death. And if he stays in his sight long enough he'll begin to whisper. Whisper such awful things, cursing the ones who killed him, damning his mother that left their child, then say the reasons why this happened, why Dimitri deserved it.

No.

No. He can't think like that. That's not right. None of it was his fault. His thoughts are messing him up.

He trudged along, his palms sliding on the bark of every tree he passed, all wet from the morning fog, the grass even more so. This early morning air will help calm him. It always does.

But something is off this morning. It's very quiet, too quiet. It's eerie and unsettling. It's making his stomach fill with nerves, and his breathing is getting heavier. Maybe he should just turn around and head back inside. Fana will fuss at him for going out without shoes and a jacket as she always does.

However there's also something else stronger telling him to keep going. Just a little more. Just a little farther.

He seen something down in the grass a few meters away, he walked up and picked it up.

"A knife?" It looked quite familiar, the handle looked like- Ah right! This is the one the Fraldarius family had custom made for Glenn for becoming captain recently. They included Dimitri of course to make him not feel left out but it doesn't bother him, not really.

But why is it here? Glenn never goes anywhere without it.

Oh well, Dimitri figured he'd take it back to the house later. He clutched it within his hands and continued on. There was something in the distance, the fog was covering most of the figure. It looks like a pair of legs in a weird and awkward position. Is Glenn up early too? It's not too uncommon for him to be up some mornings and for Dimitri to stumble upon him.

He usually gets scolded for being up so early, then Glenn will pat the spot next to him. The two would then talk about their worries and troubles. It helps, to know that someone like Glenn has problems that he himself is still unsure how to fix.

But that morning, the quiet deserted area that Dimitri walked into wasn't peaceful or comforting. He called out to Glenn and there was no response. The fog was so thick. His hand became visible and.... Was that a gun in his hand? The pit of his stomach dropped and his breath hitched, he called out again, voice a smidge hectic. 

His dazed eyes, no longer clear and bright like two polished sapphires looked out to nothing. The small hole caused by the gun taking Dimitri's attention from his eyes.

He didn't feel his feet losing strength as he fell to his knees. "G-Glenn?" 

The body in front of him didn't move. He got closer using his knees and hands, he couldn't seek out the strength to stand. "Glenn. Please say something." He received the same answer as before.

He finally made it close enough to touch Glenn. He was positioned on the side of the older. Glenn was leaning up against a trunk, the gun in his hand barely touching his fingers. Dimitri worked up the nerve to finally put his fingers to Glenn's wrist to search for a pulse, body heat, something.

So cold...

His hand jerked away, he fell back onto his back from the force. He pulled back up. "Glenn... Glenn!" He went back and started shaking him by his shoulders. "Answer me back. This isn't funny.. I know this is just a joke. Your jokes aren't funny when you take them this far you know?!" Wavy, navy, shoulder length hair flying back and forth after the low ponytail fell away from Dimitri's force, messing up and getting all in his face. "Glenn! Stop this!"

He stopped after an endless circle of yelling and shaking of the younger adult. Dimitri letting his hands tighten their grip on Glenn's shoulders. This can't be happening.. Dimitri pressed his thumbs down right between the shoulders and collarbone. He realeased his hold and with one final attempt he pinched a pale, cold cheek. Doing the same that the older would do to Felix and him when he was trying to wake them up or get their attention.Tears were falling endlessly when there was nothing. Not even a flinch.

"Glenn.... No.... Please wake up...GLENN!"

~~~~~~~

"NO! GLENN!" Dimitri rose up quickly, hand reaching out in front of him. Sweat pouring, covering his body, pajamas and sheets.

Moments passed with hard breaths and his arm out, reaching for the impossible. With a shaky sigh, he let his hand fall and placed his face in his palm. Another night of nightmares. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he seen a flash of dark blue. With a small gasp, he checked to see what it was, there wasn't anything there. He's going to start seeing things from not sleeping well again. He rubbed his eyes then pushed his hair back. It's damp, he needs to freshen up before getting ready. He needs something to drink first.

Reaching for his phone to check the time, he hit something and made it fall to the floor. After looking, it was a bottle of water.

"When did I bring that up here?" He picked it up and downed almost half before he stopped. He then tapped the screen on his phone. He's up an hour earlier than his alarm. Better than usual at least. Must be a good thing since he can wash up and not have to rush.

~~~~~~~

Going down the stairs, fixing his tie over his uniform but only making it worse he paused halfway down. An aroma that made his stomach remind him he hasn't ate yet. It doesn't smell like it's burning. Mondays Rodrigue always burns it if he is able to get up in time but, most times he sleeps all morning and Dimitri just has to pick through the cabinets or fridge to find something.

At least breakfast seems appealing after his dream. He was expecting to see Rodrigue over the oven top, coffee in one hand and whatever utensil he picked up to make whatever it was that was smelling good. He didn't expect to see Felix there instead, hair back completely, wearing an apron over his uniform to keep anything from hitting it.

Felix turned to him after the floor creaked under his weight. Felix's eyes flicked up and down at him before scowling. He's already in a bad mood. "Good morning Felix." He took off the cap of his water and sipped on it, unable to keep looking into the others gaze. He sat down at the table and remained quiet, playing around with his hands on the table.

Even when Felix's steps sounded on the floor he kept his head down. This is just-

A closed fist forced its way into his view and opened up to a little white tablet resting on the palm of Felix's hand. "Take it."

Dimitri looked down at it in mild surprise before looking up to Felix finally. Felix was facing away from him now. "What is it?"

His frown was turning more into a pout, "It'll help with the soreness and fatigue."

Is he... "I appreciate the offer Felix, but i'm okay.

"Stop. I don't want to hear it. Quit being stubborn."

"Felix. Really, I-"

"If you don't take it, i'm shoving it in whether you want me to or not." He wasn't serious. If his slight reddening cheeks and full on pout was anything to go by. With a small defeated smile, Dimitri took the pill from him.

"Is it okay to take this early?"

"I take it some mornings. It's fine idiot." He put his back to Dimitri and went back to the counter, pouring a white liquid into a inside grill, stirring slowly. "It'll be done in a few minutes, go find a mirror and fix your tie. It's driving me up the wall."

"Yes, of course." He stood up and swallowed the pill with the last bit of water.

~~~~~~~

Felix sat a little food to the side and placed it in a plate, sitting it in the microwave after covering it. He took a small notepad on the fridge and wrote something on a slip, slapping the paper onto the microwave.

He came back and sat down loudly across Dimitri. Dimitri watched him closely. Felix handled blue eyes on him for a few minutes before he snapped out, "What?"

"You don't usually stay here school mornings. Most of the time you're gone by the time I get up. What's the occasion?" Felix looked at him like he was going to call him-

"Did you seriously already forget you dumbass?" 

"You shouldn't curse like that at the table.. What do you mea- oh! You're cooking school mornings now aren't you? Forgive me. It must have slipped my mind."

"Hmph. Whatever, shut up and eat your food already."

"Thank you for breakfast Felix. It looks great." Dimitri took two of the biscuits off the plate and began breaking them into pieces. "I didn't think you could make gravy." 

"What do you mean by that?" 

"It's not an insult." Dimitri rushed out as soon as Felix's eyes lowered. "I just remember when Rodrigue tried it- well, it- um.."

"It was too thick you mean." He finished, his expression passive, running the gravy over his own plate.

"Yes! When I first seen it, I thought it was mashed potatoes." He chuckled, "I think I hurt his feelings since he didn't try to make it anymore after that."

"I said the same thing." He didn't join in with the laughter. Dimitri did notice how one side of his lip twitched up.

They ate in silence. Felix cleaning the plates after and sitting them out to dry. Dimitri offered to help, except Felix said he didn't want to have to buy more plates, leaving The blonde to sulk at the table. "That was really good Felix. It's been awhile since I enjoyed a meal that much." He let out.

"It's just cooking. Anyone can do it." His red cheeks were returning.

"I really appreciate it. I eat just whatever most mornings. So, to get an actual breakfast is welcome."

"Would you shut up already? Just eat your damn food." Dimitri had to hide his grin from how red his face is getting.

~~~~~~~~~

"Felix? What are you doing? We should go now." Dimitri watched from the door as Felix took a glass of water and a small box to Rodrigue's office.

"The stupid old man drank too much last night and passed out in here. He'll need this when he gets up."

Dimitri waited, holding their bags until Felix came up to him, frown back on his face. "What's wr-"

"Are you serious? I can't believe how- ugh! Forget it. You're hopeless."

"He-ey! What-" The harsh tug at his collar made him question what was happening until the tie was pulled and woven in front of him. His tongue was twisted from the close proximity. Felix doesn't willingly get this close to him. He can see the light colored ribbon in his hair and can also get a small hint of the scent of his shampoo. It's the same kind Glenn used..

Felix paid no mind to him, putting the final touch to fixing the tie. "Have you always been this much of a wreck getting to school?" He put distance between them after.

"This is what I always do so, yes."

Felix responded with something that was a groan and a sigh. "Let's just go to school. I don't know how much more I can take."

"Okay. Are we walking? Or should I drive since your father isn't working today?" Dimitri faced over to the shorter.

"Walk." He took his bag from the blonde and kept walking past the vehicle.

"Are you sure? You seem tired."

"You barely slept. Like I want a sleep deprived moron driving anywhere. Besides," he barely turned back to Dimitri, "The fresh air might fix your stupidity."

Dimitri shook his head in amusement and followed behind.

~~~~~~~~

"He told you that much?" Marianne and Mercedes was sitting across from each other at the table. 

"I'm a little surprised myself honestly."

"What do you think?" She asked quietly.

"I-" She really didn't know. Sylvain has told her so much. However it only raises more questions than answers. She believed that it was his brother that abused him but, the mother and father as well? And no one noticed? Paid attention? Or didn't bother to? The only one who seemed to know something was Glenn. At least, that's what she gathered. She can't ask him what he thought or knew. Felix might know. She could ask him what Glenn told him. But would he even remember? He must have been only around five or six when that happened.

"I couldn't tell you... I'm baffled, speechless. I have no idea where to start." She closed her violet eyes and lowered her head to think. "I thought knowing more would help me decide on what and how to help him but.... I'm right back where I started." She rose her fingers to her forehead exhausted, thinking of yesterday.

Her other hand resting on the table had weight settle on top. Marianne firmly grasped and smiled. "You're not alone. I'll help in any way I can. I may not be his head doctor, but I want to help him too." Her soft voice somehow became even more so, "They've been through enough."

"Thank you Marianne. Truly."

~~~~~~~~

"Are you working today Ingrid?" Felix randomly asked while they were walking down the hall toward their lockers, school bell ringing the last time of the day.

"No. I have practice, then i'm going to go get something to eat with Dorothea." She heard a scoff in response. She looked over next to her. "She's really not that bad. You should give her a chance."

"Right. Sure." He had his scowl on full force, yet there was a hidden unsure tension underneath.

"Felix, i'm telling you. There is nothing you need to worry about. Sylvain he-"

"Has only seen her once and the last two days has barely spoke to me over the phone." He said so calmly, causing Ingrid to stop walking beside him. He went ahead a few more steps and stopped. He didn't turn around. "What else am I suppose to think?"

"Felix....." Her arms fell from her bag at his shoulders moving in. He almost looked like he was trying to hide within himself. "I don't know what you think thier relationship is.." She walked up and placed her hand on his shoulder. She tried not to notice the shaking stiffness. "But with what I seen, they're not like that."

"You've seen them together once." Bitterness seeping out with each word, "How do you know they weren't just faking where you were with them?"

"....... Do you really have such little faith in him?" Her words flipped his insides.

"W-what- that's not what i'm-" 

She wanted to stop at how vulnerable he sounded but she can't, not now after she's said it. "You say you trust him then? If that's true, even if she wanted to, he wouldn't betray you." She made her voice calm, but stern. Felix will only think she's pitying him if she's too nice about it.

"You don't get it. He's- i'm-" His nose wrinkled with the sour face overcoming him. "You couldn't possibly understand why."

"If you would tell me I might get a better understanding." He finally slapped her hand off of him.

"Don't you have softball practice to get to? I'll see you tomorrow." He walked off, not looking back once.

And just like that, he closes himself off again. She crossed her arms and sighed defeatedly. "They're so much alike it's exhausting."

"Who is?" 

She jumped and looked behind her, face automatically turning just as sour as Felix before he left. "Didn't you learn Sunday that you should stop trying to get involved in Felix's personal life?" Claude didn't much react, eyes slightly flinching. If it wasn't for Ingrid's perception, she would have missed it. "It's obvious you two's personalities grind together like sandpaper."

"I can't be curious?"

"I didn't say that. All i'm saying is, you can't say things like that and expect him to like you. Saying what you did was one of the worst you could say to Felix."

"Ah, I see.." He fiddled with the braid hanging from his head, "I only know what I do from Dimitri. He did tell me that their relationship is that Felix tolerates him at best."

"They have their days." 

"So, I wanted to ask you something." The hand on his braid slid down, palm on his neck. He looked bashful. Claude bashful? What the heck is going on?

"Yes?"

"How would I go about apologizing to him? He's so... Felix. I don't know how exactly I could without him taking it wrong. Will he even take it?"

This is unexpected. Ingrid couldn't help but laugh a bit before answering him. "Well, as long as you don't take this info i'm giving you to tease him more, i'll tell you. It's a PRETTY complicated thing to apologize to Felix and him accept it." Let's see how well he handles some teasing.

"Oh man, I was afraid of that. I knew this was going to be hard to get on his good side." His hand slid a bit lower, falling to his side. "What do I have to do?"

"Okay. You ready?" His green eyes focused and he nodded. "Here it is." She went up closer to him, "When you apologize to Felix, be sure to-" Claude leaned in closer, "Be as honest and sincere as you can."

"....."

"....."

"And?"

"And what?"

"What else?"

"There's nothing else. That's all." She leaned to one side, her arms crossed and relaxed, smirk being bit away on the inside of her mouth. 

He got a bit irritated, "You just said it was complicated. If that's all, that's not hard."

"For people like you Claude, it is hard." His ever present smile dropped.

He took a hot inhale, "And what exactly are you getting at?"

"When you say sorry, you play a joke soon after you say it. You want him to take down his walls for you but continue to keep yours up." She explained, "Not all that fair now is it?"

She has a point. Claude remained quiet. Replaying her response. He looked back to her when she sighed loud and spoke again.

"Look, I get it. I know too well. Sylvain is like that too.... Or he used to be. If he can do it, you can i'm sure." She seen his green eyes flicker in intrigue.

"That name again. Just who is this mystery Sylvain?" Ingrid frowned at him. "Okay. No prying." He rose his hand up in surrender, "I only want some pointers to help me apologize to him, I swear Ingrid. I have no ulterior motives."

"I already told you what to do."

"How do you know he won't just kick my ass after?"

"He might but, you just have to take that chance. He's like a storm, he'll either pass right over you or he'll absolutely tear down everything in his path. But, I think you'll be fine." She waved to excuse herself to go to the lockers to change.

"What does that mean?" His voice raising to reach her. Claude wasn't getting this at all. Why can't she just tell him exactly what to say. She can't just say that and walk away.

She stopped and turned back and... That was a rare smile. So soft and open, eyes low and full of happiness. "It's a secret that i'll let you know."

That's a cute smile. "A-a secret?" He can't joke with this. It's so unexpected and threw him off kilter.

"You just have to be yourself. No walls, no jokes. You'll start seeing a whole new side to him if you do that. Felix has always had a weakness for sincerity and honesty." She chuckled out the last sentence. "Even if he acts like he doesn't. You'll see what I mean." She disappeared behind a corner shortly after.

"Just be myself huh?" He put his hand on his nape and rolled his neck, relieving the tightness. "I guess I could do that."

~~~~~~~

"Good job everyone. Let's keep up this pace. We do and we'll have this next game in the bag." The coach dismissed them and Ingrid was ready to head out. After getting out of the school shower and going through her locker to find her outfit. Dorothea told her to wear pants. Why? She didn't know.

Redoing her braid, she seen the light on her phone showing she had a message. Dorothea was waiting out front of the school. She put everything in place, taking her duffel bag and throwing it over her shoulder.

She made it to the entrance and there was a group of students surrounding Dorothea. She got within earshot and heard the jumble of words being said. They were of course, hitting on her. Can't these guys keep it in their pants? They don't have to jump at a attractive person everytime they see them.

.....

Wait, no. That's not what she meant! Not that Dorothea WASN'T attractive, she was but not in that way. She only meant it in girl to girl way- no that's not right either! Platonic? Yeah, that way. Just a friend that Ingrid acknowledges is pretty in perspective. Doesn't mean she wants to date- this is getting sad... She sounds like how Sylvain did a few years ago when asked how he felt about Felix. Ingrid laughed so hard at how Sylvain responded, that she lost most of her shake she was drinking.

Is this really that bad already? Can you be interested in a person that much after just meeting them? Look at her. She's so... And Ingrid is just... Now she's making herself depressed. 

It doesn't matter if she doesn't do girly things. It doesn't matter that she doesn't care much for shopping. It's fine that she doesn't fix her hair up or wear make up. 

Does Dorothea care about that? It definitely looks like it by now her hair is fixed, makeup bringing out her already captivating eyes. Her clothes showing off her mesmerizing figure.

She's suddenly self-conscious in her white jeans and and matching jacket. It so normal and plain. SHE'S so normal and plain. She stared at the pavement beneath her.

"-grid? Ingrid? There you are! Excuse me everyone." The tapping rhythm on the congregate letting the blonde know she was approaching. "Practice okay?"

She still didn't look to Dorothea, raising her head but looking to the side. "Oh yes.. It was fine. So, where were you wanting to go?"

"Thought we'd go and let you try this one place with me. I've heard good things." Soft pecks on her forehead made her look at Dorothea finally. "Love the outfit. Very cute. White suits you." She winked, causing a small flush to rise in Ingrid's cheeks.

"You compliment me when you're the one with the impressive outfit." Not knowing where to look with Dorothea's blue jeans and leather jacket hugging her just right. "Where's your car?"

"I don't have a 'car' per say." She laughed lightly, "You'll see. Come on." A hand reached down and grabbed hers, and lead her along to the parking lot, paying no mind to the others around now.

Dorothea led her through the lot and stopped at- "A motorcycle?" Ingrid couldn't stop the question coming out. "That's a little... Unexpected." She stood beside Dorothea, watching her make room in her attached compartment. Her hand went to Ingrid, waiting for her to give her her bag. "Will it fit?"

"It should. Your bag might get a little squeezed. You don't have anything important in there that can't have too much pressure on it do you?"

"No, just a change of clothes and little things." 

"Then it will be fine." Ingrid gave it to the burnette and watched her take out an extra helmet and put her bag down in and close the compartment. She caught the helmet when Dorothea tossed it at her. "Safety first Ingy. You ever rode one before?"

"Not a motorcycle. I rode a dirt bike once when my brother got into them for awhile." She explained trying to attach the stap at her chin. It's a little different from the ones she had to wear when riding her horses in shows.

She heard that chuckle that made her insides squeeze. "Here. Let me help Ingrid." She's too close again. She doesn't smell like vanilla today. It's a fruity smell she can't quite point out. It's apple but something else is mixed in. So Dorothea wears perfume? "All done. Wait a bit and i'll put mine on."

Dorothea sat down, looked at Ingrid and pat behind herself on the seat. "Hop on and hold on tight." Ingrid righted herself on the seat. She took a small gulp and softly put her hands around the one in front of her. "You have to hold on tighter than that or you're gonna lose your balance and fall. It's okay. You won't hurt me."

"O-okay.." She tightened just a little, still not leaning on the back of the other. Ingrid was asked if she was ready. "Yeah, i'm ready." 'Just keep like this. Don't lean too close.'

They were ten minutes down the road and Ingrid was now holding tight as she could, face in Dorothea's shoulder. Being this close, she figured out that the smell along with apples was a hint of cinnamon. She is totally a mess. She needs to stop with this. If Dorothea found out that she was actively trying to figure out what she smells like every time Ingrid is with her, she'd be freaked out.

~~~~~~~~

"Here we are." Dorothea's voice in her ear forced her out of her thoughts. She rose her head from Dorothea's back. "You okay? I hope the ride didn't scare you." 

In honesty, it did get her vaguely worked up. To go so fast on something that doesn't have much protection around you and you have no idea what could happen. It is somewhat scary. "No, i'm fine. I mean, I was a little nervous but, i'm fine."

"Good. Let's go eat then." Saying as she was taking her helmet off and fixing her hair. Ingrid nodded and started taking her own off.

~~~~~~~~

"Are you well Felix? You don't seem like yourself today." Felix turned his eyes to the voice. "Is there something I can do?" 

"Nothing is bothering me Ferdinand." He wanted him to leave it at that. But this is Ferdinand and he won't leave it be.

"If you are not feeling well, you should take a break."

"I'm fine, Ferdinand." He got up from leaning on the counter. Maybe if he started cleaning and getting busy, he'd leave Felix alone.

"I have no doubt that you are, however there is something off about you this week. I won't pry but, you should at least take better care of yourself."

"Ugh! Fine. What do you think I should do? What will get you off my back?" He stopped and it almost caused Ferdinand to walk into him.

"Why not just take off Friday next week? We have something else to do anyway. If we take off, we won't have to rush." 

"And what are we gonna say when we ask for the same day at the same time?" He crossed his arms, looking up at Ferdinand unimpressed. "That's going to look suspicious."

"I really don't see how it will. Just ask Ashe when you're alone with him. I'm sure he's noticed it too with your attitude. It is Ashe after all." Still being so optimistic.

"Fine." Ashe probably would make him take a day anyway. "I'll ask. Can you just start working now and leave me alone?"

~~~~~~~~

"Why did you want to start a cafe if you want to make music Dorothea?" Ingrid asked while they sipped on their drinks, waiting for their food.

"That, well, the cafe isn't really for me. It's for Manuela for after she retires from the clinic." She had her body leaning towards Ingrid that was across from her.

"So, you don't want to do that?" 

"Not really. I'm just going to school to be able to open a business so she doesn't have to." She flashed a fond smile, "She's given me so much, I want to give something to her now. I just want to play and make music."

"Have you always felt this way about it?" Is she asking too many questions? 

"No. It was only a little after she adopted me. I used to be so different." She looked out the window, faw away look in her eyes. "I hardly spoke. Barely smiled. I couldn't look people in the eye most days because of what was happening at home.. I felt so ashamed of myself... Of everything..." Her green eyes dulled, living back in the past.

She abruptly closed her eyes and shook her head, smile being placed back on. "But that's over now. I'm happy and i'll never go through that again. I"ll make sure of it." At Ingrid face Dorothea continued, "I hope I didn't get too depressing there. I shouldn't of put so much on you.

"Don't think that. I just can't believe how children can be treated so terribly at their homes." She watched the condensation from her glass trail down, wet stain on the napkin getting larger with each small drop under it. "Home is where you should feel safe and loved. And you two weren't given that. It's abhorrent." She felt the heat in her face, and spreading down in her gut. "It's disgusting that family can do that with no ounce of shame." She spit.

"More common than you might think. You'd be surprised what people go through and we don't even realize." Dorothea's smile wasn't as big as before but it was back and genuine. "I'm glad Sylvain had friends like you to keep him going."

"Y-yeah. I-- me too.." Ingrid wanted to hurl. 

She didn't deserve to be called a friend. 

She didn't help him. 

She was one of the ones who abandoned him. 

She doesn't deserve this praise.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Yuri? I would like to speak with you." Knocking on the bathroom door, waiting for Yuri to give him permission to come in.

The water to the shower stopped and Yuri unlocked the door, towel around his body and droplets running down his body with his hair not being dried. "What's up?" He opened the cabinet with their towels and swiped one to start on his hair.

Ashe lifted himself up on the counter, watching Yuri for a moment. It's almost time for bed. Ashe was already in his late night clothes, taking a shower before the other. "Something odd happened."

"Odd? How?" Yuri asked while drying his hair. He knew what was coming, he just wanted to play clueless for as long as he could.

Ashe stared right at him, waiting to see every tiny reaction. "Felix asked off next week on Friday." Light green eyes honing in when he seen Yuri pause a second before continuing to dry and dress himself. "I already told you that you and Claude can't joke with him like the others on certain things."

"It bothered him. But, I doubt it did that much Ashe." Yuri started to comb through his lavender locks. "He might just have something to do that day. You worry too much."

"No. I don't think so. He's been acting off all week. Spacing out at work, having to be asked a few times to do something, he tripped a few times. He even messed up a few orders." Ashe's voice still calm through the situation.

"Ashe." Yuri quit running through his hair, laughing with his words. "People mess up. They're only human. Accidents happen."

"Not Felix." He answered back quickly, "Accidents DO happen, and he does make some mistakes. But not that much and not this often. Something is wrong." His quiet airy tone shifted and got a little more stern. "I don't like when he gets this way. I know he's off of track and I try to help him but, he won't say anything to me, to anyone."

Yuri had his underwear on and pushed Ashe's legs apart to get closer. "About what happened, I tried to fix it but he took it the wrong way or maybe I said the wrong thing. I'm not too sure. But Ashe, I swear I didn't mean to upset him." His hands started running up and down the others thighs comfortingly. "I can't help to think that what's going on with him this week may be something different than what Claude and I did."

"Well, it might be true what you say. For Felix, it depends. Sometimes he shakes it off and goes on with his day." He trailed off, green eyes sadly glancing away. "Other times, he's upset for days at a time and it's hard for others to be around him with his fluctuating attitude."

Yuri kept his attention on Ashe, pushing his silver bangs behind one of his ears as he was speaking. This kid really sets off Ashe's 'must protect' alarm. Yuri must admit he's... Different at times, yet he's never thought much of it. Most of the people working there are strange to him in some way or another. In fact, Felix seemed so normal at first compared to the rest, Yuri didn't notice him until he'd been there for so long and started noticing his weird habits. It's almost as if he blended in on purpose.

"Ashe." He waited for Ashe to place his hand over his own over his cheek. "Claude and me will fix this. It's our fault he got upset. It's our responsibility to get it right, not yours." Ashe's pouting lips opened only to close when Yuri continued, "Just because you're over everyone on the shift doesn't mean it's up to you to make it right."

They stayed as still as statues, waiting for Ashe to finish what he was thinking. "Felix has been working with us for about a year now. I still barely know anything about him or his home life. I'm sure you don't like that I bring him up so much. But there's something that I seen once and I haven't been able to get it out of my head. Even after I push it out, it just comes flooding back in with no end."

"Are you talking about the places on his back that he had a few weeks ago?" Ashe stiffened up his grip on Yuri's hands, his body tensed, confirming his question. "What do you think is going on?"

"I don't know Yuri... All I know is," Ashe took Yuri's hands in his and slid off the counter, hopeless expression melding into one of determination. He finally locked eyes with Yuri's, "Once I find out who is doing that to him, i'm going to make sure they pay."

Yuri smirked. "There's the Ashe I know. I'm gonna leave it to you. Just ask if you want my help okay?"

Ashe, with a sweet smile moved into his embrace. "Thank you."

~~~~~~~~~~

Damn.

He's so off today. Felix left an opening, leaving Caspar to grapple him. He had time to get out, however, Caspar grabbed the sore part of his shoulders, leading him to flinch and allow the blue haired boy to throw him to the ground.

Caspar got up afterwards, wiping his nonexistent sweat off his brow. His hand was out, offering Felix a hand, Felix stayed in place. Caspar took his hand back, swiped his palm on his shorts and said, "You're sucking pretty hard today."

Felix sat up abruptly, causing his vision to swirl around. His palm found his face, fingers massaging at his temples to make it go away. He found light blue staring him down, unmoving, waiting for his next move. "Again."

"Uhh.. No." Caspar shot him down uncharacteristically.

"Why not?" The one sitting asked grumbling.

"Dude, you've lost five times in the last twenty minutes. Our matches usually last around ten minutes at LEAST. Today you've lost every round under five." Caspar was blunt, almost insulting if it wasn't for the hint of concern in his gaze.

"You're fighting harder, that's why." Felix tried to argue. He NEEDS to do something. If Caspar ends this here, Felix will have to go home and deal with a hungover Rodrigue. He somehow managed to get another day off this week, leaving Felix to spend his day off with Fana... Only to turn back around into the gym when he seen sky blue hair head into the gym later after bidding his mother bye.

Just to avoid going home too early.

"Nuh uh. I might be getting better since we started sparing regularly when you choose to stay here when I come, but i"m not so good that I can kick your ass in three minutes. I don't believe that and you don't either."

"I'm not calling it quits this early. That's a waste of time." Putting more pressure down on the side of his shoulder, trying to ease the pain. He threw his hand over his face, fingers going over his temples firmly,feeling a deep headache coming on.

"I didn't say I wanted to stop here for the day." Felix looked up and over his fingers going across his sight, listening to the other still standing. "Even with you off your game, you're still better than half of the people AND faster than most I fight against in matches."

Felix looked at him, "Then what?"

Caspar put a fist up, laid back once again, smile overtaking his features, "Let's take five or ten. I'll get us something. Eating and drinking some might make you fight better."

Felix couldn't help the crooked smile taking over when Caspar took off to the vending machines, almost trampling over others in the gym and looking them sheepishly to apologize when they hollered or gave dirty looks. How could someone so good at fighting be such an idiot?

~~~~~~~~~~~

"Felix?" Rodrigue tapped on the door with his knuckles.

No answer. He tried again, "Felix." 

Still nothing. 

He tuned the knob and walked into the bathroom, steam fogging up the window and mirrors. The water in his bath hot enough for the room to feel humid and muggy. "Forgive me for interrupting but-" 

He stopped short, looking at his son, head hanging back, eyes closed, hair high up on his head to keep from getting too wet. Both arms through over the side, relaxing. Rodrigue focused on only one thing. Black and blue, just on the verge of turning a nasty mix of green and yellow. Finger shaped bruises all over his shoulders and some bigger ones high on his back.

"He did it again." Felix's body harshly moved to put his father in his sight.

"What are you doing in here? Can't I have privacy?" His hands shot up to his shoulders, covering them.

"Why do you continue to let him do this to you? I told you enough was enough." Rodrigue felt his patience start to leave his body. "I know you and Sylvain have been through something terrible, that doesn't mean he should be allowed to-"

"I already told you what caused this." Felix refused to meet his father's eyes, keeping his down.

"You. Expect me. To think that-that Dimitri did this?" He had to slow his words. He couldn't place what was happening. Dimitri Can't be capable of such injuries. Not to Felix, not to anyone he cares about. "Felix." He became crass, "This is ridiculous. You can't pin all your problems on Dimitri just because you don't want to admit that Sylvain is heading down the same track as-"

"Don't finish that sentence." Felix cut through Rodrigue's words and thoughts like a hot knife.

Rodrigue sighed with his eyes falling behind his lids. "And yet, you have these," He gestured with his hands to his sons body, "all over you."

"THESE aren't from him!" He stood up and began to get ready to leave the room after yanking a towel down. "If you would just listen, you could see that." Throwing the towel over his waist, he jerked the door open.

"Felix. I'm not done speaking with you. Get back here." He reached out, only for his hold to be pulled away from. His son kept walking and turned out the doorway. "Why do you run from things you don't want to hear?" Rodrigue trailed after him, "He's going to really hurt you one day if you don't stop." 

Felix only hunched over, saying nothing. He only started to pick up the pace to put distance between them, the wooden floor creaking in places from their steps. He's almost to his room, just a little more.

A hand is around his wrist, softly gripping him. Rodrigue's desperation stopping him completely. "Felix.. Please.. Just give me a minute to talk to you."

The burning was back in his eyes, only stronger. Without moving he answered, still staring down his door. "We missed that opportunity when you showed me that you preferred me being dead over Glenn." The hand on him tensed without causing pain. He continued, "We missed it when you decided to drink yourself incoherent instead of speaking about our problems." Finally, he moved his head to lock onto haunting familiar blue eyes, "Face it father," He spit out, "The one who doesn't like to hear what he doesn't want to, is you."

The hand around is wrist loosened, allowing Felix to retreat into his room. It didn't lead to a screaming match like he was expecting, but he didn't feel like celebrating.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What is going on I wonder? So many different perspectives and plans and secrets. I honestly don't know how sessions go with therapy but, I tried to get an understanding with what I've heard and read about so I'm sorry if it's not all that accurate. Same if I screw up something super serious in the illnesses. Once again, i'm just going through perspective and with what I have personally went through or with others I know that had similar occurrences.


	12. Some things are about to change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The best way to get better, is to distance yourself from what's hurting you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is early. Reason being I've been quarantined since I caught the you-know-what. It's driving me nuts being cooped up in the house.  
> Now for the good(or no so good) bits. Be warned.  
> -fighting(Dimitri goes a little off the rails)  
> -panic attack  
> -mild dissociation mentioned

The door slamming in his face led Rodrigue to slouch his body in defeat. He wants to knock, to get Felix to talk to him. The words his son spat at him with such hate and disgust, it made his heart tear in the worst way. The bile and acid in his stomach raising up his torso. This feeling.... It's almost the same as the morning Glenn was found, the empty heat in his body that left him cold. Could he be...?

It's time....  
Time to do what he's been putting off for a long time. It's the only way.

"I'm going out.... Just call me if you need me... Okay?" Once again, Felix didn't answer him. After getting his keys and sitting down in his car, he drove off and pondered.

He shut his thoughts out, that won't help having thoughts like this. Felix said that Dimitri is doing that to him...  
But that's impossible....  
Right....?  
If he was, Rodrigue would know, even if he isn't home most nights until late in the morning.   
He drinks sure but...  
He couldn't miss a commotion such as them fighting so bad, no matter how much alcohol took over his body.  
Unless.....

Does Felix not fight back....?

~~~~~~~~~~

"I'm not sure if I should go today Ingrid. Felix isn't too fond of me." They were walking to Rodrigue's house to meet up with Felix. Well, Ingrid was as far as Felix knew. He would be upset at first but, he'd get over it. Hopefully...

"Nonsense. He has to get over this. And once he spends some time with you along with Sylvain, he'll see that he's worried over nothing."

"I don't know if that's going to work. Felix is quite possessive. Just a little chat isn't going to fix that. Even if he gets over the jealousy he has for me, it'll just project onto someone else."

"Huh? Possessive? Felix? I doubt that. Why do you think that?" She would snuggle Ingrid over her confusion if it wasn't for the whole boundaries thing and the seriousness of the situation at hand.

"You didn't notice last weekend?" Dorothea watched Ingrid look up, thumb under her chin and pointer leaning on her slightly red cheek.

"Notice what?" Her cute green eyes focused on the burnette.

"Well, it was covered pretty good so I can see how you didn't."

"What was covered?" Her hand returned to her side.

Dorothea couldn't help the small giggle she produced. "Sylvain had a HUGE hickey on his neck. It was covered with makeup." She paused to take a mental picture of the cute shock pop up on the youngers face. Eyes wide, with the little 'o' of her mouth. Adorable.

"That's what that was!? I-" A horn from a car distracted her. She waved after seeing Rodrigue passed to let him know she seen him. "I thought Sylvain was the one into that stuff." Dorothea laughed from her chest loudly, putting her hand up to cover her mouth. "What's so funny?"

"It's just- I can't- hahaha- give me a moment." She turned away to steady herself. She waited a bit before looking back. "Sylvain is far too much of a sap to put a mark on Felix. Even if Felix wanted it, he most likely wouldn't do it. If he did, it would be a very, very small one. And only to please Felix."

"Sylvain was always so mean to his other dates when we were younger though. I guess Felix would be the exception." Ingrid responded. What a bunch of idiots.Dorothea snorted at her expression being done with the two of them.

"You don't know the half of it. He would do almost anything to make Felix happy when we were younger. He'd probably do whatever Felix asked of him now and then some. For him to be jealous of me, so jealous in fact that he'd make his claim on Sylvain the day he's supposed to see me again, it's hilarious."

"So you're telling me, FELIX gave Sylvain a mark just because you were going to see each other again?" 'Seriously Felix?'

"Hickeys happen to anyone. Sylvain might have or might eventually do it to him if they really get into it but for now? Doubt it.. But that one, wow! That was someone marking what's theirs. He was basically telling me to back off."

Believable. Felix has always been that way. What's his is his. Spoiled by everyone. Rodrigue and Fana said no? Ask Glenn. Glenn said no? Dima. Dima said no? Oh look! Syl got him what he wanted without fail! They tried to get him out of his bratty nature. Sylvain just couldn't say no. EVER. Those eyes were hard to say no to. 

"So he lives here? Nice neighborhood." Dorothea was looking all around.

"Almost. Another mile or so. They have closed off property nearby. Don't be too shocked, they have a lot of land. Their house is simple though."

"After seeing your house, I doubt I would be shocked." She gently weaved her arm through Ingrid's and let Ingrid lead her.

~~~~~~~~~~

The door slammed, the sound bouncing around the room. His heart is racing, his chest about to burst from the pressure he feels. Without moving from leaning on the door with his back, Felix locked the door.

"I'm going out.... Just call me if you need me... Okay?" Footsteps walking away from the door.

The back of his head knocking against the door too hard had pain shooting through and around to the front. His breathing is getting too hard, too fast. Think of something else, anything else...

Think of what Seteth said...  
Push it away. Push the thoughts away.   
Relax your body...  
Feel your entire body...  
Find what's tense.. And push it back..  
Make it vanish.

First, breathing.   
In and out.  
In..and out..  
In.... and out...  
In...... and out.....   
Good.

His fists are too tight... Loosen them..  
Pinky first....  
Ring finger...  
Middle..  
Index.  
Now the thumb.   
Good.

His feet next....   
Felix sat down on his bed that was against the wall.  
He situated himself and planted his feet down on his rug that was way too fluffy. He should throw it away and get a new one. Not because it's dirty or worn, it's still rather intact but, it's for a little kid....

Sylvain always liked laying on it... He can't get rid of it. Not yet...  
His toes running through the dark rug, flexing them all together, the softness helping to ground him.

His body is soaking wet. He should dry off. Not like it matters now, his bed is already wet. He'll just wash them up since the beds need to be done anyway. He's let the bed sheets go two days without washing them. (Absolutely disgusting.) He has to get out of this funk. Just because Sylvain is acting strange, it doesn't mean Felix gets to stop taking care of things. He's the only one in this damn house that keeps it clean. Both his father and Dimitri are so irresponsible, letting the house get so dirty and not maintaining it. He couldn't leave to live with his mother. They would live in a literal pigsty if he did. No consideration for their health at-

He's getting himself distracted again.   
Start over...   
Breathing...  
Fingers....  
Toes....

The smell of lavender and bleach permeates through the room, the smell strong enough to burn which means, his room is still clean. He'll check again after washing the bedspread in the bedrooms but it seems fine for now. Deeper breath in. The clean smell helps his nerves, helps to slow his breathing.

A crash across his room once again distracted him. Felix slammed his fist down on his bed, his fist created an indentation after he picked his hand back up, giving up trying to steady himself if he was going to keep getting interrupted. Irritation rising, shaking in his hands and arms coming back, he rose up and went through his drawers, picking out what to wear for the night. He's meeting up with Ingrid soon anyway.

~~~~~~~~

He broke it...  
He broke it but how?..

Dimitri stood in front of the broken glass that he had his drink in. The small pieces all over the carpet, along with the liquid soaking through and creating a stain. Was his grip too hard? He didn't believe so, but it was hard to say with seeing the state that it's in now.

He shouldn't stand around. He has to pick up and clean up this mess. He moved a small trash can near the mess. Reaching down after crouching, he held one hand palm up to hold the pieces. They're so small, his fingers might not be able to get a good hold on them.. Just move slow so they don't cut.

He almost had half of the pieces up before his door opened. He dropped them when Felix startled him by speaking. "Hey? I just wanted to ask if you wanted to- What happened?" He looked and followed Felix as he walked around and knelt down next to Dimitri. "You're supposed to wear gloves you know?" He said as he started to pick up the pieces without them on himself.

He went to respond to Felix but.... "Your hair has got so long... I've never noticed it before. You don't wear it down much. It's quite striking." Without thinking, he reached up and picked up a strand, running black between his fingers softly. It was damp in some places. So Felix didn't wash it tonight then. Felix seemed to get disturbed by his touch, Dimitri released his hair. "Forgive me... I didn't mean to touch without permission."

Felix side eyed him. "Whatever. Just don't do it without asking next time. Also, keep me out of your mouth if you're going to compare my hair- no, ANYTHING about me to Glenn." Such ferocity. Did he upset Felix with his hair comment that bad? "You look stupid." Reacting to his confused face. "Claude really pissed me off with what you said to him."

That? That was- well if Dimitri told him that talking about him and Glenn was the only way to get rid of his nerves when Claude asked about his life, he might not take it too well. "I'm sorry Felix. I didn't mean for him to bring it up to you, honest." He reached down quickly to aid Felix in picking up the glass again. "If I would've known, I wouldn't have told him."

"You even told him about Sylvain. Are you serious?" Felix almost sounded like he wasn't talking to Dimitri anymore but to himself. Felix was starting to go faster with picking up the glass.

"If it helps any, I only mentioned his name in passing. I didn't say that you two were dating or-"

"Does it matter if you told him? Claude is smart enough to put the pieces together idiot." The blonde flinched. "He's too curious for his own good. I don't need everyone knowing everything about me." 

Claude is a curious person. He's not a bad guy though. In fact, Dimitri believes that Sylvain would get along great with him. However... With his past, Claude might press him for details and Sylvain.... Dimitri acknowledges that he's very naive and not good at reading people but, he wasn't stupid enough not to see that Sylvain was rather defensive to him regarding Felix the day Dimitri went. He played it off as a joke and the younger only went with it.

He can only wonder why Sylvain acted that way. Is it because Dimitri knew that he was rough with Felix and that Rodrigue didn't agree with their relationship because of it? He didn't understand why but if that's what they liked and Felix was okay with it, he wouldn't pry. As long as they knew there was boundaries and not to cross them.

That couldn't be it. Ingrid knew as well yet, Sylvain and her had hit it off again no problem. Maybe he should ask Ingrid if she could help with what he should do. To reconcile their friendship. Dimitri isn't all that great with things like this. He'll get with her one day this weekend if she doesn't have plans already. 

Getting back to what Felix said. "Why does it matter if people know things about you? That's the whole point of family and friends. People who know everything about you, yet love you regardless."

He watched the others face scrunch up and answer back, "That might be what you think but I prefer not having everything about me being known. Family and friends can love you without knowing all that you are."

"That's-" Dimitri didn't know what to say. His blonde bangs falling in front of his sight. Could everyone still care with knowing what he's done? Perhaps not.. Or is it how Felix says. A sigh broke him away from his insulting thoughts.

"Look, as long as you have someone to talk to about what you need to get the weight off your shoulders, it doesn't matter if you tell anyone else. As long as you get it out." Amber eyes were now looking at him, voice annoyed and turning more understanding as he continued.

The words Felix is saying is making him queasy. Does he know about the nightmares? He has been a bit more nice to him than normal. "Are you that person?" His voice came out rougher than what he wanted. He kept going, regardless of the little way that Felix's shoulders tightened. "The person I can tell all my problems to?" He stood up, head now laying in his palm. He began to chuckle, becoming harsh and deep. "As if problems could go away that easily. You have let Sylvain get to you."

Felix glared at him. "The hell does that mean?" His glare getting more fierce by each second of silence. Both have forgot about the drink soaking into the floor.

"Sylvain has always ran from his problems. Causing as much trouble as he could to ignore his issues, not caring about who else he hurt in the process. Yes, he was young but, you can't say that he is excused." His hands now in fists at his side.

"He's trying to get better and fix it. He's not running from his problems, he's trying to put it behind him." Felix stood up. Not helping Dimitri still looking down on him but reducing the distance. "Holding onto the bad things will only hurt more. You should live up to his example and let it go." Starting to lose patience.

"You think it's that easy?" Blue eyes locking down on the other. "It may be easy for you to say that but you think that I could just forget what i've been through? What I have seen?"

"Glenn was important to me too! You have no right to say you've been through worse! Everyone suffered from that. How dare you!" Felix's whole body began to shiver, unnoticed by Dimitri.

"Oh yes! We all hurt from it. But poor Felix had to suffer too." Felix went still.

'Stop.'

"After all, it's not like he never got what he wanted or was spoiled."

'Stop it.'

"Other than losing Glenn, what have you lost?" Felix's glare lessened, now only starting at him with curious apprehension. "You act as if Rodrigue is the worst father ever because he drinks and you take some things he says out of contex, without even thinking about that he lost his son or how I no longer have my father!" Felix leaned back, still keeping his eyes on him.

'Stop it, Dimitri.'

"You don't think of how Sylvain put away his problems mostly because he had to help you and your little ones. Like, how you would cry when Glenn couldn't spend every waking moment with you or how I didn't want to play all the time after I moved in." He finally broke his eyes away from dull blue. Looking down and to the side, taking a step back.

'That's not true.'

"You act as if you're the one keeping everything together, yet you're the one that's actually making things worse. You really aren't that special and you're not some god send that's just going to magically make everything better." Felix kept taking more steps back, Dimitri only following him.

'You don't understand. That's not it.'

"I understand perfectly. You still think you never did anything wrong. Well, allow me to shine some light on the situation Felix." Felix hit the door, hand looking for the knob on the door. "You are the one who got out easy." Rattling metal and deep fast breathing filled his ears. Despite his anger, he's calm. Eerily so.

'Is that what you think? That's not-'

"Shut up!" His left hand slammed down next to the side of a pale face. The shaking metal pissing him off. He yanked the hand on the door off and roughly pinned it down next to it. "The only thing that happened to you was getting a little roughed up and shown a bit of the real world."

'Please stop.'

"So he hit you. How is that any different from us fighting as kids? We got out of control. Is that any reason for him losing his life over?"

'I can't bre-'

"And what's worse..." his fury left, just empty and without emotion. "With each year, you look more and more like Glenn that it disgusts me to even think you are anything like him. You let every little thing get to you. It's quite child-"

"You're wrong!"

He was shoved hard enough to lose his footing and fall back. He stared at his dark floor before following the sound of quick, wheezy breathing. Felix was leaning over, one hand wrapped around his midsection with the other over his mouth, his face paler than his normal, natural pale complexion. He wouldn't look at Dimitri. His inhales as shaky as his body. Chest moving rapidly in and out.

"You... are... a- an... animal..." Felax taking a deeper, slower breath with each word. Hate and disdain flowing from him. "A... wild... beast... Just waiting.... to strike." Amber orbs locking onto his. "Right now... Looking at you... You make me want to retch."

At Felix's posture and words, Dimitri was brought back to himself. "Oh god, Felix." He started to panic. "What have I done? Are you okay?" He quickly made himself get up to help Felix, only for the other to knock his hands away. "I didn't mean anything that I-"

"Shut up!" Felix answered, breath still shallow. "You made your opinion known. I- all i've been doing is trying to keep you two afloat. I thought if you two knew there was someone here for you... That you would get better, get the help you need." He used the door to straighten himself a little. "I can see that you see differently. With the way you feel and with how you said father felt.... maybe it IS best for me to leave." 

"No. Felix, please. I..." Ice blue eyes locked onto the defensive, weak stance. It led him to be speechless. "I really don't feel that way. Neither does Rodrigue. I just-I only..." He couldn't get what he wanted to say out.

"You've said plenty. I'm leaving." Felix opened the door, face facing the other teen, untrusting of him. 

"Wait! Felix! I-" The door shut behind Felix, cutting Dimitri off from apologizing. He screwed up big this time. How will he ever fix this. How could he say such things?

~~~~~~~~~~

"Wow! This is a lot of land. I thought your family was all for security but this... A huge gate, big fence surrounding the entire area, you think it might be a bit much?" 

"Rodrigue is a well known captain of the force. There is plenty of people who like him but well, there's a lot of people who dislike him too. He has to protect himself and his family." Ingrid explained.

"Ah! Right! A bunch of criminals no doubt. I gotcha." Dorothea winked in understanding.

"Umm. Not exactly.." She denied, putting her hands together and moving them around uncomfortably. "Sure. A lot of felons dislike him for being the one who arrested them and brought them to justice. It's just..." Her emerald eyes looked away.

"Just what?"

"It's not Rodrigue himself that's the reason." Ingrid shocked the burnette with how fast her confidence came back and she asked boldly, "How well do you know Glenn Fraldarius?"

"I know he put a crap ton of underground people in jail along with the team he led. So many people STILL praise him for being able to find out information on those who have never been caught before. It was quite shocking to be honest! I don't know anything personal about the guy."

"That's mostly why. Glenn upset the people he shouldn't have. You mess with the underground, you put not just yourself, but people important to you in danger too. That's what all THIS" she gestured around them, "is."

"I see. Could that also be why he, umm..." Dorothea trailed off.

"........ I don't know... Glenn wasn't one on sharing his life or his problems." Ingrid lowered her eyes, no longer matching the others green eyes. "But, that was a bit of everyone's fault. We believed he was unstoppable, unbeatable, unmovable. We put so much on him that I wouldn't doubt that he did it over being so pressured to be perfect. I just wish I could change it. If only I could go back and tell him that he didn't need to be so strong all the time."

"Ingrid..."

~~~~~~~~~~

The doorbell broke him out of his self pity. Traveling through the long dark house he only hoped that Felix was back and just forgot his keys. Why did he hurt him when clearly Felix only tried to help. He walked up to the door and looked through the peephole. Ingrid and.... Who is that? She looks familiar for some reason. He turned the knob and opened.

"Ingrid. What are you doing here?" He stood mostly behind the door, to hide his appearance.

"We're here to meet up with Felix. I was going to walk with him today to the clinic to see Sylvain along with Dorothea. He was going to ask you if you wanted to come too. Did he not?"

Come to think of it, Felix was asking him something when he first came into the room but trailed off when he noticed Dimitri cleaning. "He- he already left, i'm afraid." He choked out. "You missed him by about twenty minutes or so." 

"No way! He promised he would wait. That!- UGH! I'm gonna get him later." Ingrid staked off to the kitchen.

"Um..." Dimitri fiddled with his fingers before shyly welcoming Dorothea inside. "My name is Dimitri. It's a pleasure." He put his hand out and the girl reached and took his to shake.

"Dorothea. Likewise." 

They followed Ingrid to see her chugging a beverage from the fridge. "You should really offer something to Dorothea first don't you think?"

"Ahhh... I was parched..." She blushed when she noticed the two. "I'm sorry Thea. Would you like something?"

"I'm fine but thank you. So Felix took off without us huh? Makes sense I suppose." She leaned back on one of the counters.

"That would be my fault. We had a bit of a spat earlier. He stormed out after."

Ingrid rose a brow. "A spat? What happened? That usually doesn't cause him leaving like that."

Dimitri only let his face fall more. "I went too far this time. The way he looked at me... I can only imagine how much I hurt him."

The girls shared equally as confused expressions before settling to find out what happened. Ingrid spoke, "What happened?"

~~~~~~~~~

"I'm telling you Bernadetta, Ingrid said she loved it. She couldn't put it down. Felix let me know. I'm honestly surprised you let her borrow it." Sylvain was fully spread out on his couch, relaxing while talking to the purple haired girl.

"She suddenly asked me earlier this week. I felt like maybe it would be a good thing. Not like you're bad or anything, I just feel you're a bit biased from being my friend and you know how nervous I get when people offer criticism and Ican'thandlesuchexpectations-"

"Hey. Bernie. Slow down. It's okay."

A long inhale and exhale, "Right. Ingrid will be nice about it. Bernie is sorry. I'm just nervous about the con coming up. Alois said it would be a good place for me to show my book off and I still haven't decided if I should or not."

"No reason to apologize. It's all good. It's your decision and whatever you pick i'm sure he'll support you on it. Speaking of, how is the cosplay outfits coming along?"

"It's actually going pretty good. I have all the stuff ready and i'm already done with Annette's and Lysithia's. Felix's is almost done too." She sounded excited now. Great! As long as she isn't freaking out.

"Awesome. Can't wait to hear what you picked for-" A knock. Mercedes slide her face partly through the door and smiled apologetically. "Just a sec Bernadetta, it's Mercedes." She acknowledged him before he spoke to the doctor. "What's up?"

She seemed confused although she tried to stay peppy. "You have a visitor. They wish to speak with you if you're okay with it."

"Uh, sure, I don't mind." It's not his father again is it?

"You may see him. However, if you cause a commotion, you will be asked to leave, understand?"

"Yes. I understand completely. Thank you." 

That voice! What's he doing here? Rodrigue awkwardly slid through the small opening of the door and stared at the red headed for a few beats. "Hello Sylvain... How have you been?" He was fidgeting with his clothes.

"Sylvain? Are you okay?" Bernadetta was still on the line.

"Oh! I-I'm fine. I'll h-have to call you back later o-okay?" He answered the girl while still fixed on the man.

"Sure thing. No problem. I'll see you tomorrow yeah?" She hung up without waiting for his answer. He put the phone back on the hook and rose to his feet, face blank.

"Look at you. You have gotten taller. You sprout up out of nowhere. You're taller than me now." Rodrigue said nicely, not moving any closer. Sylvain still didn't speak. He did however let his emotion fall and he looked conflicted and questioning. "I apologize. It's been awhile since I came to see you."

Sylvain walked to place the bed between the two, honey eyes scaling the older man. "I can see me being here is making you uncomfortable but, I have no one else to ask about this except you. Even then, if you don't tell me, I couldn't fault you." Sylvain tightened his face and stayed silent ever still. Rodrigue has to keep going. He came this far. "I only wish to ask a few things, then i'll be on my way."

Sylvain finally spoke, "Why are you here?"   
Thank god! He was afraid Sylvain wouldn't speak to him. So he's not a complete wall just yet. He has a chance.

"You see, Felix is troubled. I don't know how to help him. I was hoping you could help me."

Sylvain stayed where he was, arms folding over his torso. "That depends on what you ask. Just know, he would tell you things if you'd stop your senseless drinking and verbal abuse."

The mans blue eyes flinched from the harsh lip lash. It seems both of them have rubbed off on each other quite a bit. "I know. I've messed up terribly. That's why i've come to ask you what I could do."

"Surely he's told you what needs to happen." The teen let his hip fall to one side. He turned his head away from Rodrigue.

"I can't go to public quitter meetings. That would ruin my reputation. If i'm fired, I couldn't take care of Dimitri and Felix."

Take a deep breath Sylvain. Don't let your emotions get the better of you. "So your rep is more important than patching up your relationship?" It came out unpleasant. Sylvain would take it. Better than straight up cussing the guy.

"No. Of course not. I want to have what I used to with my son. If that's what it takes, i'll take a break from work and go to the meetings and therapy. Is that the only way?"

"That's what he told you yeah? So do it. Don't ask me." He said sharply.

"Please, Sylvain. Help me. I-I can't- I can't lose the only son I have left."

Sylvain snapped his head back to the older man, desperation being what he would describe with the way the father sounded. He almost broke with the look Rodrigue gave him. "Even if I tell you, how do I know you'll do it? You won't like what I have to say. My opinion is different from his on what will be better. But... At this point, this is the only thing that could help all of you."

"Tell me. I beg you." He fell to his knees, "I have no other options." There was tapping on the floor getting louder with each tap. There was a hand on his shoulder once they stopped.

"Get up. You might want to sit somewhere more comfortable with what i'm about to say, Rodrigue." Sylvain offered his hand and the older took it. "But first, I have to tell you what's going on."

~~~~~~~~

"Sorry Lysithia. I didn't mean to-"

"Nonsense. Don't say you're sorry. Not for this." Lysithia walked through the archway from the kitchen with the tea she made. Sitting down on the recliner next to the couch he was sitting on to give him space. She slid the tea on the table to him. "I'm not the best i'm afraid, but I hope it will suffice."

"It's fine. Thank you." He drank the tea, jumping when it burned his tongue. He didn't wait for it to cool. He sat it back on the table. He wanted to run. Lysithia sitting with her fists tight on her lap and her face scrunched made him know she wasn't going to let him go this time without telling her what happened.

She looked up from her lap when her expression cooled to one of worry, "This was the worst i've seen you."

"What are you-" 

She didn't get angry at his act of cluelessness, she only became more somber. "That's enough. Don't push me away this time. Whatever happened, it almost broke you. It's almost like you came here out of instinct. When you got here, you didn't speak. Just went straight to my room and balled up like I wasn't even here. You wouldn't respond to me either."

"I didn't mean to ignore you." His voice was weak and hoarse.

"It's not that." She shook her head. "More like you were in another world. I-I was terrified Felix when you didn't respond to anything. So much so, I almost looked up Seteth's number so he could come get you."

"I wouldn't have went with him."

She slumped over, "I know. Which is why I didn't." After all, Seteth would have taken him to the clinic. And that means, there would have been a chance that Sylvain would see him. Sylvain knows now however. It's only a matter of time until he brings it up to Felix. He's going to be so mad at her for telling him.

"I keep making you go through with this when I shouldn't." He's still talking so low and otherworldly.

"There is a way to fix it, you know. I get that you want to 'fix' everything before you focus on your therapy" She quoted with her hands, "But at this point, you need to take getting better more seriously. I really don't think you understand how serious these reactions of yours are."

"If I come here during them, what's the harm?" He started to sound more sure.

"You subconsciously come here. That's fine. But, what if in the future you go somewhere that'll put you in trouble. And that could be a bad place for your mind once you come back."

"You think I would willingly go back to that place unconsciously?" He scoffed.

She shook her head again. "Not in your right mind you wouldn't. Look, all i'm saying is, that it's worked for you so far coming here but what if next time you end up somewhere unfamiliar or where it will only damage you further?"

"If I do that, i'll be fine. Not many people bother me."

She narrowed her pink eyes, "That's not what i'm saying!" He jumped at her outburst. Her eyes widened at her loss of control before lowering her eyes in apology. "I KNOW you can fight. But you have to realize, when you're in that state you won't have full control. Almost anyone could overpower you if they know what to say or do. You'd be-" Lysithia stopped, hoping he would understand.

He swallowed, "I'd be helpless. Unable to fight back or I wouldn't be able to fight back properly."

She didn't respond, only turning away.

"I'll bring it up next time in my next meeting." He assured her. He was uncomfortable with the fact he'd have to. There's no other way. She was right. He can't let this keep happening. But.... What can he do? Once he tells Seteth what's going on, he'll most likely be forced to move in with his mother. He loves her and he knows he'd do better with her. 

But he'd have to quit work. She lives close enough for him to stay in his current school yes, but not close enough for him to do anything other that go home after. He doesn't have that luxury. He still has things he needs to do. He could pull them off if he really wanted to. He just won't see Sylvain every weekend since he would have to push some of the errands into them.

That can't happen just yet. "-ey. Hey. Hey! You going to answer that? Or you gonna just let it ring?" What? His phone is ringing. He checked the caller and answered. What could she want.

"Finally!! I was afraid you wouldn't answer!"

"Bernadetta what-"

"Trouble. Trouble trouble, big trouble!" She was speaking so fast, he barely got anything she was saying.

"Slow down. If not, say words and names that have you worked up and i'll try to sum it up."

Shaky inhale, then, "Phone, talking, Sylvain." Okay that's easy to guess. "Mercedes. Visitor." 

Amber eyes began to panic. "Did Margrave go back already?"

"No! Not Margrave! It was- it was Rodrigue! Rodrigue is there!" She hung up soon after. He didn't know if it was an accident or not.

"Oh no..." Felix got up hurriedly. "That's bad. Real bad. Lysithia, I have to leave now." He paced to the door, Lysithia hot on his heels, asking him what's wrong. "Call Bernadetta. Calm her down. Make sure she's okay."

"Okay.... but what about you?" She asked at the doorway to her house, Felix already halfway down the steps to her porch.

"I'll be fine. I have a reason to be in control right now." He never stopped to turn around, jumping the last two and took off running.

"This is crazy. I'm sending a text to Ingrid." Like hell she's going to let him be alone. She called up Bernadetta and made sure to send a quick text to the blonde while she was calming the other down.

~~~~~~~~

"Dimitri... Why-why would you say those things?" Dorothea spouted out, unable to stop herself. She doesn't know him. She shouldn't say anything. The things he said was uncalled for, that's why. 

"I lost control. I honestly don't know what came over me." He was seated at the table with the other two leaned on the counters.

Ingrid was remaining awfully quiet. She hadn't said anything the whole time. Which could be why Dorothea lost her patience. "And with how you explained his reaction, you just LET him leave? What the hell?"

"He was angry. I didn't want to upset him further." The boy looked genuine. 

Dorothea normally wouldn't behave this way but, for someone to be this-

"Stupid..."

Ingrid faced her and the blonde, blue eyed boy stopped fidgeting. "What?" He asked confused.

"Are you that stupid? You seriously thought-" She put a hand on her chest and- no. Screw it. She's not letting him off. She dropped her hand and clenched her fists. "He was having an attack you idiot! How could you confuse him being angry!? Are you kidding!? And you just let him walk right out the door in the middle of one!?"

"An attack? I don't-" His confusion only made her more angry.

"You don't even know? Seriously? I can't believe this. Do you know where he went? At least tell me you know where." His saddened eyes told her everything. "Do you even know him at all?" He looked at her in shock. She sighed deeply. "We're wasting time here. If you don't know, we have to move Ingrid."

"Why? What could happen?" She followed Dorothea when she began walking to the exit. "Is this bad?"

"If we can't find him, it could be. He might end up somewhere dangerous if we don't know where to go. Where does he usually go when he's stressed or upset?"

"Well, I would say that he's at Edelgard and Lysithia's. They live in the appartment complex a few miles from here." At hearing Ingrid, Dorothea pulled out her phone to call a taxi.

"We need to make sure he's there."

~~~~~~

They waited a few minutes and when the driver arrived, they wasted no time. When they were a few minutes away, Ingrid's phone vibrated. She took it out of her back pocket, phone charm that Dorothea got her dancing around and sparkling in the evening sun shining through the window.

She read the message over a couple times in confusion before slamming her hand on the seat and leaning forward in a rush. "I'm sorry! But I need to change the destination please!"

~~~~~~~

"You better have a good reason for bringing me here Rodrigue. I had to leave in the middle of a meeting with a client. I don't care if you don't approve of their relationship. You need to understand, Felix may be a teenager but-"

"That's not the reason he's here. I would like for you to hear me out please."

The woman in black slacks and long sleeved button up turned and looked up to the red head teen that towered over her, long hair swaying across her back in her ponytail. Her scowl swapped to a tired, soft smile, her arms falling from being crossed. "Hello Sylvain. I hope he's not bothering you with his ridiculousness. You can just have him thrown out. The man is probably drunk again." She spat out looking back to her "husband". Bothering this child again, what an imbecile. Doesn't he have anything better to do?

"Actually. We have to tell you about something." Sylvain couldn't help but smile at her even in this situation that could lead to big changes. She was so small, smaller than Felix even. She was one of the strongest people in his life. But she wasn't afraid to let her guard down around the people she loved. If Sylvain could just get their cooperation, then, this would work out.

The lines under her eyes softened more with Sylvain's open smile. "I'm listening. What is this plan you thought up? I'm all ears." She side eyes the workers nearby. "What if I get permission for you to go out with us? That way, we can have some actual decent food. I'm fucking starving."

Sylvain chuckled at her.

~~~~~~~~

Felix almost hit the door to the clinic. Sweat was rolling down his face from the run. Sliding the card through, and running in to find Sylvain. He ran all the way to his room. After doing the same with the compartment to the door, he fell to the floor when he entered. "Sylvain! Are you here?" At no answer, his eyes opened to a dark room. No one in sight.

He rose to his feet and started running and looking through everywhere Sylvain was allowed in the building. Unable to find him, he knocked on the office door that he knew Mercedes was. At her chiming voice to come in, he rushed through. "Where's Sylvain?"

She was shocked by his appearance. She became concerned and completely forgot his question. "Are you alright? You look terrible."

"No time for that. Where is he? My old man came by here. I know he did so don't lie to me." He glared at her.

"Well, Sylvain has permission to go out to eat. I believe they were going to go eat at my husband's restaurant. Not the one you work at. The other one." He didn't wait. As soon as she said Dedue's, he ran back out. "Please wait! Let me give you a ride there! You shouldn't be out by yourself. It's going to get dark soon! I'll let Marianne know." She picked up her keys and followed him. 

~~~~~~~

"Here we are. That'll be-" the driver had money shoved in his face.

"Thank you. Sorry for the trouble!" Ingrid gave him extra for the extra drive and trailed behind the older girl.

"Excuse me? Where is Felix?" Dorothea asked at the desk with the two workers at the computers.

The workers looked at each other in knowing. The male stood up. "Come with me. I'll tell you what's going on. You're Ingrid right?" The green haired man asked. She nodded more than necessary. "Let's go somewhere more private. Things are about to get quite messy." Ingrid didn't like the sound of that.

~~~~~~~

"So that's what has been going on?" The woman asked Sylvain and Rodrigue. Dedue cleared a small room out for them for privacy, letting them speaking freely without worry. "I knew this would happen." She hissed. "I knew you weren't fit to watch him! But I gave you the benefit of the doubt and allowed Felix to stay when he said you were getting better." Her hand placed on her head. "I blame myself. I was so stupid!"

"Fana, I-"

"Shhh!" Her other hand raised in front of him. "I'm thinking about how to do this. You won't be of any help, so be quiet! You've done enough." Rodrigue was seconds away from breaking down. Sylvain couldn't help but feel sorry for the guy. Even if he was upset with him too. Fana hardy let him speak the whole time they've been there. She knows how and where to cut deep. He expected no less from a lawyer.

"Hey, Fana?" Her glare lessened when she met with her amber eyes to his.

"Yes?" He needs to tread carefully. Just one wrong gesture or word and Rodrigue was going to get the whip.

"I think it would be best if-"

~~~~~~~

"-he goes to live with his mother, Fana Fraldarius." Linhardt finished.

Ingrid's mind stopped. That.... Can't be right. Sylvain wants them to spend time apart? That's- "No."

"Excuse me?" Linhardt asked from her sudden refusal. Dorothea decided to wait outside for privacy.

"That can't be right. Sylvain doesn't want to be away from him. You're fibbing."

"He doesn't want to be away from him, but he knows that that will be the best way for Felix to recover."

She leaned back in her chair, crossed her legs and arms in defiance. "I don't care. Since when is he trying to be the responsible one in our group?"

The nurse fixed her with a serious stare, "Since he found out that Felix is in a very bad environment and it's only going to get worse if nothing is done." Her deviance left completely, becoming more sad as the seconds passed. 

It's true. Letting him stay with Rodrigue, to let him stay near Dimitri after hearing what happened... It's asking for an accident to occur. As much as she'd like to believe it, even though she loves them all so much...  
This has nothing to do with her. She can only watch and hope it works out and that one day, they can all be together again like they used to.

"I... I understand." She sniffled.

~~~~~~~~

"Felix. We should wait until they're done-" He got out and started for the restaurant. She could only do what she was able and followed. This isn't going to end well. "Oh dear." 

~~~~~~~~

"I see. So that's why. I'll give him one-" Fana paused when the noise on the other side of the door got louder.

"Let me through."

"I'm afraid it's best if you wait."

"Let me through. Now." 

She couldn't help but smirk. "Seems he's here sooner than I thought." She started to roll up her sleeves. "Hope you guys are ready for a brawl. He's not going to agree."

"I know." Sylvain answered. "But this is the best way."

The door was opened and Felix stomped in. "Dammit old man! Why are you-" He stopped when he seen his mother standing up confidently. Hip cocked and flipping her hair back, her bangs being held back with a pin. "What are you doing back? I thought you had a meeting today?"

"I do. However, I found out something that pissed me off,so now, i'm here. You want to tell me anything before I start?" She dared him to fuss with her scowl.

"No." He figures it's best to hear her out. Whatever is going on, it's only going to piss her off more if Felix gets combative.

"Sit." She gestured to the table. "We're going to have a talk and you're going to cooperate."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hoping to maybe get another chapter out while I'm out of work but I'm not too sure. The no taste or smell is depressing and the headache has made me sensitive to light and sound. It sucks. I hope you guys are doing alright though. It's not terrible but I wouldn't want anyone to catch it do be careful out there everyone.


	14. Next week

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix talks. Bernie and Sylvain prepare and she recalls some memories. Dorothea and Ingrid visit. Felix gets ready for the move. Sylvain worries some more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly thought I had put this up a few days ago. I'm so sorry.   
> I am now officially covid free! (After 3 tests spanning a month and a half)  
> Stil don't have my smell or taste back yet unfortunately:(  
> I'm now back to work as well and finally on day shift permanently!

"After next week, you're going to be moving in with me. Of course, until then you'll be staying with a friend or i'll get a room for you somewhere else. The quicker you get out of that house the better." His mother's words echoed through his skull. Falling further into the dark pit with each word from her. "I'll be coming with you tonight so you can pack some clothes, then tomorrow, you'll pack up everything else you need."

"I agree. I have to stop drinking. You and Dimitri both will be going somewhere else. I just haven't decided with him yet."

Felix didn't respond.   
How could he? They just decided within the last few hours that they were going to move him and Dimitri around? Just up and move them without asking them their opinion?  
Why? This didn't make any sense, unless.... he looked at the three around him. Fana in front of him, watching every move he made across the table, keeping a fair distance away from Rodrigue next to her. His hands clasped on the table of auburn red wood, unease overcoming him at each moment of silence that passed.

Lastly, the body next to him, arm behind Felix on the seat. Steady, clear eyes looking down on him, saddened at Felix's reaction at the sudden decision. His expression might have convinced Felix that he had nothing to do with this, except for the smidge of the hidden guilt that the younger caught in the edge of his gaze. 

Knowing that he would choke on tears if he continued to keep eye contact with the one beside him.  
He jerked his head away from his boyfriend, feeling betrayed and facing the dark tile on the floor so much different from the light ones at Dedue's other restaurant the teen worked at frequently. 

Light carmel lines trailing through the chocolate brown tiles. Expensive dark cherry wood chairs they were sitting in not helping the creeping dread flowing through his veins. He hates being here. He wants to go to the clinic with Sylvain and sit his back to the others chest. To lean back and listen to the comforting beats of his heart.

"Felix.. I know this is going to be hard. But the harder we work, the faster we get everything together, the better off we'll all be and it'll work out." Fana's strong voice cutting through the silence that dragged on. Her eyes dimmed with sympathy. "I really did want you to choose where you would live, however, I can't let this continue. Not like this." Her fingers entwined and she rested her head on them. "There will be no compromises this time. You will do as I say from now on. And you will take your therapy seriously this time. None of this going once a month. You will be going every week like you're supposed to." Her eyes hardened slightly, "Am I clear?"

"Yes..." His voice was soft and fleeting. 

"Answer me correctly. Look at me and speak clearly." Her soft face was conflicted. She didn't want to push him this hard. This needed to be done however. Her son had to understand how serious this was. 

"Fana. Don't push him for-"

"Shh!" Her hand rose to cut Rodrigue off without taking her matching set of eyes away from her child. She gave Felix his time to speak. If they had to sit here all night and the rest of the morning, they will. This madness needs to stop. Rodrigue didn't realize how damaging this could be to these kids if they didn't get help.

Sylvain went to comfort the one next to him, hand on the seat rubbing up and down Felix's arm and shoulder. He wasn't shoved away but, the unresponsive nature still made him uneasy.

Felix eventually moved.  
Head rising from staring at the floor. Eyes focusing on Fana. His glassy eyes not hiding his true feelings, along with the tight expression on his face. "I understand. I'll pack up tomorrow and i'll let my job know ahead of time. And i"ll-" a small quivering gasp gave away how much he was holding back, "Move in with you and focus more on improving and my recovery."

Both Rodrigue and Fana let their bodies relax. One reason for Felix's acceptance (although reluctantly) and two, for him not trying to fight the outcome. Sylvain wishes he could do the same.

He couldn't. His leg on the the floor was restless, bouncing the other that crossed over it. His insides running hot and cold all for Felix being as distant as he was. Now that he's seeing the response in his lover, he doesn't know if he truly made the right call. This is the safest option for sure. But this reaction (or lack of one) is concerning. Does his parents really not think there's something wrong?

He wants the best for Felix.   
And right now, this is all he can do. If the younger hates him after this and wants to end everything for Sylvain shoving him in a situation he never wanted to be in, then he'd accept it. He truly doesn't want that outcome. But he would do it... If Felix wanted to cut ties with him, he'd obey his wishes. 

For now, all he can do is be here and comfort him the best way he can. Whatever it took, he'd do it.

"I'm glad you're going along with us. Thank you. I'm sorry it had to come to this.. Rodrigue," Her husband turned at her, "You're free to go. Felix and I will be there later." His blue eyes glanced back to Sylvain. She answered before he could speak, "I'll get him back myself as well. Go check on Mitya. I checked on him by text a while ago and he said he was fine. He shouldn't be alone much longer."

He stood up with her and stared for a few precious moments before he reached out to her. His fingers grazing her cheek softly. "I'm so sorry Fana...." Allowing him to do so, eyes sparkling with painful affection. Leaning into his touch for a fraction, and then started to pull away. He tried to frame her face with his palm. She smacked it away rudely, back to her stoney expression.

She put her back to him, not letting anyone see her face. "You should go now. I'll let you know more once everything is settled." Placing a hand on her hip that started to lean.

"Yes." He coughed to clear his throat. "Of course." He put his eyes back on the boys and bowed. "I wish you the best. I hope I see you both soon. Goodnight you three." Felix was still transfixed to the floor and Sylvain gave a quick nod before turning back to Felix. The door closing to show Rodrigue had left.

Minutes passed by with no one moving. Almost frozen in time.  
Fana raised a fist to her mouth, clearing her throat as well, then turned. "Sylvain. Felix. I'll wait for you in the other room." She spoke to the red head with her eyes, looking at him pleadingly and moved her sight to her son before putting eyes back onto Sylvain. He acknowledged her with stiff nod. They were now alone.

He completely faced Felix, pulling him carefully for his torso to face him. Both hands now travelling each of the others arms up and down in long, careful strokes. "Felix?"   
Black fringes framed the face that refused to meet his, eyesight still facing down. "Please look at me."

His words only making ebony hair cover his face with his head falling more with the shake of his head.

"I- I'm sorry that I did this without telling you. I just-" His hands stopped right on strong shoulders, keeping them there. "I can't let you do this to yourself anymore."   
Nothing.   
"If you don't want to look at me, at least say something. Please?"

"-do you mean?"

"What?" He leaned in more.

"By THIS, what do you mean by THIS?" Keeping his tone calm.

"Living in a house with an alcoholic parent who puts you down, ignoring what your therapist says and also being around a person who thinks it's fine to physically hurt you whenever he pleases."

He didn't miss the widening eyes and the very slight turn in his direction. "How did you find out about that? Who told- Lysithia.... I can't believe this." Another betrayal from someone he thought he could trust. "Whatever she said, it's not as-"

"Don't you say it's not as bad as it looks." Sylvain's tone went sour but he went back to pleading. "I know better. You know better that- that those words aren't good. Especially when..." He lost momentum. Shutting his own eyes, knowing what was coming at the familiar argument they were about to have that has happened once before. Except, it seems their roles have been reversed.

"When what? That you would say these exact words to me everytime Miklan hurt you? When you tried to cover up for him?" He was on the edge.  
He finally looked at Sylvain, morphed vision from unfallen tears he was holding in for as long as he could. "What else can I do? If I said anything then.... Well look," his voice cracked, "I'm- I have to- I don't understand why you did this? I was FINE."

He was hurt. Sylvain's tone showing how much this whole situation he caused affected him as well. "No. You weren't. You'll breakdown if you keep living this way. Or worse." His arms fell from the shoulders he was holding when Felix stood up.

"I don't care!" His sudden outburst had Sylvain jump back from him, still seated and looking up. "I don't care Sylvain." He snapped curtly. "Why did you think this was okay without asking me first!? Did you even think what could happen? Mom might even have it to where I can't come see you until I improve. Even if after you're released. I already know i'm losing my job! I won't be able to see any of my friends that much. How could you-"

A gentle hand around his wrist, Sylvain stood with him. "Stop." Bigger hands moved his hands hugging his body into his warmth. Felix was laid on his chest between his collarbone and shoulder, Sylvain's arms now around him, hands on his upper and lower back. Placing his own head on Felix's when lean arms tugged him as close as he could.

"I wanted to do something. After Lysithia told me, I-I was lost and confused. I acted recklessly and made you uncomfortable by doing what I did. I'm sorry for that. I just want you to know, I'm not apologizing for getting you away from them. They're dangerous to be with right now, even if they're good people. They'll just hurt you again."

Pale arms moved from the olders back to between their bodies on his chest. Felix wanted to push him away, he was angry. So angry.

He gave up and clutched the the shirt under his fingers in a tight grip, relaxing his head down on Sylvain. If only it was always this easy to calm down.

"I know.... I know they will. I'm just not-" Sylvain waited for him to find his words. "I'm just afraid of change. Even if it's going to be better for me. This is what i've gotten used to." His head snuggled down more into the scent of detergent that the clinic uses and behind it the faint scent of Sylvain's soap he uses. "And i'm not sure if i'm ready for it." He mumbled into the chest under him.

Sylvain let out a sigh of relief, eyes closing. This got out of hand fast and he was terrified that Felix would cut him out for sure after this. "You're never ready. Trust me on this." He took his head off black locks and raised Felix's chin up to look at him. "You try to fix it on your own or ignore it, it will only blow up in your face later. Can you make another promise with me?" A questioning hum greeted him.

Eyes rimmed red and puffy. Cheeks starting to turn cherry. "What is it?" His voice croaking from his locked throat.

"No more secrets, from either of us. No more hiding things anymore. We tell each other everything."

"Everything?"

"Absolutely everything." He smiled. "And I mean all the good, all the bad," he cradled red cheeks, thumbs rubbing under tired eyes. "Even the things you don't think are worth mentioning. I want to learn everything about you again." Water gathering under glittering amber at his words. "You really don't understand how much you mean to me." His thumbs running above cheekbones causing the tears to flow with the pressure.

"What I would do for you. What I would give." Foreheads now pressed together, hands falling to entwine their fingers. "You are my world, my everything."

Silence. And then...

"I will." Sure and honest, thick vulnerability. "No more keeping you in the dark. Just don't leave me. Not like everyone else."

Leave him? "This new promise won't hinder our old one. Till death, right?"

And there it was. Weak, but surely there.

A smile. "Right..." This ended so much better than what he thought would happen. 

.......

Until the smile dropped down into a angry frown. "Actually no... I'm still mad at you."

"What? But I-"

"I want you to play something before we leave. On that." Felix pointed to the old piano sitting in the corner of the room, on top of a small stage with spotlights makings the keys shine.

"Felix." He let out an exasperated breath. "That's not mine. And I don't want to do something that would be disrespectful." Oh no... The lower lip. "B-but if you get his permission, I'll play whatever you want. Just ONE song."

"Not more?" Those eyes are going to kill him. They're going to lead him to an early death and he would not be bothered in the slightest.

"Fine. Two. But no more. I'm serious, Fe. Go ask him."

~~~~~~~~~~

The sound of a piano playing sounded out through the room, two sitting at said piano. One playing the keys as naturally as breathing, the other, eyes closed peacefully, revelling in the sound.

A woman sitting at a far table watching them, a hand sporting a glass of her preferred beverage. This is the...... Fifth song he's played. She waited until the rim touched her lip to speak under her breath with a smirk. "What an absolute softie. I see he still hasn't found a way to refuse those pleading orbs." Her vision focused on Felix, "So that spoiled, vulnerable side of you is still here huh?" After her drink she continued, "Everytime he plays, he only seems to get better. Sounds like a professional up there."

"Indeed." The white haired man walked up next to her and responded. "I am surprised he is able to play so beautifully despite his circumstances. Most would have stopped. Do you know if he can play for a long period of time?"

She turned to the man who got close to her, "If he's still as crazy about it as he was, then yeah. He can no problem."

Dedue, now peaking in interest only answered with a simple, "I see."

~~~~~~~~~

"Thanks for returning him. I assume everything has been arranged?" Mercedes asked once they returned to the clinic.

"Yes. I'll go over the details with Seteth as soon as I am able. Perhaps Monday if he isn't too swamped with work. Sorry for returning him so late and breaking protocol." Fana responded kindly. 

"No, no. That's perfectly fine. I'll let Seteth know and he'll understand surely. You have nothing to say sorry for." The short haired blonde spoke back just as sweetly.

Fana smiled at her before speaking again to Felix. "Time to go. It's late and the ride back is at least half an hour. I'll shoot your father a message and tell him we'll be there tomorrow for your things. Let's go Felix..... Felix?"

She huffed fondly seeing the two teens sitting at one of the couches in the parlor, practically sitting on top of one another, side by side. Her son resting his head on Sylvain's shoulder. And Sylvain with his arm around his back, hand on his black hair, keeping him close. 

"Allow me, Mrs. Fraldarius." Mercedes told her before making her way to the two lost in themselves, hands in front of her, clasped together lightly. "Sylvain. Time for bed. You should have been in your room two hours ago." Smile showing genuine care but also the one that told him no arguing.

"Uh, yeah. Sorry Mercedes. Guess I lost track of time." The hand not touching Felix going to his nape and rubbing it sheepishly. Looking over at his boyfriend, he ran his fingers through raven locks as he said his goodbye for the night. "I'll see you when you get back?" He assisted the other to stand up with him.

A pale hand took his from soft hair and moved it to Felix's flushed cheek and kept his overtop of Sylvain's. "Mmhm." He leaned more into the hand he put there, letting his eyes shut in content.  
So cute. He wants to make him happy. Keep him safe.  
Make him his and only his.

'You're no different. You're a monster too.'

"I'm not.."

"I'm sorry Sylvain. Did you say something?" Mercedes asked.

"No. It's nothing."

~~~~~~~~~ 

Fana quickly glanced over to her son before looking back to the road. The night sky blackened the earth and the lights of town and the stars above twinkling through the windows in the vehicle. The car ride was silent. It was a peaceful one though.... She couldn't say the same for Felix. Not completely. He was more relaxed yes, but she could see how nervous he was.

"May I?" She asked quietly, hovering her hand over one of his that was shut on his leg. He nodded stiffly. Her hand landed on his and held firm and with assurance, "You'll get through this. All of you... You. Sylvain. Dimitri. Even Rodrigue. You are all strong and I'm here. For anything. Just say the word." His hand turned over and held hers silently the rest of the ride.

~~~~~~~

He was settled into his 'room' for the night. This is where he's going to be staying now.... It's odd. The color of bright teal a little hard on his eyes. He likes the colors being a bit darker. The rug isn't soft enough. The room and the bed is too big as well. The more he looks at the room, the more he wants to go back.   
No. Stop thinking so weakly. He can't give up this fast. He can handle this. He's handled worse and got through it. This is no different.

His mother knocked before entering and said in the crack of the door without coming in. "I'm right dowm the hall if you need me okay? Doesn't matter what it is."

"Mm. Thanks."

"Goodnight Felix. Try to sleep well. We'll get everything set up to how you like it so we can get you settled in better."

"...Goodnight." Her little smile gave him reason enough to return it back.

Later he was tucked in bed, looking up to the rough ceiling. The house is dark and very quiet. It's nice, albeit being offsetting to him. He might have to get a fan or something to make some form of noise or even a clock. Other than that, he can see himself liking living here. The house was spotless when they walked in. There was nothing around that gave him the cleaning itch he always felt. He was.... Lax, body losing more tension with each passing minute. Maybe, just maybe... This might not be too bad.

~~~~~~~~~

He woke late all because his phone was dead and the reason, because he didn't have his charger. He splashed his face to rid himself of sleep and only became more baffled from how tidy everything in the bathroom was. Objects placed in the exact way he liked it. The polished snow white interior of the bathroom shining and the colors blending in just right. 

He didn't much care for the clothes, or rather how they fit. They WERE his size, they fit perfectly. That was the issue. The mirror he was facing proving why he didn't like it. He was twisting his body, looking at every angle. He hated this.

Fitting jeans and a turtleneck t-shirt that hugged his body way too tightly. White boots, halfway up his calf that looked way too white to wear just anywhere. They're nice but completely wasted on him. Wearing them today wouldn't be so bad right? It's not like he's going anywhere. He's just going to go see Sylvain anyway after work and- wait... WORK!

"Fucking hell.. Shit!" He needs to find a phone. Barreling out of 'his' room, he walked down into the open living room that was just as bright (if not brighter) than the colors of his room. Did the colors of the house have to clash so hard. Teal in his room, the brown in here too light to be chocolate but too dark to be beige. She's always been more into style and fashion and it's clearly showing seeing her house again. Everytime he visits, she's made a newer, better change.

Fana didn't hide her fondness for pictures either. All over the wall in the hall, on almost every piece of furniture that could hold them. Seeing these pictures again after awhile does something to him. She's not hiding their past or trying to bundle it up to suppress her feelings.

She has took her regrets, her sorrow, her past mistakes, and released them. Unlike the rest of them, including himself to some degree. It shows up why she left now. It must have been hard to move on when everyone else around you is still stuck in the past. 

A mother who came close to losing one of her children from attempted murder and miraculously didn't due to them getting help at the exact moment they needed it....  
Only to lose her other one barely a year later.  
Instead of trying to recover together from the loss, her husband succumbed to guilt and started drinking more and more. Not thinking that she was suffering too.  
Her last remaining son pulling away and completely changing from how he used to be.  
And lastly, trying to care for an old friend's child who himself was already greatly affected by his father's death, was made to go even more insane from finding the scene of her oldest child's body. 

He stopped himself from saying old man and called for Fana. He heard her answering hum coming from the kitchen. He entered and the walls were orange ... More of a tangerine really. It lit up the atmosphere yet it was soft enough to not 'pop'. Annette's hair came to mind.

His mom already sitting at the table, coffee in one hand, her tablet in the other. Most likely reading up on news, weather, or maybe even one of her case files. At hearing him enter she stopped reading and sat her tablet down away from her. "Hey sleepy head. I was wondering when you'd wake up. Must have been really cozy to sleep in so late." Smile generous and careful.

"I'm late for work aren't I? I hope Ashe and everyone else isn't-"

"Sit and eat." She cut him off. "Don't worry, I already called and explained to Ashe you won't be working this weekend. I didn't go into detail of why of course. He said it was perfectly fine and not to worry. So relax, and eat. You must be hungry." He was. When did he last eat yesterday? And if Ashe already knows then, it's fine. Hold on-

"Did you give him enough time to find someone to replace me?"

"Yes. I called three hours before you're supposed to head in. Don't worry about any responsibilities today okay? I want you to eat up and get full, we'll go to Rodrigue's and you can pack up your things and after that, i'll drop you off at the clinic. I'll bring you're stuff here. You can spend the day with Sylvain and stay the night like usual. You won't have to think about unpacking until tomorrow. If you're okay with it, I can even unpack with you or do it all if you want."

This is.... weird. Other than pack, he won't have anything to do today. And he gets to spend that time with- this really isn't seeming too bad. He won't hear from Edelgard for at least a month. Since the planning could take awhile and even if she has connections, not many would take the chance of getting on Margrave's bad side. Regardless of how much they could get out of doing this. If they succeeded, they'd get quite the reward. But if they failed..... Well, there was a reason he didn't have many enemies. 

"I can do it all later. Thanks for offering." He got caught up in his thoughts again.

"No problem, Felix." She nodded her head towards the counter, "I know you prefer tea, but all I have is coffee right now. I'll get some when I go out for groceries."

"That's fine. I don't mind coffee." He went to make himself a cup while she watched him carefully. No sugar, just a little bit of milk. He may not care for sweets but, he doesn't really like when things are too bitter either.

Once he sat down, her whole demeanor changed. She now was cautious and insecure. "....I missed being with you. I hate that you had to come back this way but, i'm happy you're here."

"I- me too." 

~~~~~~~~

"You sure about this Bernadetta? I mean, i'm fine cosplaying this but, are you sure Felix is okay going with it?" Sylvain asked while keeping his arms up and away from his body for the girl to look at any issues with the outfit. "After all, their relationship is debated on quite a bit."

"Of course he is. He said as long as I didn't make him look too weird. Like he cares about pointless stuff like that. Either way, people look at their relationship as friends or lovers, it's what you two are anyway. So don't fret over it." She answered him as she was checking over all the areas.

"I guess you're right. The characters you're using are different than what I was expecting."

"I got curious after Vyleth mentioned it to me. He said to watch the anime adaptation first since it was the weakest in his opinion. Then play the game, then read the manga. We have similar interests so I figured, why not?" She was shrugging with relaxed shoulders. "And I ended up enjoying it more than I thought."

"Vyleth is the one who's been teaching you more about computers right?" At seeing her blush, Sylvain's teasing side grin made itself known. "Oooh. What is that I see there? Do you like them?"

"He's just a friend! Nothing else! Shut up, Sylvain! Or i'm gonna prick you with one of my pins!" Clutching her fists and bringing them to herself, redness spreading futher across her face from her nose. After the last few hours she's been here, he finally managed a full hearty laugh.  
She supposes she can allow the teasing for now with that contagious, truthful laugh of his as she started giggling along. The laughing fit ended and she cleared her throat, "Okay. Now let Bernie focus. I want to get this just right."

~~~~~~~~~

"Done! What do you think?" Bernadetta asked, putting away her supplies. Sylvain went to the bathroom mirror and she heard his comments of absolute adoration and approval at her skills. She did a playful roll of her eyes with a carefree smile. "Get in here so I can work on the wig next." They've only known each other for two years but he's made such an impact on her life. Coming here with nonexistent self-confidence and esteem, to now. She's not there yet but Sylvain and Felix both started her on her way to trusting others.

Now having him sit in a chair, she pulled the cuff earrings off with orange feathers, bright yellow beads holding them at the top. She was now standing in front and brushing his hair in place. Pins in her mouth, she was putting his bangs and stray hairs back and sliding them in. "Just a little more.... There we go." Speaking to herself as she finished. She put the wig on him and grabbed a pair of scissors. "Let me get another look at their hair.." Pulling up her phone and shoving it at Sylvain. "Hold it there please... Thanks."

"You could just use that temporary hair dye. It would be less work on you." 

She tutted and sarcastically answered, "With how bright your hair is? Hah!"

His face mirrored a pouting puppy. "What's wrong with my hair?"

"It wouldn't go all the way through. His hair is more of a light brown. To cover the red in yours, I'd have to get a real dark one and it would throw it off."

"Oh. Is it really that red?"

"Like the fire you see in the sunset."

~~~~~~~~~

She's so thankful that they're here in her life. And she'll be there behind them every step of the way. It seems like it was so long ago that she met them. It was hard when she came here after being pulled from her "family". 

Eventually, after warming up to some of the nurses and doctors and the place itself, she started eating by her lonesome in the eating areas. And that's how she met Sylvain. At first, she didn't like him. Not understanding why he approached her every day and tried to sit with her and attempt conversation. She thought he was making fun of her. Afterall, during activities, he would be in the center of attention with most other patients. Always getting them to laugh or relax along with the workers of the place. Bernadetta made it a point to avoid everyone else other than her specific caretakers.

'He has a lot of friends. It's easy for someone that looks and acts like that to make them. It must be nice... To be able to express yourself so easily.'

At least, that's what she thought. Until she seen Felix for the first time. Then she understood immediately. That Sylvain... Wasn't actually truthful to all the others. An absolute front to the people around him. 

It was a complete accident how she seen him the first time. Honestly! It was! She didn't mean to impose on them that night. But if it weren't for that night, she wouldn't have tried to understand him better.

She woke up one night and was unable to get back to sleep. So, she decided to be particularly brave and relax in the parlor as she read. As she got closer, she heard the music filling the empty space in the room and travel into the open hallway leading to it. She stopped and leaned out of sight to hear, clutching her book to her ghostly white shirt.

It was gorgeous. Beautiful. So gut wrenching that it brought chills all over her body. So powerful in its pain and hardship. If you listened close enough, you could hear the hope and faith that was still present behind the sadness. Who was this? And why haven't they ever played during the day. She would gladly come on her own if it meant hearing music like this. She could just close her eyes and stay here to hear this and never get bored picking at all the feelings and emotions in the melody.

Purple hair fanned her face when she was unable to keep her curiosity back to see who it was and peeking around the corner. And the first time she saw them, she'll never forget. A black haired boy with short hair, barely passed his shoulders watching in fascination, gold twinkling in his eyes, never taking his sight away from the pianist's face. And if he did, it was to watch their fingers expertly roll against the white and black keys on the old piano sitting in the far side of the room.

How long she watched them she didn't know for sure. On the occasion that Sylvain would stop playing for a few minutes to rest his hands and shake the stiffness from his fingers, sometimes the younger would take over and massage the others fingers for him, pushing down, moving from his palm to the tip of his finger. Both of them would look lost in their own little world everytime he took a break. Small, quiet conversation between them, Sylvain's eyes locked on gold, not once looking away.

She never seen that smile before. It's so... different from the one she always sees on him. He's not loud, or trying to break the silence with a joke or some strange random topic. Just sitting there. Basking in the presence of this mysterious boy that Bernadetta is just now seeing. There was a pause between them when the smaller hands stopped pushing on the ones in their hold. Sitting there, hip to hip, Sylvain's hands being held, his head moving to the side in confusion from his guest stopping his massage.

"What's wrong, Felix?" His voice was so soft. 

Gold drifted to the side and a blush rose across his cheeks and nose. "We're close.. is all."

Sylvain stiffened, sweat starting to bead on his forehead. "I-I'm sorry. I'll move away-"

"Don't!" He exclaimed enough to be considered a loud whisper. "It's okay. It really is. I'm not..." He looked up from their laps, flush getting more prominent the longer he was starting up at the older teen. 

A deep inhale, "Okay... We can stay like this then." Felix started to lean in, raising up slowly to match the difference in height, lowering eyelids giving away what he was planning. Bernadetta felt the cherry rush start to spread against her own face watching.   
Is this a first kiss?   
She's intruding. She wants to watch though..   
No! This isn't for Bernie to see. She made to leave to give them privacy.

But then, as she was turning at them being RIGHT there at touching lips, Sylvain slowly pulled away, seemingly in pain, "I can't."

The look in Felix's eyes was ripping at the seams of her heart. She doesn't even know him.He wanted to say something. That much she could tell. He backtracked and said, "It's okay. I understand." With a shaking, meek voice he changed topic. "I want to hear another song. Play it for me?"

"Of course. As much as you want."

And suddenly, there was an unseen wall between them that she could sense from so far away.

~~~~~~~

"Hey? Do you think Felix will be here?" Dorothea asked while adjusting the strap on her shoulder with her laptop.

"Not yet. He won't be here until he packs up." Ingrid answered Dorothea as they entered through the doors. "I have to go in today so, by the time he gets here, I might not be."

"Sooo.. The one who is here...The girl you told me about? Bernadetta right? What's she like?"

Ingrid paused in her step and thought, hand under her chin. "She's- uh... Well she is- how do I say this?" She had a 'A-ha!' Moment by putting her fists together, smile back in place. "She's a bit different. Quiet but eccentric. Once she warms up to you though, she's very sweet. Don't take it personally if she flinches away from you at first."

She picked back up her steps to the room, Dorothea next to her.

~~~~~~~~~~~

"Sylvain! Bernadetta! I'm coming in!" Sylvain looked up from the book he was invested in, not reacting to the squeak next to him. The door clicked unlocked and the two girls came in. Dorothea was grinning awkwardly and Ingrid.... Shit! She crossed her arms. Face frowning in that exact way he knows he's going to get lectured.  
Or smacked.

"Heeyyy! What's up?" Might as well try to act like he's oblivious.

"Don't." Harsh and ripe coming from her. "You know what's up. Don't act stupid Sylvain. I know you're not. It's only going to piss me off more." She pointed her finger at him, "What happened? Why did you do what you did? I know you don't care much for Dimitri and Rodrigue right now but, that was uncalled for on your part."

He up and stared blankly at her across the room, after some thought he turned to Bernadetta, smiling enough to put her on ease. "Why don't you go to the parlor? You won't be able to focus here." The small girl played with her objects and glanced at him, Ingrid and Dorothea, the door, then back to him. "It'll be fine. I promise." At his assurance, she got up and headed for the parlor, the door closing making a loud click as it shut.

"Now, Sylvain. Tell me what's-"

"They're hurting him." He cut her off so quickly. Not giving her time to ask.

"Huh? What are you-" She looked around to get her bearings, "Hurting him?"

"I only did what I did because I didn't have a choice. I couldn't bear the thought of him being there any longer."

"Was that your decision to make either? I don't think so."

"What SHOULD I have done then? You have no business telling me what I did was wrong. You had no problem involving yourself in his business when you thought I was leaving bruises all over him! You don't even know the full story or that he was getting treated the way he was in the first place!" He snapped at her. Her emerald eyes wide with shock at his outburst. 

"Hey, Sylvain.." Dorothea walked up to him and got in front of Ingrid. "Remember what I said?" Honey eyes flashed with remembrance. "Don't say anything that you can't take back." He let the anger leave him. "I'm going to go give her some company outside. I'll be back soon." She put her hand on Ingrid's shoulder on the way out to give encouragement.

"The full story...." The blonde drifted off. "What is going on? If it's that bad, why hasn't he told me? Only you?"

"He didn't tell me either. I found out from someone else. And the worse thing? They don't know the whole thing themselves. It scared me and when Rodrigue showed up and said what he did, I reacted. I didn't think of anything else other than getting him away. No matter what it took."

She whispered, "Even if he hated you afterwards? What then? You took a big chance." Her voice fragile.

"As long as he's safe." Not an ounce of insecurity in his words.

"Don't give me that! You and I both know-" At his fallen, defeated posture stopped her lecture. Slowly walking up to him, looking up at him.

"...... I know. I know that being without him will make me miserable. But with what I was told of Dimitri's behavior, I knew it was only a matter of time before Felix would be in the same accident. This time I wouldn't be able to get there at all. But even if him hating me is what could happen, at least I would have that security of knowing he can't be hurt like that again."

Again? What did he mean by again? Sylvain being okay with all of the hate from the one he couldn't live without? Ridiculous. Both of them. She punched his shoulder, holding back her full strength but still enough to hurt.

His arm went up to rub where her fist connected. "Ow! Ingrid! What the hell was th-" 

She crushed him in a hug, squeezing him hard. "You idiot.. You reckless, selfish, selfless idiot. I'm gonna die from worry from you three, I swear."

He returned her hug. "I-I'm sorry. I want to change that soon."

"You better. I'm counting on you. Now let's go and join them out there." She pat his shoulders and motioned to the door. 

Once the parlor was in reach, they seen Dorothea already hitting it off with Bernadetta, with the younger looking through something on the others computer, headphones on her head. "Wow! These are really good! You sang this? It's amazing!"

~~~~~~~

"Take all the time you need. I'll be waiting outside the door. I won't let anyone bother you. " Felix nodded as Fana shut the door behind her. First thing, he plugged his phone up to charge. He thought earlier that moving wouldn't be too bad but, looking at his room now, he's starting to hesitate again. The luggage bags sitting on top of his bed, empty and waiting to be filled with his belongings. Is it... Okay to leave like this? What if him leaving causes everything to fall apart? Those two are so terrible at taking care of themselves.

Rodrigue did say that he'll be going to rehab after he finds a good place for Dimitri to stay. Someone who would get Dimitri help too. Then this is fine. It's completely fine. There's no real reason for these feelings, he's being ridiculous. 

He might have jerked the drawers open too hard when he started pulling clothes out and choosing which ones he was taking with him.

~~~~~~~~

Clothes are done, now for the other essentials in his room. Obviously all his pictures, workout gear and items, the box Lysithia got him to hold his ribbon in when he wasn't tying his hair back, the little black cat sitting under it that Bernadetta stitched for him on his birthday last year (she was nervous the whole time giving it to him, afraid he wouldn't like it), a replica sword Ingrid got him hanging up on his wall that she found a few months ago at a old market and Glenn's knife resting in it's case, wrapped in soft, velvet fabric.

He shouldn't need anything else. One of his suitcases smacked into a dresser, making it rock and stumble. He steadied the tall dresser and looked around to see if anything fell. His eyes honed in on a small object, crouching down and picking it up. Eyes wide in disbelief, fingers going through the soft fabric of the lion plush. "I almost forgot about it.." Finger going over a nick on the tip of its ear. He unzipped one of his luggage carriers and softly placed it inside to not crush it when he shut it again. 

~~~~~~~~

"So you two were friends in school?"

"Yes. We wrote music together. Those songs you heard are from us."

"They're great! Why haven't you-"

Dorothea and Bernadetta was in their own conversation at the table, with Dorothea's laptop sitting between them. The music lightly coming from the speakers. Ingrid and Sylvain taken to sitting at the couch in front of the window.

"She sure took up with her fast." Sylvain mumbled out.

"That's Dorothea for you. She has the talent in getting people to warm up to her." Ingrid couldn't help but grin.

Sylvain returned her expression, "It took me a long time for her to open up to me. Dorothea really is something." he then asked, "What are you two doing here anyway?"

"We wanted to see if you wanted to accompany us to get some food before I go in later this evening to work?"

"Evening? I thought you said you worked morning if you worked the weekend." 

"Ashe asked me to take an evening shift since he had to move the workers around a bit today. So can you?"

"I would, I just don't know if Felix is coming or not, or when." He bit his lower lip, "He hasn't called me. And it's passed his usual break time for work. He left in a positive mood last night. Maybe after some thought, he's pissed at me again."

"Maybe it's because he stayed with his mother. He's not used to suddenly switching his schedule like that." Her elbow resting on the back part of the couch, turned to him with her full attention. She said the right thing considering his back straightened from it's sad slump, realization reflecting in his sight.

"Yeah. That's true. Wonder if I could call Fana and ask her?" He asked more to himself, biting the tip of his thumbnail.

"Do you have her personal number?"

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I?" He stopped his nibbling and left his thumb on his bottom lip. She opened her mouth to speak, but quickly shut it when he spoke again. "She's basically my guardian at this point with her paying for my fees. Why?"

Her eyes went big in surprise, "She just doesn't give it to most people is all. I didn't think you knew about her taking over your clinic payments."

His smile was blinding. The smile you would see on a child when they got the present they wanted most. "Felix told me. Can you believe it? I think I finally got through to him."

Sylvain's happiness was contagious, Ingrid following along with his excitement. "That's great, Sylvain! Felix is a hard one to crack. I'm happy you got him to be honest with you." These two idiots. It seems like it won't be much longer that she won't need to intervene. Soon, they'll be figuring it out themselves and maybe, she can relax for a change.

"Now that I think about it... Bernadetta." She jumped and looked back at them. "Could you maybe measure me if you don't mind?"

She looked confused, "I guess. But what for?"

Ingrid side eyed Sylvain. "I want to prove someone wrong."

"Did my comment seriously affect you that much? It's not a big deal Ingrid."

"I know. I just want to show you you're wrong." She stood and put her hands on her hips, acting childish.

He raised his hands in defeat as the tiny purple haired girl got her stuff out. "Alright then, Ingrid. I was joking about it by the way. But if you want to take it seriously, go ahead."

~~~~~~~~~~

Ingrid was in the floor on her hands and knees, staring in horror and disbelief. Dorothea was rubbing her back, Sylvain was laughing so hard he was holding his stomach in pain, but couldn't stop due to Ingrid's reaction. In the meantime, Bernadetta was watching them all as if they'd lost their minds. "What is going on?" 

Her question went unanswered as they all continued what they were doing. Until Ingrid said to herself in the same way as her expression, "I can't believe it... It's true.."

Dorothea, trying to comfort her as best she could said, "With the type of exercising he does most likely. Remember Ingy, your training regimen focuses more on your arms and legs. Not your overall figure. Nothing wrong with that. Besides, Bernie said it was barely a half inch difference in your hips and waist. Shut up, Sylvain!" Reprimanding him as he continued to let out his final chuckle and wiping his eyes. There was a groan as Ingrid drooped even further to the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I could not make myself satisfied on this chapter for some reason. I rewrote certain scenes over so many times and I'm still not completely happy with it. Ithink I dropped some good hints on the characters Bernie chose to draw the lines easy enough. Fana won't be that prominent for long, she'll eventually fade away from the spotlight. Things are about to get crazy. I have a good chapter coming up (ar least I think so.


	15. Long weekend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Packing up: Check  
> Watch the news: Check  
> Have a fight with boar: Check  
> Meet up with Sylvain: Pending  
> Get surprised by someone he wasn't expecting to meet today and make a connection: Check?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is it just me or are these chapters getting longer?

Felix kept his hand on the door, collecting his nerves one more time. He's really doing this. He's really leaving this house. His old home. 

Head now laying on the back of his hand, he let out a long breath. Insides still having the dull ache it had since last night. A chime in his back pocket alerted him. Another text message?

Please call me or text me something. Sylvain is having an aneurysm where you haven't called. 

Has he took his medicine?

Yes. But Bernadetta said he hasn't ate much. Just enough to not give him a stomachache from the meds. I was going to make him go eat with us but he isn't budging until he hears something from you.

What a blockhead. Felix couldn't keep the twitch on his lips going up.

Tell him i'm going to be a little longer and to go with you. That moron needs to-

The phone started ringing.  
Ingrid's name blaring at him now.  
"What?"

"Felix!" What a chipper voice. He can see the metaphorical tail wag in his head. In the distance he could hear Ingrid yelling at him to give the phone back.

"What are you doing? Stop being difficult and go eat with them." The groaning pout let out made his smile rise.

"But they're being so mean Fe! I can only take so much abuse. Bernadetta threatened me with one of her sewing pins, Ingrid is being straight up mean ever since she found out that- Hey!"

"Give it back! Don't you DARE tell him that!" A commotion went on for a good minute at what Felix believes is the two fighting over the phone with he assumed was Dorothea trying to get them to stop.

Another voice cut in, "That's enough. You're starting to upset some of the other patients in here with all this yelling. If you can't calm down, you need to leave and Sylvain won't be going anywhere." Linhardt keeping his sleepy voice low but also showing his frustration with the teens.

Everything ended, the silence starting to make him think one of them accidentally hung up. Until they said their apologies and got quiet again. He heard the exhausted sigh before there was a sounding of a door shutting distantly. 

Ingrid hissed, "Sylvain! You- Mmpphh!" Sylvain must have shoved his big hand on her face to keep her away from the phone. Completely insufferable.

His chortled laughter got closer. "Will you be able to come with us?"

"I don't think so."

"Oh..."

".... But I might be able to meet up with you." 

A gasped, "Really?" Too much brightness in a voice.

"Mm. Just have Ingrid send me where you're going but, that doesn't mean I will be there for sure. And stop shoving in everyone's face how much shorter they are. You giant idiot."

Sylvain chuckled, "I'm not that tall, you guys are just so short. I really hope you can make it." His fondness leaked out in his last sentence.

"Yeah, me too."

"We have a lot to talk about, don't we?"

"Don't remind me.. I don't even know where i'm gonna start."

"T-that much? How much have you been keeping secret?" He sounded rather impressed around his being baffled.

"You might actually implode with how much i've been doing."

"Oh, wow... Uhh. Well, I guess it's a good thing we have all weekend then. I'll make some popcorn and everything." 

Leave it to him to make it sound nowhere near as serious. "Better make something spicy too. You always brag about how great you are with your hands. Put them to good use."

"Anything for you baby." Said unthinkingly, a reflex.

Everything went quiet other than the "Ugh! Sylvain, really?" From Ingrid after that. White noise in his ears. This sensation in his chest and it's filling so fast. Heart beat beating so hard he can feel it through his chest.

It occurred to Sylvain the same time as Felix. Hearing the sharp intake the red head make and soon sputtering out, "Oh my god, Felix. I'm so sorry if I just made you- I didn't mean to- well no- not that I didn't mean to call you that but-" A smacking sound came through, "Fuck, i'm an absolute moron." Muffled through his hand on his faceI. "I-i'll try to not do that aga-"

"It's fine." He said a bit too fast and pushy. "I actually..." His cheeks felt getting warm. 

"Are you sure?"

"Uh huh." The relief he heard on the other line got him to think.. They would get to that another time.

"Then... I guess i'll head out with them. Don't work yourself too hard. Don't be discouraged if you have to take a break." Low, quiet and affectionate voice of his running through the speakers.

"I'm only getting a few bags together. It's not like i'm doing anything draining." Withholding the fluttering butterflies in his stomach.

"It's more than that. Please sit down if you get overwhelmed."

"Alright. Fine. Just go and eat already!  
....Thank you."

"No problem, Felix."

With nothing more to say, they said their goodbyes and hang up. In his talk, Felix had turned to leaning his back against the door. The promise they made..  
All the things he's gotten involved with, the people too. Some are questionable at best while the rest is crimes and illegal at worst. And now he has to tell Sylvain everything. Will he want him to confess? Not ready for that either.

"Do you want some help moving your things outside?"

At hearing Dimitri's question, Felix hurriedly straightened himself and gathered up his things. "No. Especially not from you. You're not supposed to be here." Looking at him would help him see how close he was, but Felix refused to. He can't look at him right now.

"I know I shouldn't be but I... I want to apolo-"

"I won't accept it. Leave me be."

"Then, at least let me help you." 

He reached down and right before his fingertips grazed the suitcase, a ghostly pale hand snatched it away from him. "Don't you ever touch my things, or me, ever again." Felix's voice sharp and hateful. Amber eyes narrowing further in disdain, "I'm done with communicating with a beast that can't control it's temper."

Ice blue eyes lowered, "I'm apologizing. Isn't that what i'm supposed to do?" His back straight, legs shoulder length apart. He's challenging Felix, trying to get him to cower away.

He didn't give him what he wanted. He stood his ground, "Doesn't mean I have to accept it." He said nonchalantly, clutching his fists to hide his fingers beginning to shake.

"Then I hope you don't mind me feeling cross with you. As this whole situation was caused by you." Matching Felix's casual tone.

A tick of anger, "What? How is this my fault? Cause I know for a fact out of all three of us that were living in here, I was the least delusional."

"You just can't let any of this go, can you?" Dimitri laughed in his words. "Are you seriously still that angry over things that happened years ago? And you're still holding us responsible?"

"Don't you even point your finger at me boar!" He seen the twich of Dimitri's eye with the name. "I'm not the one living in the past. You two are! I'm the one who has to deal with YOUR tantrums. And you know what?" He somehow got all his bags up in his hold, some hanging from each arm and one he had to hug to his body when he ran out of arm room. He turned his back, "I'm done with it... From now on, just stay the hell away from me."

He almost made it to the end of the hall until Dimitri replied, "So this is it? This is the outcome you're okay with? It's a little disappointing that you are so willing to go along with this."

Don't turn around. Don't turn around. He's just trying to get a reaction, a response. Don't ask, don't turn around. Don't. Turn. Around. Keep walking..

He only made it a couple steps, then sighed, frustrated at himself. Letting his head to turn back, "This? What are you talking about?"

Blue eyes flickering with relief, "I let you go back to him and I could've stopped you... You would've let me too. You would be so much better off if I did. Now, you're just going to be stuck to him for the rest of your life because you think you owe him that." 

"Excuse me?" He feels his stomach roll in unease and disgust. "Let me go back? Since when are you my dictator?" He scoffed. "Who are you to say this? Like you're much better."

Dimitri's eyes went to the floor, "I'll get better. Don't you want to have a future? With him, you'll constantly have to make sacrifices." That hit a nerve. He's doing the same thing that he did to Sylvain. So he wants to play that game with him? He's fishing for information.

He didn't stop. He kept walking. "Fuck you. You sound exactly like the old man now.. Sylvain sacrificed everything for me. The least I could do is make a few for him. What have you done that's good for me?" He has to stay alert. Dimitri could snap any second now and Felix wasn't helping by fueling the flames. 

He kept his ears open to hear if Dimitri was following him.   
He wasn't. He went right instead of left to go into the kitchen. He has to get his cutting knife. Annette left a message saying she'll bring him some fruit to take to the clinic today. Saying she wanted Sylvain to try -ugh- cotton candy grapes. 

He passed a glance left to see outside the windows near the front door. Rodrigue and Fana were speaking at her car. He sat the bags down at the open archway and started picking through the drawers and cabinets, looking for a specific one.

Not finding it in any of the usual places, Felix started to leave the ones he looked in open, getting angsty not being able to find it. "The hell is it at? I know I left it in here."

"-ooRAAAHH!" Felix jumped from his skin from the booming yell coming from the left.   
The absolute fuck? Leaning back and looking around the archway to see who yelled like an idiot. There was someone outside talking to Fana. When he seen who it was he grunted. 

Caspar. 

Dumbass. What's he doing here? It looks like Byleth is with him. They must be taking a run through the neighborhood and decided to take a run up here. There it is! He grabbed the knife and stuck it in the holder on his belt.

His eyes closed in irritation, sensing the presence behind him. "Going to actually talk about what you want now instead of the bullshit you spewed in the hallway?"

"Yes. I want to ask you about something I overheard." All of Dimitri's anger had dispersed, no emotion present now in his words. What a bad sign. He won't be able to read him now, he's unpredictable.

Felix slowly stood from crouching in front of the cabinet under the sink. He barely picked up his speed in turning around, then leaned against the sink counter and crossed one leg over the other with his arms doing the same. "Let me guess..."

"Who is Whip and Lore?"

"And there it is." He said aggravated. "I already told you. I don't know. Can't you just chalk it up to that douche being exactly that. He was trying to get me riled up and he succeeded."

"No." He shook his head, blonde bangs staying in place over one of his eyes. "You didn't start reacting until he mentioned Miklan." His entire body jolted just hearing that ass's name. "You didn't say anything with those two."

"Maybe because, I don't fucking know them. Why are you always asking this? You know I don't like talking about it!" Felix spat out. 

"Are you sure you don't know? Did Miklan mention them the night he died?"

"I don't know, dammit! I can't remember!" His lungs are getting heavier with each breath.

"Guess I don't have a choice then..." Reaching to his back pocket and tugging out his phone. 

The click it made from him unlocking it set Felix on the defensive. "What are you doing?" Blue eyes glowing from the light the phone was putting off. Dimitri didn't answer. "Whatever it is, it's not going to help you. Give it a rest." The blonde continued to scroll through his phone, not paying his words any mind.

"On the event of last night's excitement during the festival, tragedy struck the Gautier household." He read to Felix.  
What?  
Dimitri continued, "A person not yet identified snuck onto the property and attempted to kidnap and/or murder the youngest son (name omitted due to age restrictions) of Margrave Gautier."

"Are you serious right now?" He's reading the old news report released to the public. "You know that's just a made up story. Why are you-"

Ice looked through blonde eyelashes, stare burning a whole through Felix. Saying each word slowly, threateningly. "Let me read it." Tone leaving Felix to swallow his building apprehension.  
"Miklan Gautier, eldest son, succeeding in pushing the attacker back and allowing himself and his younger brother to make it to the family cabin farther back into the area. Things turned sour when he was trying to hold the line and prevent the unknown person from entering the cabin."

Black eyebrows furrowed down low, trying to pinpoint where exactly the one reading was getting to. The story told to the public was falsely wrote where Margrave paid them off. The only ones who know the true story of Sylvain doing it are the medical team involved with him, the police that were there and close enough family and friends. 

The public could find out the truth if they dug it up well enough. It's not like Miklan hid his creepy interest all that much. However, as long as one critical plot point didn't get put out, they won't ever look. And Felix is assuming that Dimitri wanted to see why exactly that one thing was left out.

"Why did they leave you out Felix? You were completely erased from the story. Like you weren't ever there." Asked with good intention for Felix, yet not comforting with the madness lurking behind his pupils. Just waiting to come out to show just how insane his mind could get. Or, was he suspicious?

He guesses that's one thing that Dimitri still has that made him think that the old him was still there at times. To find and deliver justice. Too bad that now, to him that means to do whatever he has to. No matter how immoral his actions.

"You know why.." Letting his rude, snappy attitude go, he answered with as little hostility as he was able. "If they put me in there, then everyone would've had to admit how disturbed that thing really was.. And they couldn't have that person be the one that the Gautier family heir that was going to take over was known for."

"And you're okay with them still having the mindset of him being a good person?"

"I'm not."

"Then why not say anything?" Dimitri's growing frustration from his confusion making him move closer. Felix felt his muscles tighten. It's taking everything in him not to try to get away.

"I don't like the outcome, but I can't say anything. Not yet.."

Hating how they still put him on a pedestal when he was nothing more than a drug addict that preferred Felix's company way too much after his and Glenn's fallout.

"Why not? Why should they keep praising him when he did something as awful as trying to kill you two?" 

He looked up and into Dimitri's muddled vision and said, "Would you believe that it was self defense knowing the state the wolf was in? Especially since we only had 'minor injuries'?" 

"That's-" His crystal eyes started to become more clear. "It's where you tried to get away right? You and Sylvain were running from him. You did what you could until you sprained your ankle and Sylvain had to think of something." Should he tell the boar? It's hard to know what he would do. Would he get angry? Storm through the front door of Margrave's house and demand answers? Would he try to convince Felix to let him help? Go on with his day like he wasn't told anything? Would he call Felix a liar, that he was just not remembering right? Or-

Would he see him like he was that night from now on, all the time? A helpless, poor victim that can't take care of himself and feel like he couldn't take his eyes off him or he'd be snatched away again. To be afraid to touch him or say anything that might hit too close to what was done and cause Felix to return to that moment. They way that he's treated when he's alone in public with- no, he won't get into that right now.

"Are those your feelings about it or do you agree with my old man?" What he answers with is what will make Felix decide on what to say.

"I- my feelings on it..." Dimitri finally fixed his bang by pushing it back by his hand sliding back and over his head and down his neck until it fell back to his side, thinking of how to put his feelings into words. His thin lips opened and- "I feel like if it was me I would have done the same." Felix was surprised at that. He stayed quiet from the confession. "I wouldn't have thrown him in the well. However," Felix hasn't seen this face in a long time on Dimitri. "If we were trapped and you couldn't run. If I wasn't confident that I could run faster than him when carrying you and I couldn't think of anything else, I wouldn't even have an inkling of a thought to restrain Miklan. I would fight him.. And if that ended in him being lifeless, if both of us were okay after that, I wouldn't hesitate to do it."

"..."

"Felix?"

His vision, moving from Dimitri's feet to his eyes over and over, unable to keep his eyes on the other. Words caught in his throat, air in his lungs gathering. Maybe not everything, but just enough? It won't hurt to give him a hint or two right?   
"Do you know why we gave him the name wolf?"

"Do I know the reason?" His head tilted to the side, breaking his eyes away from Felix to look at nothing and search in his mind. "I can't say that I do? You two were always secretive about it."

"When we were little, mom read to you and me. Do you recall the one with a wolf? What he did?"

Dimitri's lids furrowed, thinking harder. "Are you talking about Red riding hood? Why are you bringing this up?"

"It's pretty similar to how Miklan got when Glenn stopped hanging around him after the incident with the well. You remember right? When Sylvain didn't show up for my birthday and he was missing for a few days?" 

"How he got.... Hmm..." Crystal clear eyes closed, pointer finger folded under his bottom lip and above his chin. "Miklan started to bother you two more, especially you. I remember Glenn getting quite testy with him over it a few times. What does that have to do with the story though?"

"Think of what the wolf did. The same thing happened that night. That's why it's been covered up."

"What?" Dimitri opened his eyes to the sound of Felix walking back to his bags, following him with his sight. "I don't think I understand Felix?" Confusion the only thing left in Dimitri. C'mon, think boar.

With his back to Dimitri, the last thing he decided to offer was, "It's a form of speach. Just... Try to figure it out."

~~~~~~~~~

Felix isn't really making sense. How is Dimitri supposed to figure out what he's saying if he's being so cryptic? He really really needs to find- Felix shut the door, leaving Dimitri to scratch the back of his head, his need temporarily forgotten.

~~~~~~~~~~

He was almost about to open the door. The local news on the TV made him do a double take and his hand fell as he watched. The reporter, with her short dark hair in a layered bob and blue suit with a knee skirt interviewing Margrave.

Margrave himself sporting a nice classic men's suit, hair swept back to keep his hair out of his face. The smile he has so fake it's surprising no one has asked if he had a lift done. For the three of them to have faces so similar, yet look nothing alike.. 

She was asking about how he was doing, that he hasn't been out and about for the last few months. Felix didn't much care until the woman brought up Sylvain and it caused his glare to harden and he threw his suitcase on the couch and picked uo the remote to turn up the volume.

"Mr. Margrave, I heard that Sylvain's therapy is going well. How has he been? I'm sure Miklan's death has been hard on him."

"Ah. Well, he told me that he's getting there. Miklan's death was hard on all of us. He tells me everytime we speak that he misses Miklan so much and how he'll always look up to him."  
Fucking Liar. The remote was being squeezed with the clenching of his fist.  
"I speak with him often and he says he still has trouble remembering what happened. "  
Often? Yeah right.   
"However, i'm not allowed to speak on it much. Last time I did, his lawyer came to my house and sent me up the road, telling me until they have more information I can't talk about it."  
Fana really did let him have it that day. Felix wasn't there but, her assistant told him all about it. At one point they thought that they'd have to go into the room and stop her from hurting the guy. Just imagining his mother, who was barely over five foot, intimidating a man well over six and endowed was hilarious to him.

"Yes, it seems like his lawyer Fana Fraldarius is rather serious about the case. She is someone you know well correct?"

"I knew her in high school from one of my friends. Our children are also good friends. When it came to choosing a lawyer for Sylvain I knew she would be best."  
What a load. He didn't choose, Seteth did. He wanted someone that Sylvain would be comfortable with knowing what happened fully.

"Yes, but there is also another reason i'd like to speak to you today sir."   
Here it comes.  
"There is a rumor that has came out and caused quite the commotion which has led to your company to decline." Felix seen Margrave's shoulders rise and smile falter a brief second. "With the rumor, a lot of singers and entertainers are putting their contracts on hold. They are concerned if it's true that you have been embezzling money from all the fundraisers they have taken part in, including the money earned in the company."

Felix became drawn in, waiting for his reaction and with the nervous sweatdrop that came from the older man. He couldn't keep the smug grin in. Whoever Edelgard got that information to to leak is pretty skilled.

"I honestly don't know where that came up. It's completely false. I would never do such a thing." Margrave picked his mask back up and pulled off the good business man persona that acted like he cared. "Whoever spread that is very misguided and uninformed. I love music and I have always wanted to show that to everyone. Why would I do something to put it in jeopardy?"

The news reporter of course ate up his act. Now back to her cheerful, grin. "I don't doubt you a bit! You have always been the soul of this town! Sorry for asking about that! Now back to something a bit more exciting! It's been coming up with more and more people lately and we all have been curious."

"Ask away." 

"Well," Amber eyes flicked up to above the television and- wait, what's that? He got closer to the TV stand and viewed closer. Felix didn't know what he was looking at. He picked up the small item barely peeking out from behind the frame of the picture of Glenn's graduation from the academy. Wait.  
That's- He started backing away. There's no way.

~~~~~~~~~

Dimitri took a big gulp of water he got from the tap, washing down the residue left from taking his pill without a drink earlier before he started talking with Felix.

He couldn't believe that Felix left all the drawers and cabinets open. Usually Felix kept everything in order without accepting help from Dimitri. The television in the living room got louder, are they gone and Rodrigue is watching it? No, it sounds like the news. Rodrigue doesn't voluntarily watch it if he has the remote. He doesn't spend much time in that room either. He said that he hates how depressing it's gotten over the years. Is Felix still here? All the while Dimitri is still stuck on what he said. Could it be from what he told him? He still has no inkling as to what Felix tried to tell him. Honestly, he's surprised that Felix told him what he did. Especially after what happened. 

How could Dimitri hurt him so? And how long has he been doing it? Has Felix just not said anything and let him do it? All those times that he's seen bruises and the other just throwing the whole issue away, saying it was from practice or training or not knowing it was there at all. It was one reason that at first, Dimitri thought it might have been Sylvain as well with how fast Felix was to skim over the Issue or change the subject entirely. But this whole time, "It was me. I did that to him." His guilt starting to fester in his stomach.

Just a few more and all the cabinets and drawers will be closed. There was a loud clacking sound and Dimitri's curiosity took over, he'll come back and shut the rest after.

He went and stood in the doorway. The plastic remote in the floor close to the black headed teens feet. Felix was staring at the television, stunned at what was on the screen. He's a bit close to the screen...   
Dimitri forced his eyes onto what had him so taken aback.

The three pictures on the screen had him slightly surprised. It looked to be Sylvain with... Someone Dimitri doesn't think he's met before, or he doesn't remember them. They were all taken from the side and slightly blurred and close enough to see the faces clearly . Though the angles were off. Whoever took them didn't want to be seen. One had the girl hugging him from behind, her chest on top of his head. Another picture that had him hugging her tightly with a laughing smile on her face. The last, they were in each others arms, looking at each other happily. Where are they at? It looks to be some kind of restaurant.

Margrave himself looked a bit perplexed by the pictures, although he was quite happy that Sylvain had found himself a pretty girl he might settle down with. The voices of the two on the screen finally reached Dimitri's ears. "He used to be quite the playboy yes? Do you think this girl is the one for him?"

"I'm just glad he's still looking for someone even after everything that happened. If it's a woman that can keep him in line, I have no complaints."

Dimitri once again blocked them out and checked on Felix again. His golden eyes locked onto the TV. "Felix? Are you okay?" He must not of cared to answer or didn't hear from him not responding. Dimitri is NOT good at things like this. He has to at least try. "I'm sure it's just a misunderstanding on their part Felix. After all, if that is that Dorothea that Sylvain was with in high school and they are best friends, of course they would have had a moment like that. They haven't seen each other in four years."

He wasn't expecting Felix to look at him, his unease only rising with the devastated disappointment in those usually glaring eyes of his. At the very next beat, Felix picked up the bag on the couch and rushed his way to the door. "Felix, wait! It looks bad! But you know how stories can be completely different than what they're showing!"

"Don't talk to me. I want nothing to do with you." Why has he got hostile again!?

He kept following even out the door, even when Fana was asking in surprise, "Dimitri!? What we're you doing!? Have you been in there the whole time!? Rodrigue! You said he went out with a friend!" 

"He did! I don't know what he's doing in there!"

Even when Felix opened the back car door on the shinning blue vehicle and avoided looking at him. Even after he shut the door forcefully and said over his shoulder he was walking and Fana wanted to check and make sure. Even when Felix told him to stop following him. 

He caught him by the wrist, holding on. Felix was attempting to pull away, "Let go!" and when he didn't, Felix swung his other hand in a fist in an attempt to hit him. Dimitri caught it and held both and he increased his grip in retaliation. They've walked quite the distance from the house, barely being able to see the roof from where they are perched on the sidewalk, the trees behind walls barely peeking over them. "Let go, you damn-"

What stopped him was a hand on his shoulder and pulling him back in a light shuffle. "Hey man, he said he wanted to be alone right now. Leave him alone." The other voice distracting him, he loosened his hold. Felix, taking it to his advantage, ripped his wrists away and started making distance between the two and Felix's figure was getting further and further away.

He jerked his shoulder roughly from the boy with sky blue hair, "It's none of your business Caspar."

"Doesn't really seem like any of yours either." His eyes that matched his hair getting serious, "If you keep following him when he wants to be left be, i'll stop you. I like you Dimitri, but don't be an ass or I WILL stop you whichever way I need to."

He was about to call Caspar out on his threat, but then, "You need to stop! Felix is already stressed enough! Stop it, Dimitri!" Annette cut into their stand off, walking up with a bag clutched in her hands. Her hair down and damp from the sweat from trying to keep up. When did she-?

He became baffled. "When is it wrong to check with a friend to see if they're okay?"

"When you straight up start harassing them." Caspar snapped, "That's not helping." Caspar scoffed, "He kept telling you to leave him alone. You weren't listening."

"Fine. But if something happens to him, it will be you two who are responsible." Dimitri replied as he started stomping back to Rodrigue's house. 

~~~~~~~~

Caspar and Annette shared a look of bewilderment at what just occurred. The Dimitri they just witnessed was not the one they were used to. Cyan eyes cut back to Dimitri and he whistled awkwardly, "Wow, well, that was something...."

"Mhm." Annette nodded.

"It wasn't too hard for you to keep up was it? Those shoes aren't really for rushing along." He said looking down at her slip on shoes overtop her tights.

"Oh! It's fine. It didn't bother me too much!" She bashfully commented, dusting her skirt off with one hand. "Besides," She reaches into the front pocket of her jacket and pulls something out and straightens her closed fist to Caspar before turning it over and opening her palm. "This is yours right? It fell off when you adjusted your wrist band chasing after Dimitri." The little piece of light peach(orange?) fabric falling down over the edge of her tiny hand when she spread her fingers out more to clear the wrinkles out.

Sky eyes widen before he quickly picked it from her hand, "Oh man! I didn't even notice! If I lost this, I wouldn't know what I would've done.."

"So you like going to the light festival too? That's the only place you can get those." She asked watching him slide the band down and start to tie the ribbon back on. He was struggling to get it to stay in place. "Let me help." She went and hovered her hands over his until he dropped his and nodded at her.

She began to straighten it out to and tie it and he answered, "Yeah. I've been going every year since middle school to get a new one- for luck on my wrestling matches." She lifted her hands to show she was done and backed up. He checked the ribbon before giving her a nod of thanks and approval before sliding his black wristband over it again.

"You like the color orange?"

"Huh?"

"The orange or peach ribbon."

"Oh! It's faded. Some of the colors fade overtime. I get a red one."

"Every year?"

"Yep. Every year. For the black eagle class. Gotta show my color's yeah?"

"Your very representative. You must really enjoy your class!" She couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm. 

"Huh?... Oh! Yeah! Totally! Red is the best!" He scratched the back of his head, flustered at her attention. "You like these things?" He pointed to his wrist that had the ribbon around it.

"I find them rather neat! I thought you had to get them for someone else for the luck aspect to kick in to its full potential?"

"It changes depending on if you got it for yourself or for someone else." 

"Ummm... How?"

"For instance- let's see a color... I'll use orange since you asked. If you got yourself an orange one, it wouldn't really do much for you." Her blue his widened a but before he continued, "Since it helps your creativity, determination or make you more positive. You're already plenty of that so you don't need it."

Annette blushed at the unintentional compliments. "O-oh."

"Buuuuuuut... If someone GAVE you one, the meaning changes."

"It does?" Asking and trying to rein her blush and pull it back in.

Caspar, not paying attention, kept explaining, "Yeah. At that point the orange ribbon now means that that person is fascinated by you or in other words, they like you. Most people give one to their friends, but i've seen people give one to their crush or newer couples to each other too."

"The meaning is completely different now.. That's amazing!" Completely forgetting about her flushed face and now getting excited about the other meanings. "Do you think you could explain ALL the colors to me?"

"Sure! I don't mind. But, didn't you say you were going somewhere?" He asked her her casually with his fist on his hip.

"Yeah I did but....." Her bright blue eyes looked to the direction Felix stormed off, worry starting to claw and dig back into her brain. "Felix needs some alone time right now. I'll send him a message and he can tell me when he's ready. Until then," Her smile came back as she turned back to the boy, "We can hang out!"

"Awesome! I'm hungry. Want to come with me?"

"Sure!"

~~~~~~~~~~

"Mmm! This is so good!" Annette expressed by moaning around the fork in her mouth. "Thanks for inviting me, Caspar."

"Haha! No problem. It's always more fun to eat with others. What did you put on your pancakes?" He asked leaning forward.

"Sea salt carmel and banana pancakes. I always eat it when I come here with my dad."

"Do you eat here often?" 

Her smile around her fork dropped, "Not much anymore. He's always so busy with work. It's been quite a long time. I mostly eat at the restaurant Felix and you work at now." She jolted, "Not that that place is bad. It's just..." Her blue eyes hit the floor.

"Not quite the same? Guess I can understand to some degree. Ever since my brother started working under our dad, I haven't been spending much time with them either."

She wanted to change the topic so she asked, "What do they do?"

"Mostly security stuff." Her obvious confusion he explained, "Think of what Felix's dad does, he goes out to catch the people yeah?" She nodded, "Well, my dad and brother are the ones who guard anyone who was involved."

Her eyes lit up in understanding. "Oh! So bodyguard and witness protection stuff!"

"Exactly!" His eyes shut and his smile big, "that's why i'm doing the best as physically possible. Our family has been doing it for years. And i'm gonna keep it going too. Even if my brother has it covered. And I don't care if people think i'm "Too frail looking or too small."

"I envy your enthusiasm. I still have no idea what I want to do. And we still have a good couple months until graduation but, to still not have a clue what I want is starting to bother me."

"You'll figure it out. Don't fret over it too much." He took a big bite out of his breakfast sandwich, crumbs falling onto the table and some left on the corner of his mouth. Such a messy eater. Annette giggled to herself. They're so different yet so alike. No wonder Felix and him get along. They don't care about other people's opinions. They're just them.

"You're right. I have plenty of time. It'll most likely just come to me. Sorry to switch again, but i'm curious and pretty interested in finding out more about the ribbons. I did move here about three years ago when I got accepted. However, some things I never really noticed where I was so busy with my classes. I've always wanted to go though."

"Sure thing." He took a big couple gulps of his drink and put it down a bit harder than necessary, letting out a big sigh at quenching his thirst. "So, which color do you want to know about next?" He leaned back to rest against the booth seat.

She tapped her finger on her chin. Which one? Which one should she pick? What about the one Felix has? "What does gray mean?"

"Gray?" Caspar didn't expect that apparently. "That's quite a weird one. I wasn't thinking you'd ask about that." His perplexity changed. He almost looked upset, "Did someone give you a gray one? Who was it?"

"No, no. I just seen one recently and wondered what it meant. Especially now with that reaction you gave."

"Okay." He didn't believe her, but he started to explain. "Honestly, if you get it for yourself that's fine. It mostly just means you want stability and balance in your life, maybe even self-restraint or discipline. It's just.... To give someone a gray one is... Well, It's like telling them that they're dirty, boring or depressing." He finally managed to spit it out after struggling to find what to say.

"That's horrible. Why would people give it out?"

"Most don't. Just some assholes that like to hurt other people's feelings."

"Well, still that's-"

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT!? THAT'S NOT SOMETHING TO SAY SO CASUALLY- AT ALL IN FACT! ESPECIALLY IN PUBLIC!" Annette felt herself almost lift from the seat with the unexpected screaming. Caspar however, not vexed in the slightest, only turned around and put his arm on the back of the booth seat.

"Hey, wasn't that Ingrid? Sounded like her. Wonder who pissed her off this time?" Actually, now that he said something... Annette stood from the booth to look over the other tables and customers. 

It was her! She's being escorted out, along with the girl she's been hanging out with quite a bit here lately. Ingrid does not look happy, as she was stomping her way to the door, face exploding in red with the burnette floating her way behind her, an amused expression on her face. Her green eyes kept flickering back behind them....   
It that Sylvain? They're being kicked out, why does he look so smug about it? 

"Looks like they're having fun." Caspar couldn't help but grin just as big at the trouble makers that were thrown out. Annette watched as Sylvain said something else with gleam in his eye and his smile only grew when Ingrid yelled back at him.

"Yeah. It sure does." She really hopes that Felix is okay.

~~~~~~~~~~

"Fucking boar.. A bit more pressure and he would've broke them..."  
Felix was rubbing his wrists as he was seated on a bench. He ripped away when Caspar interrupted and ran. He wasn't thinking at the time. He's definitely regretting it now.

He shouldn't have left Caspar to deal with Dimitri and the running was definitely a bad idea. After his adrenaline slowed, his feet started stinging. Damn boots weren't meant to run in. Especially not for a good twenty minutes straight. He just knows he's going to have blisters. 

After massaging his wrists a few more minutes, he reached in his back pocket and pulled out the tablet he found on the TV. "Why would he be doing this?" How did he pass the drug test for his assessment? How long has he been-  
No.. He threw his questions away into the back of his subconscious. It doesn't matter why anymore. After what happened with Miklan, Felix made a point to never get involved with ones that do this shit. For a pill that's called what it is, it sure does cause nothing but trouble. 

"So stupid." He mumbled.

"What is?" 

Jerking and turning around, Felix seen a slightly worn hoodie and skinny jeans underneath with hi-tops that looped side to side at the ties instead of crisscrossed. Their hands were stuffed into the front pocket. Felix scrunched his nose, "None of your business Claude. Go away."

"Aww, come on. I was just checking on you. You looked like you were sulking and I wanted to give you some company." He started to walk around the back of the bench. 

Felix quickly put the pill back in the back pocket of his jeans. "Like you could listen for that long and give actual good advice. Don't you have work?"

"I'm going in this evening. I know, weird for me to work evenings on a weekend. Buuuut,-" He looked down at Felix, not sitting next to him and continuing to stand. "Something came up and Ashe switched some schedules around for a few people. Obviously, he won't tell anyone why." He smiled easy, "But they know. Everyone is a little frazzled."

Felix fought the sqirm, "Tch. Yeah. Must be hard to work a different schedule for two days." He couldn't hide the eyeroll that followed.

"That's not the reason." Claude looked forward to the road, eyes now off of Felix. "It's because of what's caused it. You might not realize it Felix, but a lot of the people who work there care about your well being. It's no secret that a majority of us think you work too much and have brought it up to Ashe."

The lump in his throat was hard to push down. "I don't work anymore than the average teen that works while going to school."

"True.. True." Claude's hands still in his hoodie, posture still relaxed. He put more weight to one side and cocked his hip lazily, "Also, doing side under the table pay for Ashe." His body stiffened. Claude took his hands out and started counting on his fingers. "Sparing with Caspar a few days a week at the gym AFTER the yoga or dance class you do with your mother. Cleaning the entire house by yourself, getting what groceries you all need AND cooking breakfast, lunch and dinner when you're there. When the weekend comes and you're so quick to leave like you only live for the weekend. Not to mention the sudden disappearances certain nights and no one hearing from you. You're quite the busy person Felix Fraldarius. Do you ever sit down?"

"The fuck? Are you stalking me!?" He made to stand, the palpitations in his chest increasing.

"What?" Shining green eyes found their way back to Felix and at Felix's reaction Claude lost composure himself. "Wait, no! I'm not, I swear! I heard this stuff from Dimitri. I wasn't stalking you I promise! I just realized how bad all that sounded. I'm sorry for working you up." He lowered his head and put his hand on his nape. 

Felix's breath caught in his throat and he couldn't say anything. 

"Even when I try not to, I do nothing but upset you. I wanted to come apologize to you for the comment I made to you." He sighed hopelessly, "I can't do anything serious right unless I have someone backing me up. I'll just go before I upset you more." 

'Don't.'

"Felix?" His fingers had took Claude's sleeves without him thinking. 

He blinked, and moved his hand away. He sat down sluggishly. "Just sit. And try again." He said quietly. He looked up from the delay, Claude was speechless and unmoving. Amber eyes glared, "I don't have all day to sit here and you stare at me. If you want to apologize, I'd like to get it within the next few minutes."

Claude snapped himself out of his stupor, "Right. My bad." He finally sat on the bench. He kept a good amount of space away to keep Felix comfortable. "Um.. When I said all that about you looking like your brother, I didn't know that you don't like it." He quickly added, "Ingrid told me that, didn't stalk you!"

Felix nodded, "Sure, whatever."

Claude sighed in relief, "If i'd known, I wouldn't have said that. I'm real sorry. I just... Wanted to know about you is all."

"Then why not just... I don't know, talk to me instead of finding out from someone else? Or at least, drop the jokester attitude long enough for me to think you're genuine in your interest and not just trying to piss me off?"

Claude chuckled uncomfortably, "That's the thing. I'm so used to getting people to open up to me with my "charming" nature. When someone calls me out on my behavior, people like you for instance, I get... Intimidated. Like, somehow, you see right through me and know how I really am. That i'm really not this easygoing, outgoing, yet stupid person."

"Stupid?" Felix asked curtly. "You're in the top five in grades and you're in the student council. Anyone who thinks that only takes things at face value. Yeah, when it comes to talking seriously you struggle but, you handle issues that a lot of the students bring up. Edelgard isn't exactly... Approachable with the way she carries herself to most people, even if she's the president. Doesn't help that Hubert is always behind her and glaring. That's why everyone goes to you. What?"

Claude in a word, looked surprised. "I didn't think you could be so honest." The brown haired boy leaning forward with his arms laying inbetween his knees, relaxed.

"I never lie." Claude's smile said otherwise. "Don't look at me like that. I don't."

"No. Of course you don't." Agreeing with the one next to him, smile getting more teasing.

Felix was starting to fluster. "Why are you here anyway? Don't you live a good fifteen minutes away from here?"

"I can't go on a walk?" Felix glowered at him, "Okay, okay. I was actually coming to your house to meet up with Dimitri."

"Dimitri?" Gold eyes widened from their glare.

"Yeah. But, he flaked out on me last minute. Said he had something come up. I was actually about to turn and make my way back home, then I saw you and figured I'd say hi and see if you're feeling okay."

"Oh." Felix didn't know how to respond. So his father really wasn't lying to help Dimitri? "Why do you want to spend time with him so much? You like him or something?"

Claude chuckled again, "Or something. Dimitri is amazing. However..." He trailed off, rearranging what he was going to say. "I have different reasons to spend so much time with the prince of Garreg Mach."

"Prince?" Felix's face twisted, "What about him is princely? I'd call him a wild animal over anything."

Claude started to laugh, his words interrupted from it. "W-wild an-imal? Where did that come from?" His mouth covered with his dark hand composing himself. He lowered it and winked. Felix knew it was coming. "Are you saying that he's a prince in the streets, animal in the she-"

"Don't. Even. Finish. Never in a million years would I have sex with him. It's repulsive. He's disgusting and you are for even thinking that."

Claude snorted trying hold the laugh in, "Okay. It's just that for a long time people thought you were together, me included."

His eyebrow shot up, "When did they start that?"

Claude only now went somewhat serious. His face screaming 'Are you kidding?' "It was when we all were our last year of middle school and first of high school. You two were LITERALLY hip to hip most days." He lowered his voice to a whispered mumble, "Not to mention how handsy he got at times. His touching wasn't sexual or anything. But he was ALWAYS touching you."

Was that weird? The four of them was never to shy away from physical touch. It was just a way to comfort the other when words failed them. Then after Miklan, Ingrid and Dimitri did their best to make Felix feel at ease. Always softly touching his elbow before wrapping their arm around his, or touching his back before pulling him into a side, one armed hug or a full one. Dimitri probably was more so. Afterall, they did get closer once Sylvain was taken away.He went from the nice but somewhat meek kid to the anti-social ass he is now sometime after Glenn's 'suicide'.

"It was normal for us back then." Still is in a way. The touches just aren't as gentle anymore. His hands started to run over his wrists. "What made you think we were? I know you act like it, however you don't really take rumours into consideration."

Claude smiled, showing his perfectly aligned white teeth. "Didn't think you paid much attention, since you act like you can't stand me most the time." 

His eyes lowered without hostility, but he tried to seem threatening all the same. "Don't have to like you to know you. You're not that hard to read. Even if you think you're good at hiding it."

"And that's why i'm sooo interested in you. You claim to have no patience whatsoever with idiots or loud mouths, yet those are the ones you hang out with most. There are exceptions of course, but most of your friends are very loud. Caspar for instance."

"Shut it. He may have a one track mind. And his grades aren't the best. He keeps them up enough to stay on the wrestling team. He is one of the best people to spar with. Mostly because he works hard to always improve. People only see Caspar as loud and stupid because of how he is in class. But those dumbasses don't even blink at the fact that he has at least two separate colleges wanting him from the sport." He was getting irritated.

"Woah now. Take it easy. I didn't mean anything bad." Claude reared back in surrender, playful expression remaining on his face until he looked down. His smile dropped and his eyes were looking at- Felix followed his gaze until- Shit! He hurried to cover the sleeves back down. "What are those from?"

"Practice." He clipped.

"Practice?" He asked, disbelief rolling on top of his nonchalant reply.

"Yes." 

"Looks like it got a little out of control. Need to watch it with that adrenaline. You can be seriously hurt and not know." Felix was glad he dropped it by switching the topic. "It's actually a good thing I ran into you. The apology went good too. Glad I went with what I did instead of what I thought the first time."

Felix had to ask. "What was your first idea?"

"Heh. I heard from the grapevine you liked music. Which by that, I mean Ingrid. Thought you would hit me after so I rethought my strategy. " Claude reached into his front pocket and pulled something out, gave it a little twirl in his hand and put it to his lips and breathed a tune from it. Felix watched in astonishment at Claude playing the upbeat and lively tune. He didn't interrupt and listened to the end.

He... Certainly got into it, closing his green eyes and swaying to his made up melody. Felix was impressed somehow. He thought kazoos were mostly for children. Sylvain told him that they can sound good if someone knows how to play them right. It seems like he was correct. Not like he's gonna tell Claude he's good at it. It will only manage to fill his ego even more.

"So," Claude gave him a side look while wiping the lip piece off with a small cloth he toom from his pocket. "How was that?" His smile lessened with each second of silence from Felix, who was only staring at him in a natural, dazed stare. "Uh. That bad then?" He sighed, "I guess my kazoo skills really aren't that good after all." His slouch in his sitting led to him standing and softly putting his kazoo back into his hoodie. "I'll see you around then. I'll try not to bother you that much in the fu-"

"Your thinking was right."

"Huh?" Claude's quick turn back to the bench and his face lighting up with hope. 

"If you would have played me that for an apology, I would've punched you," He paused and strengthened his stare, "Hard."

"Is that right?" Claude huffed in amusement. "Well then, glad I just bit the bullet and did it the way I did then. Made me super uncomfortable." He threw his hands behind his head and grinned. "Hey, I know. Why don't I take it a step further and invite you to breakfast? My treat." The casual wink following behind. The familiarity he gets from this guy is astounding.

He WAS getting hungry again and Sylvain and the other two are probably already at the place and eating. "Fine. I'll humor you." The little fist pump was so childish. Claude also said he was interested in him. Is it okay to go with him? He should say something so he doesn't get the wrong idea. "Just so you know, i'm already in a relationship. This isn't a date." 

"A date?" He got what Felix was saying. Bright green eyes widened as he put his hands forward and backed away. "No! I think I might have gave you the wrong impression." Felix tilted his head lightly, signaling him to continue. "What I meant when I said I was interested in you, wasn't that. It's because you've changed quite a bit from the very first time I met you." 

"The first time?" Felix was drawing a blank. He knew he met Claude in high school. The very first time they met is what's difficult to remember. "When-"

"I can see that you're having trouble remembering. Why don't we go for a bite and i'll tell you there?"

"Okay. Wait a minute." He took his phone out and looked at his messages. Ingrid, Annette, Fana, Caspar, Dimitri and Rodrigue had either called or left a message. He'll have to respond to them all soon. Just not yet. He doesn't want to think about what made him storm out in the first place. So for now, he's just going to look at Ingrid's.

HEY FE! JUST SENDING THE ADDRESS TO THE PLACE WE'RE GOING. HOPE YOU CAN MAKE IT! 😘

Sylvain. He sighed, fighting the heat that started to rise. It's just a stupid winking emoji with a heart. Control yourself. The text wasn't that long ago, but they could've already been there when he sent it. Oh well, it's fine. He read her next message.

THAT IDIOT GOT US KICKED OUT OF THE RESTAURANT!! AND HE'S BEING ALL SMUG ABOUT IT! I DIDN'T GET TO EVEN EAT ALL MY FOOD, THE JERK! I'll have to pick up something quick now. Dorothea and him went somewhere else to eat. She said she'll have him back after they're done.

That idiot. Felix put his phone away.

"Ready?" He nodded to Claude. "Let's go." His hand went into view. Claude was offering to assist. He took his hand to let Claude help him to stand. "Oh wow! Love the new style you got going on today! It really suits you. What's the occasion?" He wiggled his eyebrows.

"It's all I had at my mother's place. Can you let go now?"

"But your hand feels so nice."

"Claude!"

"Okay! Don't hit!" He screamed as he very narrowly dodged the kick that Felix sent to his calf.

~~~~~~~~~~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Claude totally played Edge of Dawn on the Kazoo.  
> *Winning into the Dawn intensifies*  
> Just playing.  
> Thanks for reading! Feedback and comments always welcome!

**Author's Note:**

> The ages I have with Sylvain and Felix are pre time skip while Mercedes, Marianne and Linhart are closer to post to fit their occupation. I don't know what possessed me to do this but I at least hope someone finds it interesting.


End file.
